Valentines relief

As Valentine's Day approaches, and ads for romantic gestures, gifts, evenings, weekends, etc fill the internet, TV and pretty much everywhere, I'm noticing that I don't really feel sad at all that I'm alone. Instead, I'm feeling a tremendous sense of RELIEF that I don't have to rack my brain to find just the perfect expression of my love and devotion, that would inevitably NOT be the "right" gift or "enough".

It wasn't just Valentines Day, it was his birthday, Christmas, any gift-giving holiday that came around. Even in the early "honeymoon" days, he would find reasons that my gift choices fell short of his expectations, and it makes me angry to think of the amount of money I've spent on worthy gifts over the years - that I know were not appreciated.

Early on, I remember exN telling me that he refused to buy flowers on Valentine's Day because their price has been jacked up so much and he thought it was a rip-off. I actually had enough of a pair to tell him that flowers were non-negotiable on Valentine's Day - even if he had to grow and pick them himself to save money! He complied.