For active daters especially-detailed mind control techniques

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#1 Jun 4 - 5PM

sadlymistaken

For active daters especially-detailed mind control techniques

http://www.fastseduction.com/guide/03_Approaching/11_The_Patterns/

The above includes a message board and is a great site to poke around on for awhile if you want to learn how the type of men that use these techniques feel about and view women. Disgusting and frightening. Please share this info with ALL the girls or women you know who date.

http://www.mindcontrol101.com/wiki/index.php?title=Dark_NLP_Patterns&pri...

Word for word techniques. Has anyone had any of these used on them?

http://74.6.117.48/search/srpcache?ei=UTF-8&p=%22the+hospital+pattern%22...

Deeper explanations.

http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/guide-to-school-sarging-vt5741.html

Scroll down to the 3rd post by negsta. It gives a step by step approach of how to completely break a GIRL (this is a thread talking about high school!) and recreate her to bend to your every desire.

Ugh. This is so sad and depressing. But spreading this info is the only way to save the innocent. :(

#2 Jun 6 - 1AM

Goldie

As painful as this is to read

I think that it is essential that women become educated as to what these freaks are doing to us. Knowledge is power and the more we know the better we are at disarming them and avoiding such beasts all together. I have heard about these male training ground sites before and have not studies them much. I am interested in learning more about this; it could prove uselfull in deprogrammig women who have been victims of these mind control techniques. Just another reason to stay away from these disordered men. Last year when I was still trying to figure out my Narc and if he was cheating on me, I went on his facebook and started talking to one of his friends pretending to be him. I said, I can't stand this bitch (me) and I can't take anymore of it. This guy tells me (him) about this site where all the girls are fatloads and insecure. They will do what ever you want them to do and you don't have to spend much money on them. They have kids and they are desparate. YOu just call into the chatline and trust me, you'll have a bitch to f--- by the end of the night and most of them will come to you. My guess was that if this guy was telling my X to do this, he must have been down that road before. The basic premise was that the heavy set ones with children were insecure and easy targets, like this was a known fact and they were targeting them. The whole thing made me sick. We need to smarten up to this shit and avoid it at all cost. I think it is like anything. Once you get educated to it, then you have the control, you have the power to cut these losers off at the pass. Thanks for sharing: women helping women once again. God bless, Goldie

#3 Jun 4 - 6PM

ValiditySeeker

I'm speechless

I hope there aren't too many "men" out there buying into thus shut or using it. It makes me feel a little sick, actually.

#4 Jun 4 - 6PM

sadlymistaken

"Innocent" slight insults=he's manipulating you

In my experience, the "neg" hit is the most commonly used and they often use it very quickly after meeting, often DURING the introduction. This is GREAT because these guys can be easy to spot just from this technique since a normal guy who has just met a woman he's interested in will NEVER insult her. I used to brush these off because I can take a joke. But never again. It's a tell-tale sign the guy will be a manipulator from beginning to end. http://www.sosuave.com/articles/neghits.htm http://www.theplayersociety.com/articles/neg-hits.html Anyone recognize experiencing this?

#5 Jun 4 - 6PM (Reply to #2)

Amazed

Yes!! The slight insult, yet "invite" dicotomy

Yes, it is very subtle, but once you pick it up you can identify it immediately. For example, they offer "dinner and a movie" and their invite doesn't hit you quite the right way. It is his thing, not yours. It causes you to go way out of your way, and you KNOW it is for his satisfaction only, not yours. If you respond that you are not available, then there is some confusing remark from the Narc that makes you go huh? Like a guilt trip remark. When you honestly need to do something. Or you get together, you are all dressed up, and makes a comment about something minor "the dry skin on your elbows, thats a sign of age." They are very rude, and then they want to pet you after this, they are evil. You start to notice it, as you never feel on the same page as them. Very true, and horrible.

#6 Jun 4 - 7PM (Reply to #3)

Amazed

Here are some other manipulative tricks they use

1. Never call you by your name, which is a lack of respect. 2. Comments that are feigned to be nice, but have an undertone of insult. State the obvious, and minimize your intellect to that of a retard. Statements like " I hope at least you are enjoying the nice weather" Already gone, get a life an stop hovering me. 3. Act like they are sooooo supportive of you, yet their lives are falling apart in shambles. Aaah, how can I feel secure when you live like a teenager and can't handle true responsibilites. 4. They never truly mirror your true gifts, do not let you grow or share experiences where you grow. They do know mirror you for the whole package that you are. They do not validate your strength, this keeps them "above" you. Great. I need an equal, not someone "above" me. 5. They do a pattern of stupid things. Accidentally, and this keeps them CONSTANTY at the center of attention. Believe me, you will know when you feel it. 6. You feel their communication is not like everyone else you know. Something is just not right, not straightforward. That is because they are trying to twist you, and weaken you. 7. They suck.

#7 Jun 4 - 8PM (Reply to #10)

heritage

Amazed

I was also thinking about the way he communicated with me. It was informational things, not a conversation. He rarely discussed things and if he did he was right. But I always got tidbits of info like so and so did this, end of conversation. or I'm going to move my practice. It was weird because he said we were going to marry once my divorce was final but I was always at arms length. I never felt like a "partner" with him.

#8 Jun 5 - 8PM (Reply to #13)

wacaet

mine very rarely wanted to

mine very rarely wanted to know anything about my life but was always complaining about his we had 1 conversation where he asked my opinion about something (a job offer that I think he was actually lying about). He didn't ask about my job, my life (except, oddly, to ask how my husband was handling me leaving and then to say "if I had you and you left I'd curl up into a corner and die) I Hate N's and the "games" they play

#9 Jun 5 - 7AM (Reply to #12)

helldweller

Its amazing the way

the complete lack of communication became acceptable so quickly. At first, when he was peddling the "I'm a bumbling middle aged guy" act, it was so easy to figure that "Gee, no wonder he's alone. He can't say one sentence or ask a single question." In four years he never once asked me how my day was, what was going on in my life, what my plans were for the weekend, how my daughters were, what I thought about something, nothing. The only thing he ever asked me was what I wanted to eat when we were going out to dinner (about four times total). Of course, I almost always said, doesn't matter. After which he would sigh because he was being so generous as to ask me to dinner and I didn't even know where I wanted to go. ugh. blech. It was so weird early on because there was this complete lack of overlap in our lives. Like he never said, "Hey, I'm going to do some errands. Do you want to come and we'll grab lunch?" or "Hey, I got some great steaks from this butcher shop and thought we'd grill them. Does that some good?" There was never the afternoon phone call that you have in a normal relationship where you just figure out what you're doing, together, later. Never an assumption that we'd be together. In a normal relationship, the goal is to be together if neither of you is doing anything (except of course for "me" time occasionally), but with him the schedules were completely separate. He didn't need them to overlap, he didn't want them to overlap. He didn't even want to know what I was doing, let alone do it with me. But he did want to make sure I was in love with him, devoted to him, and never leaving him. Ugh. Blech.

#10 Jun 5 - 6AM (Reply to #11)

onwithmylife

Dentalas

I, too, NEVER felt like a partner with my exnarc, the only time I may have felt that way was when we were looking for house together and he was salivating at getting a hold of my money and 2 times I did not even protect my assets and the one time I did and went to a lawyer he got real mad at me.

#11 Jun 4 - 7PM (Reply to #4)

ruby01 (not verified)

1. Never call you by your name, which is a lack of respect.

I always thought it was so cold how he referred to his ex's as The Redhead, The Super Hot One, or The Young One. All I could do was think Great what the hell am I going to be called?!! Haha

#12 Jun 5 - 7AM (Reply to #9)

Susan32

More formal than Colin Firth in a Costume Drama

The ex-Psych prof couldn't stand calling people by their first name.... when I met his girlfriend, he referred to her in a businesslike way, as "Miss G---",it was so cold. To top it off, the girlfriend had introduced herself to me by her first name (and I did likewise) Once, a fellow prof called the ex-P by his first name... the ex-P gave him the silent treatment... the ex-P didn't respond till the prof called him "Mr. T---." He didn't like being called by his name, even by his colleagues, and he didn't call others by their names. Well, that explains why whenever I've broken NC, it's been to call him by his REAL name. *ALWAYS.* Besides, I liked his first name&it bothered me that he wouldn't let me call him that. Even during the final D&D, he didn't use my real name. So cold and formal.

#13 Jun 5 - 6AM (Reply to #5)

onwithmylife

ruby01

the only time he called me by my name was when he was angry at me and said it very derisively.

#14 Jun 5 - 7AM (Reply to #6)

helldweller

not calling you by name

To this day, I'm not sure if this was a symptom of just not giving a crap what my name was, if it was a subconsious attempt at keeping his distance, or if he was deliberately trying to undermine my self esteem, but he said my name twice in four years, and both times after I told him how sad it made me that he never did. I read somewhere that a tactic in relating to a narcissist is to address him by his name as much as possible. It reinforces his self esteem and reduces fears of abandonment. It's supposed to make him warm up to you, relax his defenses and open him up to the relationship. NOT! I must have called him by his name a hundred times a day. I always addressed him by name--and by his proper name and his nicknames, to see if one appealed more to his vulnerability--but he just hated me more. In the end, I found out that he called none of the other women by name either, ever. Only "baby" or "honey."

#15 Jun 5 - 8PM (Reply to #8)

wacaet

mine called me angel or baby

mine called me angel or baby most of the time or "the wacaet" the ow was "the kim"

#16 Jun 5 - 4PM (Reply to #7)

Alibi_10

Names

Lol. ... mine called me by someone else's name more than once! !

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