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#1 Nov 2 - 6AM
Anonymous (not verified)
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NC

I just want to say good morning to everyone - I haven't been on as often because I'm trying to heal and sometimes I feel that all the emotions on the board are overwhelming and painful.

I started out really strong, then took a nosedive.

I will be back more often because this Board has been my strength and my lifeline - it's not any of you it's me.

I did want to say however, how important NC is to mantaining sanity and moving forward.

I am stronger and I feel myself getting there. I still so much want to be a part of this cause - raise awareness.

Ladies, each and every one of us are deserving of love. It doesn't necessarily have to be from a man.

I've noted I have also repeated the patterns in the choices I've made with friends.

I guess this is a random posting - I just want to say, for those of you who are new - start NC ASAP. It truly is the only way to go. It won't be easy but in time you'll see.

This past Sunday I made seven weeks.

Keep growing, learning and striving. Try not to let the Narcs and their insanity consume you. It's not yours to own. Put that energy into yourselves.

Be alive, enlightened and blessed. Make this the Winter of your Content!

Hugs!

Nov 2 - 2PM
Used
Used's picture

michelle115

7 weeks.....YAH!!!...well done...and i love your great posts....
Nov 2 - 1PM
ewa
ewa's picture

I totally agree with you -

I totally agree with you - there is no other way then NC! Congratulations on 8 weeks, well done :)
Nov 2 - 11AM
broken23
broken23's picture

Great job Michelle, 7 weeks

Great job Michelle, 7 weeks is awesome. Many more weeks to go!! Ms. Vulcan is right, it gets easier as time goes. I myself dont come here as often anymore but come in as needed. I have too been NC now almost 7 months....and i get better and better each month. I do things for myself and I find a lot more moments where i am happy and hopeful and i do look forward to a new life without him, and have accepted what he really is. I struggle with the closure part, still desiring a apology, acknowledgement, anything really to know i mattered and that really still hurts and gets me down. Any ideas on how to accept no closure will ever come?
Nov 2 - 9AM
CarolKittyGale (not verified)
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Amen to that and well done

Amen to that and well done for staying NC for 7 weeks!!!
Nov 2 - 7AM
onwithmylife
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michele

You are doing so well after such a short time, you need to congratulate yourself! It took me nearly 2 years and only this board and a vile letter from him seeing his mental disorder getting worse before my eyes, which has helped me finally get over the hump and be able to move on. I use to have so many up and down days, as you know, I lost count myself. I still kept the hope and door slightly ajared until only a month or so ago when I hit rock bottom.That is when I got the letter and with help from you and other board members I actually saw how twisted the man;'s mind is and there was NOTHING I could do about it, except save my sanity and move on.I have never in my life given up on anything or anyone before as i have this man..to quote Kenny Rodgers, know when to hold em and know when to fold em........
Nov 2 - 7AM
moonshine
moonshine's picture

michelle

I was wondering about you. I also felt the need to just be somedays and not come here. I think its a cycle. I am going back and forth but somethings hit my head and those are helping me. I stopped going to my pysch as it wasnt helping and he doesnt understand whats hurting me. I tried calling other pyschs but i dont think they understand this either. I am just going to BE for a while and see what my hearts tells me. I MISS YOU....I hope you be well...do drop in when you can...
Nov 2 - 7AM
MsVulcan500
MsVulcan500's picture

Michele,

First of all, congrats on 7 weeks!! It does get easier, doesn't it? And things become so much clearer. I'm about 14 months out, 10 months NC. And I can tell you, I honestly don't care what he is doing, how he is doing, who he is doing, any of it. He's out of my life and as I go on living it, it becomes less important what he thinks of me. NC is really the crux of getting your life back and getting back to you!! That is your goal. To get yourself back. You're going to have these setbacks, don't get me wrong. You will go back and forth and still have doubts of whether you are right about him or not. But you know in your gut that you are right. Just keep working through it, and these downslides will become less frequent and each one shouldn't be as bad as the last (not as deep or last as long). This is all progress and you are doing wonderfully! Just keep moving forward (thanks Betty) and you will be thriving in no time.