Co-dependency

I'm pretty new to the site but have found it to be very therapeutic and supportive. There really is something to the idea that no one else really understands on the same level as those who have experienced it. Thank you all! I would like to bring up the subject of co-dependency. Through my therapy and getting healthier I have learned that I definitely added to my own marriage break-down by living in co-dependency with my husband. That is not to say that his addiction and N was in any way my fault. I do not believe that but do see how I chose to continually be co-dependent on a sick and N man. I thought it would be good for us all to take a look at how we have done this and to share some of that with each other. Not to diminish in any way what 'they' have put us through but to keep from making some of those same mistakes in the future. I also want to pass along to my adult daughters all that I learn in that area so they too can dodge the same pitfalls. I am sending along a song my girlfriend wrote when she was angry at her addicted/N husband at the time. The word "co" in the song stands for co-dependent because we all know how dependent they also are (on their N Supply of course!)

My Angry Song By: T. McCall

(to the tune of "You're So Vain")

You walked into our marriage
Like you were walking into a yard
Your brain strategically dipped below your heart
Your dick it was really hard
You had one eye in the mirror
As you watched yourself go by
And you dreamed that all the girls, be your partner
They'd be your partner, and

You're so co
You probably think your problems about me
You're so co
I'll bet you think your problems about me
Don't you? Don't you?

You had me several years ago
When I was still quite naive
Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair
And that you would never leave
But you gave away the things you loved
And one of them was me

I had some dreams you had erectile dysfunction
erectile dysfunction... and

You're so co
You probably think your problems about me
You're so co
I'll bet you think your problems about me
Don't you? Don't you?

Well, I hear you went to counselor
And your lies naturally won
Then you drove your addiction to a xxx club
And took your penis out for some fun
Well, you're where you should be all the time
And when you're not, you're with
Some big breast gal or the wife of a close friend,
wife of a close friend, and

You're so co
You probably think your problems about me
You're so co
I'll bet you think your problems about me
Don't you? Don't you?

You're so co
You probably think your problems about me
You're so co
You probably think your problems about me
You're so co
You probably think your problems about me

You're so co (so co)
I'll bet you think your problems about me
Don't you? Don't you? Don't you?