After effects...

So yesterday I had yet another doctor's appointment trying to get answers as to what the hell is going on with my skin...

This all started some time ago, this strange hypopigmentation issue (lack of pigment, I.e.white spots) spreading on my face and chest...I was experiencing some turmoil on account of looking like a snow leopard....Throw in some birth control pill induced melasma (brown spots), even though I haven't had those in my system since 2010(!), and I was feeling like one splotchy mess...

May of 2012 I could feel it was all becoming more pronounced...I remember the date because the day before my father's birthday dinner I had spent the night at the N's house and when I awoke fresh faced early in the AM I was told by him "You need to put some make up on"

This May, when I finally had medical insurance again, I promptly made an appointment with a dermatologist. I go to the derma and she declares she finds my white spots "perplexing". After doing a "scraping" followed by some microscope observation she recommends doing a biopsy. I decide for her to please take the sample from an area on my chest rather than my face. The results came back basically as "scar tissue" and so in seeking an answer I return for yet another biopsy, this time from one of the spots on my face, that is at least back on the jawline for having to take out another chunk and wear a bandage as it heals up...Again, inconclusive results...I am really wanting to be able to figure out what's going on here! I take my derma's recommendation to visit another derma that is a "pigmentation specialist" and got into that appointment yesterday.

So, OMG after so much searching for answers he assesses me and diagnoses me with Neurodermatitis (that's related to one of my earlier posts about the absent minded itching/picking on yourself)...It's apparently one of these "psychogenic" conditions that he tells me can emerge after a period of intense stress/emotional trauma. I actually started crying when he asked if I had issues with stress and anxiety, depression, etc. as that is typical of people diagnosed with this condition... From what the doc told me, a lot of this pigment stuff has a strong neurological component...From my research so far, I've already learned about this amino acid called Tyrosine, that's used by the body to produce Melanin (the stuff that gives our skin pigment/color)...Anyhow, when a person is under stress an effect of that can be the body not producing enough!

So, I've got my answers and a lot of "digesting" to do...My treatment regimen, besides a topical cream, is to "Avoid stressors, which may cause worsening" "Life Situations: keep an eye on overall mood".

Holy shit, it's like all these suppressed emotions were coming out through my skin!

I know now I sure wasn't exaggerating when I mentioned in an earlier post how I thought even my skin looked better after being NC for a few days...

So I guess the point of my post is that I'm learning about ALL THE DIFFERENT WAYS there's a price to be paid for engaging with TOXIC/PD people...I see it as virtually impossible to emerge UNSCATHED in some kinda way....obvious or otherwise...

NC rocks! It's written all over my face:)