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cycles and their patterns??

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#1 Jan 1 - 6AM
Emptyheart
Emptyheart's picture

cycles and their patterns??

I would like to ask if anyone knows, or has had experience of the time spans and cylcles that N#s work with.

I have noticed mine seems to have a three monthly time span of interest, being full on and then not wanting face to face contact.

Recently he has started to text only every three days, he has said his wife checks his phone, so I am not to text him until he does me.
(I know this is control on his part, all about him!)

Has anyone elsse had this, noticed a time span, if he hears nothing from you, he can only last a certain time before he HAS to have his fix???

Just interested to know, many thanks.

Jan 1 - 11AM
Gravity
Gravity's picture

emptyheart

Totally depends. N's see things only in terms of what benefits them. He see's you as a computer that he can use whenever he wants. He doesn't see you as a separate entity, and certainly not as a human being. If he wants something from you that day, that minute, that second, then he'll reach out. If his ego needs a hit, he'll contact you, or someone else. And trust me there is some one else.. or 2 or 3 or 4 AND his wife. You're worth more than supply for some idiot! Let his wife have him, better her than you and she's a victim too! BEST WISHES FOR A NARC FREE NEW YEAR! It's not all about him it's all about YOU! xoxoxo
Jan 1 - 10AM
Soldier Girl
Soldier Girl's picture

Poor wife

He is there gas lighting her and she is thinking she's crazy Go Nc
Jan 1 - 11AM (Reply to #7)
Redhead
Redhead's picture

yes Goldie!!

that's exactly what he's doing!!
Jan 1 - 10AM (Reply to #5)
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Which would make her one of US, SG

NC is best in this situation. There will be NO winners here. God bless, Goldie
Jan 1 - 1PM (Reply to #6)
Soldier Girl
Soldier Girl's picture

Yes sure Goldie

It makes all the women involved with a narc a pawn But with Nc we can't be played
Jan 1 - 7AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

There is nothing for you here

Just pain, pain, and more pain. Why are you giving this man all of your power? He is calling all the shots because he is cheating on his wife. This is clear to see for those of us not caught up in the emotions. Get out and stop playing the doormatt. He simply wants his cake and eat it too and when something else is going on, he has no time for you. You need to get to a therapist or schedule a one on one with me and we can explore WHY you continue to engage in this unhealthy relationship. This ends when YOU end it, he is doing what works best for HIM. You need to begin to do what works best for YOU. If this is working for you and you want to ask questions about what his next move may be then this is where you are at right now. If this is NOT working for you, then let's get busy on taking the steps to get YOU out of this. God bless, Goldie
Jan 1 - 7AM
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

emptyheart

I know it is very difficult to move on but try with everything you have, mine use to go every 2-4 months and then he would try and reach out to me and i would always go back like a love sick puppy, now he knows I know who he is and I will never hear from him again.. he is a scared little coward/toddler..
Jan 1 - 7AM
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Emptyheart

I read somewhere that some abusive men do follow a pattern. Simply put, they do it because it works. You have accepted what he is doing, so why would he ever change? He's a happy camper. Please try your best to stop the cycle of abuse. No one should be treated with such disrespect.