The Path Forward Virtual Retreat Febuary 2021!



My idea for a book...

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Feb 12 - 5AM
Scotchy71
Scotchy71's picture

Ha

"Oh poor little Scotchy, narc broke her heart, killed her dream of moving to the states to help me help my Mom, have his children.....are you still milking sympathy from your friends?"... Yep, that hurt....he told me it was what he wanted too.....
Feb 12 - 5AM
nancyh
nancyh's picture

cherryblossom (book idea) -

cherryblossom (book idea) - "Bite me" - In and of itself I know it doesn't sound too bad but his response was to a reasonable question I had asked about something he said/did and it was the first time he had said something "mean" to me. I remember being so shocked that he would say something like that to me. It was the beginning of the inconsistencies in his behavior and one of the first times that I can remember that the mask fell.

Nan

Feb 14 - 5PM (Reply to #48)
apple
apple's picture

Yep Nancyh!

That's EXACTLY what I mean. The one thing that took your breath away. And bite me? I haven't heard that since I was like 12 years old.
Feb 12 - 3AM
apple
apple's picture

I just thought of another one...

~You will ALWAYS want ME!!! I will Fu** you on your weading day!!!!!!!!!!!! ~I hope your staying skinny for me. I don't like fat chicks.
Feb 14 - 5PM (Reply to #46)
apple
apple's picture

oops!

I meant wedding day. I'm not very good at checking for typos. lol
Feb 13 - 8AM (Reply to #45)
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

Cherry Blossom

It is funny in hindsight, but i think a lot of these Narcs have issues with heavier women, but who cares if they have potbellies, are blubbery or whatever,mine use to say he liked women who were not fat many times, here we go with the double standard life of the wackos...............
Dec 13 - 3PM
mystwoman
mystwoman's picture

The meanest, most cruel

The meanest, most cruel thing xnh said to me was, "Why don't you go die, and get it over with?" He said this when I was having a serious autoimmune health problem that was in a full-blown flare-up, and he was raging at me because I couldn't go camping. He told me I was holding him back and ruining his life because I was sick. I don't think I'll ever laugh about that one. On a more humorous note, xnh yelled at me in the middle of a restaurant on Valentine's Day because I'd been leaving the lid up on the toilet. One of his mommy's rules was that EVERYONE puts the lid down, and xnh decided that's how it would be at our house. So I went completely "rogue" and started leaving it up every time. Xnh actually COUNTED how many times I didn't put the lid down, and blasted me on Valentines Day with his "revelation". How romantic of him! lol.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

Dec 12 - 6PM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

"Words of my Perfect Teacher"

I know I'm using this sarcastically. The book is actually about a Buddhist monk (the one who directed "The Cup") So, here are some corkers from the ex-Psych professor- Calling me a "slut" whenever I wore a dress. I could dress like a nun or in a burqa, but he'd still call me a slut. "If you're so unhappy, why don't you kill yourself?" "You need to learn to be humble." "I'm going to hurt you." "I wish I could sue you!" (because I had told classmates about "Wittgenstein, Tolstoy and the Meaning of Life") "You're being stupid and irritating" (whenever I was happy) "Only dumb animals and stupid kids like you!" "How are the snot-nosed kids?" (when I was volunteering at a local school) "You are encroaching on my territory." (when I'd inquire about Wittgenstein, philosophy) "I feel more comfortable around men." "I love the thought of you, weeping and abandoned." "She is going to a therapist to learn how to manage her feelings."
Dec 12 - 7PM (Reply to #39)
apple
apple's picture

omg!!!!!!!!

I don't know how you survived all that abuse!!! He is such a CREEP!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dec 16 - 12AM (Reply to #42)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

But wait, there's more....the infamous Idiotic Grin

Saying I had an "idiotic grin" whenever I was happy. He said it to my face, he also said it to his circle of male followers.
Dec 13 - 8PM (Reply to #41)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Survivor

The ironic kicker is that the summer after the D&D was the first season of SURVIVOR. I certainly felt like one! Sad to say, this ex-P is still teaching. One of my friends said of his tenure "don't envy his ill-gotten gain." And, because I wrote my senior essay on Augustine... he NEVER wrote on Augustine again (he did publish an article about Augustine a year after the D&D,but it was probably in the pipeline before my senior year)... so I was powerful enough to taint something for him.
Dec 12 - 7PM (Reply to #40)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

How I dodged the bullet...

I don't know how I managed to save myself from dating and/or having sex with him. In the beginning, he was attractive, and I would've slept with him despite his sliminess. By my senior year, he was drinking A LOT in front of students, and he had gotten plump. He's still a teacher. He got tenure 3 years after the D&D.... one wonders if the fact he was getting NS from his parents, his twins and his wife somehow saved his butt... Besides, if he had gotten fired... it would've made me a target. He would've blamed me. It sickens me that he's STILL teaching. I was so ANGRY during the final D&D that suicide attempts were out of the question. I wanted to be alive and well to stick it to him. I would've passed him the bitter cup of failure, and I was NOT going to let it pass from him. He could've sweat blood, and I wouldn't have cared.
Dec 12 - 4PM
blueeyes
blueeyes's picture

Ready?

2 days after my son was born I found a bill he ran up and I questioned him. He lied. I told him I knew it was him and I can call the company and prove it. He sat there holding the baby, ignorant. I had the phone on my ear and just when I asked the Company to email me the signed receipt, he smacked my face and phone flew and broke a picture. I fell but I stood up fast and straight and said, "anger breeds guilt, loser." He said: "you are a fat ugly bitch" That one is the jaw dropper. I gave birth 72 hours ago and I wasn't even fat! Huh?
Dec 12 - 6PM (Reply to #37)
Ava
Ava's picture

Ah f**k me blueeyes

Definitely tell that to the judge on Fri. Gees. Its f**king awful but I cannot say how IMPRESSED I am at your reaction. Absolute spine of steel you have. Ava xx

Ava

Dec 12 - 6PM (Reply to #36)
apple
apple's picture

Blueeyes

What a freaking monster!!!!! I don't even know what to say. Actually, a few things come to mind but I don't want to get in trouble =) So proud of you for taking a stand for you and your children!!
Dec 12 - 4PM (Reply to #35)
jen79
jen79's picture

yours

does not only look like a creepy psycho, he IS a creepy psycho. With his cold reptilian stare. I am so happy you are away from him
Dec 12 - 4PM (Reply to #33)
Briseis
Briseis's picture

Blue, put that sh*t in your

Blue, put that sh*t in your addendum to the judge!!! Every single one of those things!! She said "be specific". How much more specific can you get than this? (((hugs)))
Dec 12 - 4PM (Reply to #34)
blueeyes
blueeyes's picture

Brisies

Ugh, I did. She wants the violent clincher. I found the voice notes. I'm trying. No lawyer. Yet.
Dec 12 - 3PM
Amazed
Amazed's picture

They Project

Oftentimes, when we think about it, the hurtful things they say to us, are actually their problems. They just say things pointing the finger at us, and we are like WTF? For example, exPsychopath/N said to a colleague, oh, I have to do such and such or I will be taking sides... His statements didn't make any sense. Talk about word salad. These guys create all the drama, and some how get others to play along. It is playing in their drama, where they alone create the rules, no one else will ever know the rules, and others always lose. Family, their innocent children, included. It is so sad. I do not envy the people in their life.
Dec 12 - 3PM
imabloke
imabloke's picture

its the pits...

Stick and stones may break my bones... but words can hurt forever... The hurtful things that they've said and not even a 'sorry'. It really is just the arse end of humanity.. what a fucking bunch of emotional bullies... sorry just having a rant...
Dec 12 - 6PM (Reply to #30)
apple
apple's picture

I know!!

The only positive thing I think about is how we escaped and made it out alive. I would rather be by myself then have people that do/will hurt me in my life.
Dec 12 - 3PM
Briseis
Briseis's picture

My fave

"I guess I just felt sorry for you."
Feb 12 - 4AM (Reply to #28)
Scoop
Scoop's picture

Eww Briseis that was a

Eww Briseis that was a running theme with my narc "i guess i just felt sorry for you " , "you love me way more than i love you " , "i guess i am happy with you only 30% of the time ", "i want you go find someone else so i can be free from you ", "why do you still keep coming round it must be horrible for you " . .. "i didnt say i wanted to be friends i just thought i wouldnt close the door to you " WTF ? sorry im on a roll "i thought i would give you a hand because i know you dont have many friends " "i got mine thanks " eww , "the trouble with you scoop is ...... " then he would spend an hour telling me how he is so sorted and im so rubbish...."its youre fault you got pregnant YOU slept with ME" i can laugh at that one now ... so many more but the best one "im not a controle freak "
Dec 12 - 3PM (Reply to #24)
Jean
Jean's picture

oh, that is classic

What a flaming piece of crap! I'll tell ya, I've never known anyone like my N who I wanted to punch so much. What a hilarious thing to say - even though it's so incredibly hurtful. I mean, who the heck does he think he is? I wonder if these guys save up these lines, and then see how effective they are, and re-use them over and over again. It seems like if you really wanted to hurt someone then you would just use the lines that get the most effect, statistically that is. Which might explain why insulting someone's boobs is used so frequently - because it often works. I think I am going to start storing up my own lines.
Dec 12 - 3PM (Reply to #25)
Briseis
Briseis's picture

I bought it hook line and

I bought it hook line and sinker too :( I owned my own home free and clear, had a very successful career as an RN, and had many other remarkable accomplishments. Just kind of normal things that demonstrated that I was a survivor and fairly courageous. He was homeless (I only discovered this later) had two outstanding arrest warrants, and a long history of drug use, meth manufacturing and didn't have a pot to piss in. But he felt SORRY for me. My ass.
Dec 12 - 6PM (Reply to #27)
Jean
Jean's picture

Brieseis, you are hilarious

ROFLOL. . . . oh, if you could the N I "sexually harassed" at work: five feet tall, balding, chubby, dresses like - well it's hard to describe, let's just say overalls are a staple of his wardrobe. . .
Dec 12 - 3PM (Reply to #26)
Amazed
Amazed's picture

LOL!!! Briseis you are Awesome!!

Awesome, Thank God you eventually saw this guy for what he was. You are so incredibly brave. Amen.
Dec 12 - 12PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Favorite

"you are creating something in your head that doesn't exist" " you are trying to chage me" " I adore you like my dog" oh the list is sooooo long. Oxox
Dec 12 - 3PM (Reply to #21)
Jean
Jean's picture

great thread - laughter is healing

In responding to my attempts to get clarity around why he had flirted with me heavily for months then seemed repulsed by the idea of sex . . . So, _____, just out of curiosity, why don't you want to get together? "Your're married. . .and you're not Jewish" Hunh??? I still can't figure this out. I think he thought it would hurt my feelings. And, said under his breath in a nasty voice, "oh, I'll take you for a ride, alright." I did a double take with the last one, because it really didn't make sense - it wasn't funny. "I wasn't aware there was any animosity" - said while seething with hatred.
Dec 12 - 4PM (Reply to #22)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Great idea!

While married to him.... "I can relax on the weekends when you have your period because there's no pressure to have sex with you." While separated... "You know, I'm glad we're getting a divorce. I never did understand why someone would want to have sex with the same person more than once. I mean, been there, done that already. What's the point?