5 months in...

So I’m five months into a relationship with a man and I’m
wondering if it’s time to cut and run.
It started out with me meeting a man that was almost too
good to be true. He was so sweet and charming and showered me with kindness,
little gifts, insisted on paying for everything, picking me up from work and
taking me into work on days when  stayed
at his house (I have no car but his place is accessible to the subway) .
 
To make a long story short… he was doing everything right.
It was so much that I  remember telling
my friends that he was too sweet and if he chilled out in the relationship in
the future even by half he’d still be the nicest guy I ever dated. I hurt
myself early on in the relationship and he went out of his way to take care of
me.
 
The only thing I remember at the beginning is that I thought
it was weird how much he talked about himself. I mean, he talked about himself
a lot. To be fair, he’s overcome many bad things to get where he is in life
today, so I kind of let it go thinking to myself that he’s just very proud and
grateful for attaining the success that he has had and he’s just different. I
kept telling myself that the world takes all types. I might be quiet and modest
but that not everyone has to be like me.
 
Regardless of that I was hooked. I was sucked in and made to
feel like a princess.
 
Fast forward about a month, and then the little things
started… I spent more and more time at his place. When I tried to cook dinner…
I always did it the wrong way and was instructed how it could be done
better.  I didn’t clean the countertops
well enough or I left the dishes in the sink too long before putting them in
the dishwasher. If I had to estimate…about 75% of the time I was always being
corrected. I tried to talk to him about things and let him know how it made me
feel. It always ended with me being the one ‘hurting his feelings.’
 
He would complain that I didn’t talk about myself enough so
when I would try to share a story about myself the conversation would always
turn to him. If I shared a sad story, he had an even sadder story to share
about himself. Sometimes I can’t even finish a story because he interrupts to
either 1. start discussing something he’s reading on his iPhone or 2. start in
with a story about himself. Point being: he doesn’t listen.
 
Regardless, I was already in love. He met my parents, I met
his things were progressing well in that respect. The little things weren’t
getting any better, though. We started having little tiffs here and there and
was I started to see was that I was always the one apologizing and trying to
make amends even if it was me who had approached him with hurt feelings.
Anything thing I said to him that could be construed as the slightest criticism
would cause a fight
 
He never did anything wrong and never felt the need to
apologize. When he got upset he would emotionally withdraw. I do believe that
you try and work through issues and try not to ever go to bed angry with your
partner. Not him… he is all about holding a grudge as long as possible and refusing
to speak about any issues. Literally everything is always my fault.
 
About 3 weeks ago we went out for dinner. We drove about 10
miles from his place and unsuccessfully tried to get tables at a few restaurants.
The wait was too long. I could see him getting upset. I got on my phone to look
for alternatives and that seemed to annoy him. We finally settled on a place
but he couldn’t find it using GPS. He became more annoyed.
 
I kept trying to tell him we could just go home but he was
annoyed and wouldn’t listen so I stopped talking. After a few minutes of him
getting upset and complaining about not finding it, I thought we were heading
back. He took a turn down a road and I asked him where we were going and he
lost it on me.
 
He began yelling at me telling me that he’s tired of always
trying to please me and it not being good enough. How he bends over backwards
for me and how I’m so ungrateful and he’s tired of it. How we can just go home
because he’s not going to waste any money on me for dinner, etc.
This seemed out of the blue and was so shocking to me. It
scared me. I tried to clam him down, apologized, did everything I could to stop
his tirade but he wouldn’t. I wound up literally sobbing in tears in the
passenger’s seat scared to death of the man flipping out next to me. He did not
seem to care one bit.
 
Anyway, we went back home and he didn’t speak with me the
rest of the night. I slept on the couch because I was so afraid of him. The
next day he actually apologized for losing his temper. I was shocked.
 
Anyway, just the other night we had another fight. I
expressed a need for more affection and he he got mad a me. I tried to
apologize and he just lost it. I so ungrateful for everything that he does. He
does x, y and z for me but I have the gall to say he’s not being affectionate
enough, etc., etc.
 
He slept on the couch. He didn’t speak to me in the morning
and when I was in the shower he took off telling me that he was ‘tired of
hearing how he doesn’t meet my needs and that he was going to suit himself. He
told me to go see what my friends were doing today.
 
I left him a kind and apologetic voicemail and text telling
him that I loved him and that he could call when he feels like talking. I then grabbed
some clothes and left. He sent me a text about 9 hours later saying good night.
 
There are so many little things I could add to this story
but I can’t even express them at the moment. I know that I’m not perfect and
there definitely have been time when I was more critical of him than I needed
to be and did legitimately hurt his feelings. But overall I feel I do
everything I can to make him happy. Any time he has ever asked for my support
I’ve been there. When he’s mentioned events that he’d like me to attend with
him, I’ve gone to every one even when it meant changing my schedule to show my
support. I’m always affectionate (it’s  my nature), I thank him for everything because I always appreciate the
rides he gives me or the fact that he keeps a stock of yogurt in his fridge for
me. I make sure to praise him because I know it makes him happy.
 
I’m just feeling so incredibly beat down lately. Always
having to watch what I say, lest I set him off. Keeping my opinions to myself,
lest I set him off. It’s exhausting.
 
After the fight the other night, I decided I really need to
take a step back from our relationship and see if this is healthy.
 
I’m thinking it’s not but I’m really not sure what to do
about it. He does little things that seem at odds with NPD, things that seem
motivated by true love and a desire to see me happy so I’m afraid to write him
off completely.
 
I just don’t know what to do.