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bisexuality

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#1 Dec 9 - 11PM
Anonymous (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

bisexuality

A few of us have made comments they sometimes thought their narc was gay. I have questioned this possibility for a long time. While I realize the sex addicts like to try anything there were too many odd things I questioned. He always wanted to make sure if I brought a man for us they would do BOTH WAYS, thinking it would turn me on for him to jerk off another man in front of me and if I liked he could give him a blow job. This is highly wrong, my counselor definately said he was bi, but is not sure which way he leaned more towards, and there were at times a slight feminity about him, sometimes I think he is a closet gay and hides it fiercely. He always asked about gay bars and seemed to know where they were. I dont think he is straight and I dont think he would be with a man just for the experience of something sick, I think he actually enjoys the thought of being with a man, he always goes on hunting trips withe the same man every year, this is a man he goes to the mall with, and also this is the man who called him to say goodbye before he went on vacation, just too strange, and I dont believe for a sec he thought I would enjoy seeing him wth another man, I think HE enjoys it. what gives?

Dec 10 - 1PM
JuneBug (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

JuneBug N's have homosexual

JuneBug N's have homosexual tendencies. They usually have them towards a male figure in their lives, someone who is good to them and who gives them what an older, parental figure never game them. My xN literally told one of his 'best' friends 'I love you' when he went back home, I late figured out that my xN never had a good relationship with his brother. There was much competition between them and he seemed to be abandoned by him. He idealized his friend as the brother he never had, although this much in his head. I think his friend felt sorry for him.
Dec 10 - 2PM (Reply to #9)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

JuneBug

you didn't read my reply they are NOT bisexual they are ANYsexual genuine bisexuality is normal for some. Ns are ANYTHING BUT normal! ~~~~~~~~~ The truth will set you free... but first it will piss you off - Gloria Steinem Visit My Abuse Website
Dec 10 - 2PM (Reply to #10)
JuneBug (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

JuneBug ANYsexual...Ugh,

JuneBug ANYsexual...Ugh, that sounds disgusting, they sound like the eternal whores, yet they try to project that onto others.
Dec 9 - 11PM
nhtmf
nhtmf's picture

Brokeback Mountain?

Mine X is a cerebral so all sex was dirty. He does have a feminine way about him that is prominent. Also he acts the homophobe big time. Says he doesn't hate gay men but he just can't be around them. Afraid of his own tendencies? Hmm, often wondered about that cuz I sure as hell wasn't getting any !!!!!
Dec 9 - 11PM (Reply to #2)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Not Gay

Narcs are not "secret gays" there are gay Narcissists out there just like hetero ones... but NO... Narcs are also not Bisexual... since everyone and everything IS AN OBJECT TO THEM - Narcs are ANY-SEXUALS ANYTHING will do. Literally. many Sexual Narcissists proclaim homophobia - again NEVER LISTEN TO WHAT THEY SAY WATCH WHAT THEY DO!!! ~~~~~~~~~ The truth will set you free... but first it will piss you off - Gloria Steinem Visit My Abuse Website
Dec 11 - 5PM (Reply to #7)
Amazed
Amazed's picture

Barbara

Great post, thank you for the insight, wow,,so true.
Dec 10 - 7AM (Reply to #3)
4joys4
4joys4's picture

The will f anyone. Male or

They will f anyone. Male or female. Thats what it's all about. All the N's I've known were like this. Thats why I asked this same question a few weeks back. Just want to encourage you to try to stop getting in his head. Who cares what he thought. He's sick is all you need to know. Try to concentrate on you and your healing and putting your life back together. I understand obsession after an ordeal like this. It's rough. Distract yourself.
Dec 10 - 9AM (Reply to #4)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

They will f anyone. Male or female.

YUCK, So they are these creatures that roam the earth and stick it in anything that feels good, mine sure was turned on with homosexuality with women and men and really was into watching others have sex while he watched personally up close and personal two feet away. They take human body parts and make everything perverse, twisted, dirty and sick, and to think a year ago I kept thinking I was deficient in some way, why he would reject an attractive good woman as myself, when it was always their sick and distorted way they view people and the world they live in. I put myself through hell for absolutely nothing, but its how he left me and until we can truly understand their illness the whys dont matter anymore as we heal and that is what I need to work on stop trying to figure out WHY he did this, or that, it wont bring me closure. I will say it feels WONDERFUL to finally have the obsessive insecure thoughts of the GF behind me and the life they have together, its a sick relationship just as he is sick. Can you imagine being with someone when you are out with other couples and your psychopath partner is always sizing the other woman or man up wondering what it would be like for all of you to have a f--k fest? I mean this is the way mine thinks. Oh something else I read in the book WWLP, their accumulated wealth and all the show, the nice home, fancy cars, boats, whatever its not to so much to enjoy but more as a symbol for status and power for them thats more important than actually enjoying it, his home was a mansion but cold and bare, nothing warm in it, it looked like one of those show homes they build for people to take tours thru, it looked like nobody lived in it, nothing personal or decorative displayed just a wood floor and marble tops, COLD just like they are it truly reflected what he was. Amazing how when we heal and look back and see the frauds they are we can see everything in their lives is just for effect, the house, the GF, its all the same to them nothing has any true meaning to them, NOTHING
Dec 11 - 5PM (Reply to #6)
JusticeSeeker (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Suspect It

Looking back, I suspect my Ex may have had some homosexual tendencies. He sure played video games a lot at other mens' houses. He goes out to eat every Tuesday night with the same 1-2 men. That's just great to think about. Makes me sick to my stomach. Not that he could be gay, just that he would "do" anything he could, whenever and wherever he could. You are right about the fancy cars, homes etc. My Ex has always had beautiful sports cars. Right now he has a gorgeous Corvette (which I would like to cover in gas and set fire to, but that's another thread! Ha). He also drives a BMW. POWER POWER POWER
Dec 10 - 10AM (Reply to #5)
time_to_move_on
time_to_move_on's picture

yeah...

I don't think they're bi-sexual. The last guy I went out with, I'm not 100% sure if he was narc/bpd/sociopath, he had a lot of issues with sex generally, some of that was down to abuse, so I don't think he'd have slept with a man. Saying that all his fantasy talk involved me, him, and another man, I've never had other guys do that. But I did go out with another one years ago, who I'm sure was a sexual narc. Wanted it all the time, even if I was ill. His brother was gay, and we were out in the gay district in Manchester, a city in the north of England. He told me afterwards, "oh, everyone was laughing when we were out as I was with you, I've just found out that was because my brother put a profile up of me (as in my bf) on gaydar, he said I got good results though". As if his brother did it. I am now fairly certain he did it himself just for kicks. While with me. Hmm. I carried on going out with him for a bit after that too... I was so naive.