A Lesson from the Monkey House

My daughter and I went to our local zoo so often when she was a little girl. We loved it all- but the Primate House, specifically, was just so much fun...I don't know why, but I was really thinking of her- and the zoo- this past weekend, and I wanted to share my thoughts with all of my forum-buddies.

Among the jungle foliage and the waterfalls in this place are several plaques explaining all sorts of primate information- from relative primate sizes to simian behavior.

But this particular plaque always made me smile when I read it. (And pardon my gaps in memory here- it's been many years since I've visited this zoo).

The zoo display wanted you to imagine yourself a female (non-human) primate at estrus (looking for a mate) and the 'display' was offering two choices:

1) Handsome Hank (Shown grinning with a cluster of fawning females)

or

2) Homely Harry (illustrated to look somewhat dejected and surrounded by young)

The display went on to explain the consequences of your choice. The more 'Alpha', Handsome Hank had an endless 'supply' of willing females so he could care less about you and his offspring- but the upside was that your offspring would be strong and good looking (and probably more able to fend for themselves into adulthood).

Homely Harry, by contrast, would be more loyal, far more paternal and protective of you and the offspring. So, while your progeny would be more 'average', there's a definite upside to having another primate adult around.

Which would you choose, Ladies?

Disclaimer: This post was intended for entertainment purposes only. Any inference that non-human primates are similar in ANY way to human primates is expressly denied by the author of this post. Any resemblance to actual persons or events is purely coincidental.

Seriously, I needed a laugh today! I'm NOT saying that ALL NarcoPaths are 'Alpha', talented or necessarily good-looking... If they display any common talent, it is their ability to SELF-PROMOTE! Thanks for reading this- and feel free to add if you'd go for Harry or Hank! Or whatever!