The damage they do
The damage they do
For the unlucky women, months turn into years as they ride the roller coaster going nowhere. From heart stopping curves to death wish drops, they hate the ride but donâ€™t know how to get off.
Interestingly, no matter how long the women were in the relationship, the aftermath symptoms were the same. This means any exposure to pathology is psychologically devastating. The aftermath severity happens because the pathological uses forms of mind controlâ€¦ It is hard to fathom but the pathologicalâ€™s goal is to succeed in controlling and destroying a woman, â€¦not to have a successful relationship with her.
A pathological does devious kinds of acts to try to make his woman think she is having a nervous breakdown or is mentally deficient so she relies on his â€œtakeâ€ of reality. If mind control is psychologically damaging to prisoners of war, it is just as damaging to the intimate partners of pathologicals. Pathologicals will go to great lengths to inflict psychological devastation, because they enjoy the process.
He â€¦claims â€¦that he â€œknows peopleâ€ who get the information for him. This increases her paranoia and fear and adds to the psychopathâ€™s mystique. He plays "nice guy" to make her doubt herself and doubt that there's anything wrong with him.
They will agree to changes and then act as if they never had the conversation about the changes. They will admit behaviors when caught and later deny they admitted them. They will get caught red-handed and later deny she ever â€¦heard, or found out what he did. He will use other accomplices to validate his stories to increase her sensation that she is going crazy. Wealthy pathologicals will financially bribe others to control the outcome of situations that continue to support his mirage of lies.
Womenâ€¦ may have PTSD symptoms resulting from mind control, and coercion. All of these conditions result from a victimâ€™s bonding and emotional connection to her captor/abuser. These symptoms are often seen in prisoners of war, hostages, and cult members.
â€¦but she is not an easy woman to â€œtake down.â€ Self-control will hold her strong even in the face of these pathological-created delusions. â€¦Some of the women indicated they stayed far too long trying to â€œfigure outâ€ what was going on or to go toe-to-toe with him so he couldnâ€™t get something else over on them. Most of the women said they were baffled by the strange dynamics in the relationship and stayed until they had some kind of cognitive understanding of what they had been living through.
As the emotional stress, physical, and sexual exhaustion are taking their toll, her failed reality testing continues. She begins thinking paranormal things are happening around her. The constant ups and downs of the relationship are now eroding this strong womanâ€™s sense of self-confidence and resourcefulnessâ€”just what the pathological intended.
As she starts to psychologically decompensate, she experiences the same [ ] dynamics that are seen in the Stockholm Syndrome:
* She perceives (and has already experienced) a threat to her physical or psychological survival and believes he has the ability to carry out his threats. By now, she has already lived months â€¦of him carrying out his ability to harm herâ€¦
* Perceived small kindnesses from him to her set the emotional tone for her letting down her guard and seeing him as human or kind again. This also increases her relationship investment and hope in him.
* Isolation from outside perspectives other than his. She has already experienced not only isolation from others but the indoctrination of his pathological world viewâ€¦
As she decompensates, she is an easier mark for continued manipulation by the pathological. It is uncertain if psychopaths have a natural ability by nature of their pathology to simply unconsciously perpetrate these types of mental â€œset-upsâ€ or if the â€œset-upsâ€â€™ are systemically planned so that just watching her psychologically melt before his very eyes is a power pump for him. Our guess would be the later.
If pathologicals didnâ€™t like the game of manipulation, they would consistently choose women who are introverted and who would be a far easier capture than taking on powerful extraverted women. But that is in fact, exactly why most (not all) pathologicals choose the powerful extraverted woman. To that end, we have to assume that the pathological predator enjoys watching a previously high-functioning woman turn into a reality-doubting, exhausted, bundle of nerves which he finds pretty erotic.
Sadly, some of the pathologicalâ€™s women only make it out of their torment through suicide. The ultimate power triumph for a psychopathâ€”he conquered her spirit and won. He scoops up and moves on to the next woman/victimâ€¦
Inevitable Harm: Every woman was harmed
â€œI realized I had been seduced by a con man and I spent months in shock, trying to figure out just who he really is.â€
A relationship with a pathological man is not like any other failed relationship. The women who loved pathologicals are not just 'bitter women scorned'. It is simply not possible to have a relationship with a pathological and not be harmed and damaged to a significant degree.
One woman expressed,
"It has been over four years since our relationship ended and I still get anxiety attacks at the thought of dating â€“ I am still single and have adopted a hermit lifestyle to make sure I never go through anything like this again.â€
The relationship with a pathological has resulted in many women living out their lives alone without a partner.
The medical side effects of post traumatic stress disorder that many of the women developed from the relationship (as well as other acute stress disorders) will long manifest in her body. Medical side effects that continue on, long after the psychopath has left, include:
* Auto immune disorders
* Substance abuse
* Digestive disorders
* High blood pressure
â€œThis relationship has taken a grave physical toll on my body. I have several conditions. I look about 20 years older than I actually am.â€
Many of the women experienced sexual damage and negative effects on their sexuality. Having been exposed to deviant sexual practices, humiliated about their sexual performance or bodies, compared to other women, and often sexually harmedâ€¦
Long term damage
Women who have been in relationships with ppathologicals universally experience some sort of acute stress. The acute stress could have evolved into Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or other types of stress disorders. The lingering disorders serve as reminders of past pain and are likely to cause the women symptoms for years and maybe for life.
Sandra Brown, MA - WOMEN WHO LOVE PSYCHOPATHS
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"As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
reading this literally
'often picks energetic, loving, successful, passionate people'
that explains it
powerful, extroverted woman...YES!!
the damage they do
This is a VERY good post. It
read the book
recommended reading for recovery support
the damage they do
the damage they do
Great Post!!! Thank You Barbara!!!!
They never change. He will build you up and then suck you dry!!!!!!
thank you for underlining the way i have exactly felt
they manage to spin it on us that