Anonymous Letter Writing Thread

You claim your ex husband beat you. And so did the one before that. And the boyfriend before that. There were many times I wished N would hit me. Then people could see the scars. The pain. But that was the point. I hurt because no one saw it. I thought I should just kill myself because, well, people would think I was crazy for saying my husband was anything less than perfect. Even I couldn't see what he was doing to me right before my very eyes. Its called covert abuse. By the time he gets done with you, you will be begging for the pain who claimed you had when you accused all those other men of hitting you. At least bruises heal. http://hubpages.com/hub/Married-to-a-Narcissist?preview nolongercontrolled

When your relationship began, did you feel like you were soul mates, he was the most perfect man you had ever met? Did things progress unnaturally quickly, and before you knew it you were so close, maybe even moving in with each other or tying the knot? Do you find that as soon as you thought you had a commitment to each other, he started to push you away? Do some of the things he tells you sound odd? Does he say negative things about ex-friends, ex-spouses, family members, etc? Has he alienated many people? Has he an abnormal sense of entitlement, and an inflated self opinion? Do you find that some many, if not all, of his "accomplishments" are mostly in his mind, and in fact he has done very little with himself? Do you catch him in lies all the time? Lies of omission? Is he a hypochondriac, and obsessed with the workings of his own body? Any odd sexual preferences, or does he withhold sex as a way to control you? Does he tell you that he has a history of abusive parents, or that he mother never appreciated anything he did while he was growing up? Does he have a problem with alcohol or drugs? An addictive personality? Does he have a problem with money--as soon as he gets his hands on some, he spends it all on himself and his latest whims.. Is he always in debt? Do you find you need to clean up his messes, either financial, personal, or social? Does he depend on you to do this, and then dump on you? Are you starting to doubt everything he says? Are you afraid to criticize him, because if you do he will either give you the silent treatment, rage, leave, or devalue and discard you? Has he left you, only to keep coming back? Have you tried to leave him, only to find that he won't let you go? Do you feel used? Do you feel like you are on an emotional roller coaster, and once you give him your love he rejects you? The above is a list of some of the traits of a Narcissist. Yours may not have all of them, or might exhibit others that have not been stated. A Narcissist is like a vampire that uses you for his supply, he takes your love and what you give him and uses you like a mirror so he can define himself. There is nothing inside this narcissist, he is completely empty inside. This is hard to believe, but without others to mirror back to him, he can not survive. A Narcissist is not a human being, but rather a shell or an "imitator". He is a predator that walks among other human beings, pretending to be one---- but the mask comes off at times, to reveal the monster inside. A Narcissist is very good at imitating the behavior of normal human beings and you might be fooled for quite awhile, depending on how good he is at it. Eventually, over time, your relationship will unravel. This is a very painful process. Most of us in this group at www.lisascott.com have gone through what you are, some have healed, and many are thriving. We are here on this forum to help each other survive the fall-out of our relationships with our narcissists and help others like yourselves understand what has happened and how to deal with it. We are here for you. Please feel free to join our group, tell your story, participate in our forums and use our resources as need be. If you are involved with a Narcissist you will need the support of others like yourself to free yourself and become strong enough to start redefining your life without him. There will be lightness and happiness again when you come out of the darkness that defines the world and a life with a Narcissist. Please let us help you.

This email comes from the sisterhood. We need women like us to help women like you. So, you've found love. The man of your dreams, he's too good to be true. Bet you love all the emails, text messages, flowers, poetry and talk of love. I have you ever wondered to yourself he's amazing he really knows me and he's so intelligent? Have you ever felt really sorry for him because his dad abused him as a child? Have you ever thought I can't believe his ex was so cruel to him, and she hit him and took the house and won't let him see the children much? Have you ever wondered, I've never met someone so into me I've never had this before? have you ever wondered he's so amazing with his children and my son? Have ever wondered what narcissism is? Have you ever looked on the net about narcissistic personality disorder? Look it up it may save your life.