becoming friends with some of you!

I was too wrapped up (paralyzed) in my pain and recovery to reach out a hand of friendship to any of you when I first joined, a total mess, last winter.
I still have problems but I can laugh and play again now, most days! I still have blue days but I think it is because I work too much and don't spend enough time with friends. Being alone too much with an obsessive brain is not good...I realize that my friends in my other home, in a small town, are really much more true friends than my big city professional friends here - we are all so driven and wrapped up in ourselves - it is not really living!

Could some of you who reached out to me in early recovery reach out again? Some of you who I really connected with have left the site, but some of you who I admire alot are still here from last winter. You all have helped me SO much and I want to know who you are. I must say I am still busy as hell (hate this pace), but that will improve in November.

I really need the fellowship now....I want to apologize that it has taken me so long to be able to even be open to getting to know new people. I could not handle anything but safe and familiar for a long time, which is why I have not dated yet. Only man I talk to is my triple Ex (yep, we broke up around 1995 and are just becoming friends, real friends - we know each other so well, it has been good for both of us - we don't want anything from each other and can tell each other almost anything - plus he is smart, oh what a relief to have a decent conversation again! That crazy parrot talk was so freaking boring and weird!! Yes, I had one of the classic style N's who could only mimic and say stupid things rather than make a thoughtful comment - I was intellectually deprived!!!! and love starved! I chose to be with a dodo bird! Ayyyyyy