Disgust
Disgust
Hello my beautiful empathic sisters :)
I'm finally getting the free time to post this week. I missed you.
So, I am experiencing a new emotion. I thought I had been through them all and was an expert on them. I went through the anguish and disbelief and rage and deep depression. I went through anxiey and fear like crazy. Now I have disgust and contempt. Here I thought I was done, at the holy 'acceptance stage', forgiving him and all.
My problem is that he isn't charming. He's not hoovering. He's just an asshole and while I was kind to him when I saw him, I was left with not rage but this new sense of repulsion.
I thought about the dog incident and him sleeping with that nasty ugly x stripper x girlfriend of his on his vacation and remembered I let him put that thing in me so many time. I let that POS marry me and almost break me. I feel sick. I'm vascilating between that with touches of rage. Mostly, I'm trying to redirect my thoughts because I'm so repulsed by him that being angry at him annoys me because he's so not even worth my thoughts in a bad way.
I haven't really read about this as a 'stage'. Maybe it's what happens after you have let go and have to be in contact (blue-eyes?). Mine has no reason to hoover and even his nice enough emails are met with contemptive responces from me because, i honestly, don't give a shit.
The little bit of shit I do give it completely anger and disgust.
Very strange. Very gross. It feels oddly poisonous, like the rage. I don't like feeling contempt or disgust or rage. It just makes me feel mad at him for making me feel this way! LOL.... Then I think, 'is this how he felt about ME???' F@#K HIM..
something for some of you to look forward to I suppose :)
Happy Friday, Goddesses.
Disgust
fierflie< to answer your question..
More disgust
More disgust...
wow... thats some really
Yeah, glad it didn't get to the dating stage...
I love reaching that point...
movingforward...LMAO..
Youre getting there, Fireflie
I'd only use "forgiveness" to F him over...
shaynasmommy
I'm with you
Never make someone a priority who only makes you an option.
hey breathdeep
cause he's not happy.
(((((((((Fierflie)))))))))
~~~ Keep Learning & Keep Healing ~~~
~~~~~ The best revenge is to survive and be victorious over it. Nobody can take from you what you don't give them.