Definition Narcissist- BIG DUMB BULLY

11 posts / 0 new

#1 Dec 23 - 6AM

ImStrong

Definition Narcissist- BIG DUMB BULLY

I have noticed why a N would call any of us there gf or claim there in a relationship with us..I feel because its so they can bully us..N are big dumb bullies who made the decission that if they say there in a relationship with us we will stay..which worked out well..bullies like repeative victims..like the bully who always takes the lunch money from that same skinny nerdy kid..or knocks out his lunch box out of his hand everyday..

The bully likes a relationship with one person they can bully repeatively ..

Bully in N terms is the term D&D we all know and love..

When we are in the devalue and discars stage we are being bullied..

You must learn this well..N xo mot love or care or miss you..they bully you..miss bulling you ..café about bullying you..and lastly love bulling you..

It is easier when your in a relationship with hip because now you are not going aywhere because he called you his so called gf..so you fight and fight for that tittle and stay..

Think about a bully when you think about N..bullies bully to fell good..N bully devalue and discard to feel to feel good..

They are only bullies..

When you are faced with a bully you would stand up for your self right..so now you must stand up for yoursel by NC and Showing the bully who the Fck is boss

Don't let these N D&D other words bully you..Go Nc asap

Bullies get a high and a sense of strenght when they bully there victims a sence of empowerment..take back that bullies power he stole from you and go NC..

Be independent and strong don't be fooled by the bullies abuse

#2 Dec 23 - 10AM

StillHurting

Mine would blow up at me....

I think he could take it out on me because he tried to keep everything so cool at home with his wife and kids. Sometimes he would call, and I could tell right at the start of the call the he was angry and was using a different tone, etc. I feel he wants to shield everything from his kids so he doesn't rage much at wife at home, but it sure is okay to scream and hang up on me. Kind of a bully, yes!

#3 Dec 23 - 7AM

Amazed

Bullies, that is it!

Very accurately stated. Here is a good link containing advice on how to deal with bullies. http://www.bullyonline.org/action/action.htm

#4 Dec 23 - 6AM

helldweller

bullies

This is so, so true. They are just like pussy bullies taking the skinny kid's lunch money. Only our "lunch money" is our pride, dignity and self worth. Just like those kids, every day we go to school and say, "Im not gonna give it to him today" but we always do. But, luckily for us on here, we get stronger, just like the kid who starts secretly lifting weights after school and then one day, WHAMMO!==beats the crap out of the bully once and for all. ImStrong said something that really struck me: about "fighting for" the title of "girlfriend." I realize now that he only called me that because he knew I wanted to be his girlfriend. "Ok, you're my girlfriend." Just as he always used to say, "Ok, we'll break up" or "Ok, get married" or "Ok, we'll have chicken for dinner." Didn't matter to him; he'd saying anything you wanted to hear as long as it made things easier for him.

#5 Dec 23 - 6AM

onwithmylife

IMSTRONG

good post, his first wife told me once he was a bully in school and I saw this in action a few years ago when he tried to bully a neighbor he did not like for whatever strange reason and the cops had to come to settle it, so pathetic, their self esteem is so deadly low, it is how they' puff'themselves up.after so many years my exnar did not even refer to me as his girlfriend and when we were ever introduced it was by my name , not here is my girfriend, onwithmylife. He even called me his lady friend to someone I use to work for, what type of crap is that??!!! Bullying gives them a false sense of power over someone else because they have NO POWER over themselves and always feel out of control, that is WHY THEY have to be in CONTROL.their inner world is in turmoil, you are so right no contact stops them dead in their tracks of bullying you.................

#6 Dec 23 - 6AM (Reply to #2)

helldweller

onwithmylife

He only called me "girlfriend" but did not refer to me that way to anyone else. He took his foster kid and my daughter to work with him once and introduced them as "my son and my neighbor's daughter." "MY NEIGHBOR'S DAUGHTER." I wasn't even his "friend"--just his "neighbor." I realize now that it was easy to pass me off as meaningless to other women, because I lived next door. Her? Oh, she's just my neighbor. Must have been so gratifying when his child brought up my name to the OW. Who's she? "Oh, just my neighbor. Her daughter and my son play together." Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

#7 Dec 23 - 6AM (Reply to #3)

onwithmylife

helldweller

I do not mean to make light of it, but now that i am finally recovering and moving on, it seems so absurd and ridiculous as to how these men act in the real world, your 'his neighbor',how gratifying to hear those magic words!! it reminds me of once when we were together or so i thought, he told me that an fellow employee at work, female, had asked him to got o a bluegrass festival and look at him in disbelief, and say i thought we were a couple, he said nothing and did not go. this is ALL so ABSURD, these men i mean!! STUNTED emotional developement, ALL THE WAY..................

#8 Dec 23 - 6AM (Reply to #4)

helldweller

onwithmylife

I love how he just didn't answer you. I am sure he had no idea what you were talking about. A "couple?" A what? What does that mean? I'm sure he would have had to look it up. Oh! and I forgot to mention that he pretends the foster child is his own kid. I think he really believes it. He even tells him stories about when he was born! So twisted and sick!

#9 Dec 23 - 6AM (Reply to #5)

onwithmylife

helldweller

You are a witty woman, they are such fools, it makes me laugh and I always need a good laugh. What you said about his foster child treating him as his own kid, that is PROOF that they live in their own little worlds. You will laugh over this one, some years ago, after he moved out of my place, and took some of my things with him, hey, why not, what was mine became his,like it or not. well anyway we hooked up again 9 months later and i am over at his place and see an object that i know is mine and he took it , so for amusement sake, i innocently ask him where he got it, it was a fossil piece of stone, well he made up some story that I had to bite my tongue, he said in a garage sale, I believe,I said nothing more, there was my proof of his mental state.............

#10 Dec 23 - 7AM (Reply to #6)

helldweller

onwithmylife

So classic! Especially since he didn't remember! Mine brought over a plate of cookies a few years ago (I still have the plate) that he said he bought from a woman at work who was trying to start a catering business. He felt sorry for her, he said, and ordered some of her stuff. He went on and on about how her husband had died and she was trying to make ends meet, especially since her son had just been accepted to engineering school, etc etc. Turns out the cookies were sent to him by the OW as part of a care package, and he just brought them over when he came to dinner. Of course, he not only had to lie but also spin the lie so he looked like a caring, generous soul. So freaking classic. Did you get your fossil back? I,m giving him the OW's cake plate back as a Christmas present LOL. I am sure hell have no idea, but I'm hoping she'll see it in his house and comment on it. I wonder where he'll say he got it? LOL

#11 Dec 23 - 7AM (Reply to #7)

onwithmylife

Helldweller

I am sorry to admit that I did not ask for the fossil back, see I was so so enthralled with the man, even though the thought occur to me to state the obvious and say," you know that is my fossil that you took from my place,." I wanted so badly to say that but did not know what his reaction would be, in other words, I was too frightened to speak up, not knowing HOW he would react, so let it go and figured he needed it more than me. I got my affirmation nevertheless, still not knowing anything about what he had at the time. THAT cookie incident is a classic, love it. It is great emailing with you, so reassuring words cannot express it!!!THEY DO believe their own lies, amazing isn't it...remember the classic poem, oh what lies we weave when we pratice to deceive...Narcs wrote the book on that one....

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