Do Narcs stalk?

Oh yes, many of them share the stalking tendencies. I know mine is. Scary stuff!

Read my story! Yes they do!

Yes, they've been known to stalk. I would recommend changing your locks and doing anything else you feel will make you more safe. My xnh did have some stalking tendencies right after the D&D and divorce. He would hang outside the building where we work so that he could follow me into the building using the excuse of "just saying hi". It was creepy to me that whenever I got out of my car, xnh would promptly appear. If I made any noise or walked past his office leaving work at night, he also would suddenly appear using the excuse of "being friendly". I started altering my arrival and departure times to be more unpredictable to xnh, and I begin exiting doors in the building where I wouldn't have to pass his office (his office is right next door to mine). I did very much feel harassed by xnh. At my home, I also had a few incidences where xnh would suddenly appear in my front yard unannounced. I found this very unnerving because my dogs knew him, and didn't warn me of his presence. It freaked me out that I would look out my window and his truck would just be in my driveway. There was also one occurrence where I had allowed xnh onto my property to remove a storage shed after the divorce was final. I legally did not have to do this, and was merely trying to be "nice". I told him to come get the shed when I knew that I would not be present. Immediately after he'd moved his stuff out, I had changed all the locks on my property, and repeatedly asked xnh for my keys back. He just kept ignoring me, and I changed the locks so I was SURE I was the only one with access to my house. I'm glad I did because on this particular night when xnh was getting the shed, he waited until I came home (several hours). It was dark out, and as I came up to my front door, xnh came blasting around the corner of my house where he'd been waiting for me. He yelled at me for changing my locks, and was angry because he'd tried to get into my house while I was gone. If I hadn't changed my locks, he wouldn't have just scared the crap out of me on my front porch in the dark. He would have either been IN my house waiting for me, or would have taken my property without my permission (namely my mixer - I've already posted my mixer-napping attempt story on this site). I would highly recommend changing your locks. I actually routinely do this whenever I move into a new residence. At least then I KNOW that I'm the only person with keys. Do whatever you feel you need in order to make sure that you are safe. Beefing up your security will give you peace of mind, and you'll KNOW you're doing what you need to protect yourself. In my opinion, it's ALWAYS best to error on the side of caution. It's much better to be safe than sorry. Hugs.

The first narc I got involved with, which was a much more serious relationship than the recent one I've had with a narc...he did stalk me. He would tell me he was going to stalk me though. lol He was a piece of work. He would tell me...when you hear a car revving outside your bedroom window...it'll be me. When you see a black mustang in the parking lot at work, it'll be me. It didn't scare me, really. It was just annoying. But, yes they most certainly can stalk. The ignoring/silent treatment is not the treatment of choice by all narcs. Many like to stalk...because it shows they don't care about your boundaries. It's just another way of them telling you that you don't matter. What's funny...is that I didn't even know he was a narcissist, until coming here to this forum, to find answers relating the narc number two! lol I classified him as an abuser, the first guy. Which as we know, stems from narcissism. Just my two cents. If you feel more comfortable changing the locks...do so. It doesn't cost much, and it would be worth the peace of mind. Be careful! {{hugs}}

I think if you have any concerns whatsoever about it then yes, definitely change your locks (assuming you can afford to). Do whatever you need to do now to feel safe, relaxed and secure - especially in your own home which should be your sanctuary. This is all part of taking care of yourself and who cares if anyone else thinks differently (especially him). It's funny you mentioned about taking your break-ups seriously and he didn't. I had the same experience with mine. We had a few mini "break-ups" during our relationship and each time I thought it was over, after the pain of a D&D, why wouldn't I think that? Well, as soon as it suited him to win me back again (which I mistakenly took for meaning he really did care and loved me), he would then just describe those times as slowing down for awhile, taking space blah blah blah. They are all so much alike. Journey on...

You bet they do! Mine called my work numerous times a day and hung up when I answered. He called even more if I did not answer. He made up no less than THREE fake email addresses to contact me through my work website. He called my cell phone with a restricted number, begging me not to hang up. (I would hang up every time.) He would email me, before I blocked every email address he made up, to ask if he could see me on his "trip to my state." He reached his stalker peak when he called my work 40, yes, 40 times in one day after seeing a photo of me and my new boyfriend on facebook. I thought I would be safe because we lived in different states. Not so. I have since left that job, bought a different vehicle, and we are planning to move to another state. I would like to add that if I was not receptive to his attempts to contact me, he became very verbally abusive.

I think you need to do whatever you need in order to feel safe and comfortable in your home. I can only speak from my own experience. He and I live only a few blocks away from each other. He used to stop by all the time while walking his dog. That was fine. But other times, I would see him walking by and he wouldn't stop. He never knew I saw him. I would tuck it in the back of my mind as "odd". When things were getting worse and we were spending less time together, I would catch him doing it more. It's been over a year since he pushed me aside and since March that I've run into him anywhere. (I do my best to make sure that doesn't happen.) I only know of one time that he's done it since then and the only reason I knew was because my dog went crazy and ran to the back door to watch for him to come through the back gate. Of course, that doesn't mean he's not walking past. But neighbors have commented on how they don't see him around any more, so I am hoping he's not.

They frequently stalk. You could put money on it, with most of them.

Hi Happy1, I think anyone is capable of becoming a stalker, N's are capable of all sorts of behavoir, would you have considered yourself a stalker prior to interacting with him? Probably not, but you did it, so sure, he could also. You sound as though you may have a touch of PTSD, to include paranoia, after such an experience with a narc it's no wonder, take the necessary steps to protect yourself and your home either way, best wishes. stay~striving

After the final D&D, the ex-Psych professor was asking about my off-campus apartment and my new phone number... I didn't give him either. It was a good thing. Even tho he did sabotage my teacher education program at UNM (he was one of my personal references), he could NOT find me... despite being in the same city. When I lost my teaching internship, I did tell one of my professors about it... but NOT the ex-P. When I left New Mexico, I did not tell ANYONE, not even the people I trusted. During the final D&D, I had seen him slam chairs and he had a propensity for violence (as evidenced by his "war and war and war and war" essay that's still online) When I congratulated him on being engaged, I got full-on Narc rage. When I left, I didn't disclose any personal info. I cared about protecting myself; I didn't care about him.