How many of you never heard from the Narc Again after the D&D?

If only I could be so lucky.

How many of us "never" heard from the N again after D & D? Well,how long is NEVER and how would we know? ( provided all avenues of contact from him are blocked and unless a letter comes flapping through the letterbox or he knocks at the door in person... ) Mine D & D'd me 1st time in June 08 personally when I exposed him to him 'Soon to be X Wife his friends and his family' after 3 and a half years of him flip-flapping ( and I'd known him for 9yrs! )This was followed by an email that said we should not contact each other and would I please forgive him for not being the man he thought he was! One year to the day of that email ( June 09 ) I got.. Hi Bubbles how are you? and I exposed him again to the same peeps as before... then nothing...until Sept 09 and he sucked me straight back in for 8 weeks of turmoil, confusion hurt and more D & D. At the last count I had an email wishing me a happy birthday ( 25th Nov 09 ) and have heard nothing since. Worse thing for me is he only lives about 4 miles away and I know at some point we will see each other.. somewhere. If thy eye offend thee.. pluck the fukka out!! LOL Bubbles xx

My exN would not accept no for an answer after I found out he was sleeping with his exgirlfriend last summer. I eventually gave in. This last time around (there were several), he became very verbally abusive and I basically refused to see him. He hooked back up with his ex and another woman. I told his family and friends what he'd done, repeatedly, which apparently caused quite the narcissistic injury because then I became the crazy one. I had to email him about work he did on my computer (fixed it and installed remote tracking software...geez) and he responded by saying if I contacted him again he would file harassment charges. Computer issue is resolved and I changed the locks on my house. So as of this weekend, he no longer can log me on my computer. So at this point, he will either give up or possibly try to contact me to see if I know for sure it was him on my computer. I would like to think he will not contact me at any point in the future but his pattern is to do so when he doesn't have a current supply oosing out of his pores. Pattern with me, his exgirlfriend (for years) and his ex-wife (for years though she won't have any contact with him anymore now). I, too, went through a time when I would look him up on the internet and wanted to have contact with him - though I didn't want the relationship and all the lies and cheating that went with it. It has been over 3 months since I've seen him and it really has been wonderful. I mean WONDERFUL. Some N's, I think, exit out of the picture because we start exhibiting the effects of all their abuse and they are ABOVE having to deal with any of it. I know in this guys case, he waits and when his victim (usually ex's) are back on their feet, feeling confident again and have healed (for the most part) from all his deceit and betrayal, he swoops back in and tries to lure them again. I don't know if they are ever really done with someone - especially if they think there is a chance they can get even an ounce of supply - and again, an ounce meaning a good ounce or a bad ounce. Unless you expose them. Then you get the wrath of their rage.

My XNB has never contacted me EVER. And now looking back that is a good thing. But I remember seraching for him online looking for signs of him everywhere. I did'nt find any. Not because I loved him or wanted him back-for answers and for closure, to hold responsible for what he had done to me. One question always came to me WHY?????? Now I don't need the answers. I found my own peace and accept what has happened to me and moved through everything I needed to. I dread the thought of ever seeing him again, because of his nature and I listed him on an exposure site. I hope I never see him again-I realise now, that this man was VERY dangerous in the most toxic way. I am happy that he discarded me!anymore time exposed to him would have destroyed me.

only called me during the initial breakup period when he didnt want me to tell the ow and his family what i knew and found out. he even booked a ticket to come see me and said it was the right thing to do. but when i went ahead and told the other girl anyway, after that he smeared me and my reputation and made me out to be phycho girl who couldnt get over him. since then i never heard from him. he blocked me from his facebook and chat and all that online stuff before i blocked him. it hurt at first considering he is the one who cheated and lied and lied and lied. But perhaps its a blessing in disguise. i like many others cant deny i wish he would call (not because i want him back), but just to be validated and then tell him off!

My ex calls me every six months or so. I didn't realize until recently that he was an N. There is no chance of him hoovering me back in. I just ask him how his daughter is and he tells me how shitty his life is and that's about it. The last time he called, I ignored him. This last N just texted me last Tuesday. I ignored it and he started berating me, so I changed my number. He is cut out of my life for good. Just thinking about him pisses me off. I'm not sure who dumped who. I was trying to break it off with him from the beginning and he kept hoovering me back in. His mask slipped really early, allowing for me to see his true colors. All I know is that he is very concerned about leaving things good because he "See's no justice" in the fact that I called him out on all of his crap. He wasn't able to fool me and he's freaking out. D*ickhead.

My ex N after a terrible D&D a year and a half ago did send me 2 emails saying believe it or not he wondered how i was doing but he didn't wantes to start conversations with me again....then i called him to ask about the money he owed me ...He said he was broken,because now the mother of his children get the taxes back because she has full custody of them....He got angry as always and said i should live him alone and he thinks he is gay....9 months ago,i saw him on Skypefor the first time in 10 months after d&D we used that acout exclusevely for the 2 of us,he told me that he was talking to a woman that was just like me only not a psycho bitch like me!he got angry again,NC totally on me ...i broke NC a couple of times the only thing a got was more confusion,lies,and humiliation....The only good thing about that is that i saw his Real evil and now know for sure he is very very sick and disturbed,a psychopat with NO FEELINGS,HE IS NOT HUMAN is really scary to think how evil he is...The first time he showed his picture to me on the internet he said:I will show you my UGLY face....i saw a beautiful Afro American man in his forties,with a beautiful smile....Now i know what a devil in disguise looks like...I think then was the first and the last time he told me the true....Yeap he disapeared from my life ....

I told him didn't want to be friends and that's the end of it. He's already moved on, placing new online ads and circling his collection of lady friends. I wont sleep with him and I wont work on any of his projects anymore, so there's nothing left! Good bye.

The way my ex-N and I parted ways a decade ago was with me saying,"You hurt my feelings" (and asking for an apology), and his "You acted inappropriately. Drop the subject" (or something to that effect) Last time I ever saw him in person. Last time I ever spoke with him. A hell of a way to separate. With ADULTS, you part ways wishing each other well. You want the other person to succeed and find a measure of happiness. With my ex-N, I wished him well, wanted him to be happy with his fiancee... and all I got was Narc rage. That's the "closure" I got. No apologies for the public humiliation, the routine disrespect, the outright cruelty and verbal abuse.

...My stbxbnp left his family 6 months ago, for a girl he dated in college? We're talking....... 35 years plus? He's old and ugly, and so is she..... I think they're a perfect pair. T hey're both predators with serious , and I do mean serious, mental disorders. They definitely deserve each other........ She hasn't moved in with him yet, and I don't know why? She lives a couple hours away.....guess that gives him lots of time to pick another married woman at his new location....he's so needy, he needs at least one back up reserve! Needs more attention than a small child, so there's a mommy Madonna, and then he has to have deviant sex with a whore.....oh yeah, and the new OW used to be the whore! Boy, is she in for a surprise! LMAO

i heard from him 1 mnth anfter breaking up we talked about 45 min. he promised hed call me the next day and that he was not going to disappear and that was that!!!! He did exactly what he said he would not! That was our last contact 11 and a half mnths ago. I did try to contact him either because I figured its time to have some self respect!! Thank God hes not into computers so I dont have to worry about him having a Fb or anything else. I can check his kids pages but this would serve me no positive purpose so I stay away! I wonder if he will ever contact me again? The hardest thing for me has definetly been how easily he erased me like I never exsisted for 7 yrs but yet he did not erase that x cheating bitch from our lives! Somedays I wish hed call others I tell him to go to HELL..lol!! I feel a lil sense of humor coming back...yayayy!! smileyfacepr

My situation was the perfect out for the N, who cannot take responsibility for anything. We got into a fistfight, finally, when I got sick of his text messages, lying and cheating after three and a half years. His supervisors told him "You can't have any contact with her until this over." Done. Dead. "Sorry, baby. I can't talk to you anymore." While I literallly couldn't move from the bruises and was busy talking to detectives after making the police report, he was away the whole weekend and came home with a tan.

He tryed last week to contact me (i guess indirectly) but that is his way , he was testing the water to see how he would be recieved . he was recieved with silence Yey me ! he has invited me to a meeting on thursday and i will not be there HA . I expect him to contact me again ,such is the nature of the beast .Its when i ask my self what does he want from me , my prediction is he thinks i dont want to see him because i am too upset and seeing him will remind me of what i cant have ( a situation which is liquid gold suply to him ) The real reason i dont want to see him is he is a compleat piece of shit that i wouldnt spit on if he was on fire .I keep haveing fantisys where i am killing him with a cricket bat , this is another reason i keep nc as i seriously worry what i would do to him if i saw him , thank god guns are not legal in England because i would have got myself one by now ..Did you know in France they have a sepecial set of sentancing for crimes of passion ,much more lenient . Lets all invite our narcs to an all expences holiday to Paris .. they would never suspect a thing .... Scoop x

I was at the spot you are a few months ago. In November,after trying to contact him to return my money and failing miserably, I gave up and left it alone. Only then to see him and his new GF at a new year's party. At that point I asked for my money again after telling his GF what kind of person he really was. She was brainwashed so no effect and no money even though she promised they would send it. Um yeah so didn't hear from him since Nov and last Tuesday he called and left me a voicemail saying that he needs a resolution to this and wants us to go our separate ways because his interviewer found the dating psychos profile I had put up of him in Feb. Haha! So the phone call was of course ONLY for him and he said I had caused him enough embarassment and broken up his family (had sent a letter to his mom/sis telling them EVERYTHING he never told them). Um...so my response, after being D&D'd for 6 months...ignore ignore ignore. I always wondered what my response would be if he ever called or I saw him. Now I know that I am strong enough to ignore because I never want to go back to how I felt after he gave me the silent treatment. Lucky for him I had taken the profile off a few days before he called (ironic!) out of my own healing process and basically not caring enough to "promote" him as a psycho online. Somehow I feel he was flattered I was still caring enough to smear him. I didn't want him to have that pleasure. In his vm, he even said he would deposit any amount of money into my account, just so I could stop exposing him. Ha!! What about all those times I asked him for my money? And now he wants to bribe me? What about all those times I asked you to call me? You think I'm gonna call you because you said please? What a dork!! He sounds kind of scared, which is just what I was hoping for. I hope he is always scared that I might be up to something in further exposing him. NC is the best way girls. I had to wait 6 months and I broke NC numerous times. I also had to go thru the process of blocking his and his GF's FB to move on. It's possible. But you have to keep yourself busy with things you are passionate about. Mine is salsa dancing and yoga. Good for your mind, body, and soul. Also good way to meet like-minded people. Try it, you won't regret it :)

I hate to admit that I keep hoping he'll call or text, but so far, nothing. The only time he responded was to a couple of text messages that I started earlier this month, but they were frank and to the point responses. I read in Stalking The Soul that one of the strategies that an N uses when starting a new relationship is to make the old NS be all bad and the new NS be all good. That is what happened to me in the beginning, it was always the old NS's fault and I was so much better. The thought that he has completely discarded me and is with someone else hurts terribly. I know I'll be ok, but it's really touch and go right now. I am journaling everything down so that I can then forget it all. It is the only way that I see that I will move forward (although I hate the idea of moving forward without him).

He has not tried to contact me since feb. 15th. He has a new gf and I am not needed. It is odd and mindblowing. I found this site and about narcissism around that time as well (thank God). Hard to believe that people are like that and that he is one of them. The longer he stays away the more I understand - hope one day to find complete peace, not there yet by a long shot. Peace. J

You are so right, more people tossed on a large pile that have devalued and discarded like rotten rubbish! I have very, very little contact with my stbx, although he left not only me, but two step sons. Only a little bit of legal stuff, and that is very rare that he will even respond to that. He only responds if it is something that will effect HIM. No contact with the boys......try to explain that to two kids that actually looked up to him as father figure for 8 years! As time goes by, I realize that's a good thing, though tortureous as it seemed at first, when I wanted him back. When I didn't know what happened to us, and what he was...I'm much wiser now, thanks in great part to this forum and the wonderful , warm and caring people here. It's been a very heartbreaking education, and one that I could have gone the rest of my life without knowing, and that would have been just fine with me.