To realize

I am beginning to realize that a man who goes out of his way to hurt one woman, can't be a good man to another woman. That's final. Sound simple right? But so hard to grasp when you are the hurt one... Sure we can all act like jerks, but what these men do, OMFG!

My ex is now together with a women, I told you before, she is older than me, has a good career going, and I thought that was enough, and better than me... They live in the same neigborhood as I, and today I saw them together for the first time, she actually looks like me, petite and with dark curly hair, just pailer and older than I... But who cares!

The last few days I am beginning to realize how sick this man actually is. Extremely physical and psychological abusive, in spite of his status etc... and charm.

He told me his new girlfriend is the cousin of his friend's wife, and that her twi sister is married to another of his friend, so I guess he will never be physical abusive to her (thats probably too dangerous) AND that made me so sad at first (I am no better than the next) But now it doesn't bother me that much, because who REALLY wants to be with a man who almost killed his ex? Only a girl who doesn't know any better. I was that girl. Lucky me I am 29, I feel so sorry for that woman, because she actually looked so sweet..

AND now I realize he has not changed while being with her, he still (a month ago) did the best he could to hurt me (don't actually know if he believes his own lies) telling me he only took me for my looks, he knows better now and bla bla bla, the one thing that actually does still hurt is that he told me how hard it was for him living with a girl with bulimia. Yep, I did suffer from bulimia in my early 20's...stupid me telling him that, At the time I met him, I did not have any form of eating disorder, neither when I was with him, and neither after, but today he is telling everybody how sick I am, and that bulimia made me abusive and so on and on,

So today I changed my phonenumber, I, with all in me, never ever wish to talk to him again, He no longer has any place in my heart. I don't even feel angry today, just sad that people can be so disordered and mean, a bit glad that he and all of his friend and his world is no longer a part of mine.

After 7-8 months after intense suffering I never thougt I would be able to feel this way. If I can, I know all of you can, and BTW I am so grateful for the support in here!