forgetting bad stuff

Hi dear forum members,

It is getting up and down with my feelings and emotional breakdowns, but when yesterday I received an email from a place you can do courses, I decided to do it and do a digital camera course starting at the end of september.

The problem is that after a while, I start feeling a little stronger and better.. decide that I have to make my own life happy, accept that I am alone and lost a lot and then the selfdoubt starts again? like hm now I feel better maybe it was me all the time etc etc, what did you do about it? I want to go on with my life, but there is still a part of me that doubts, and hopes it seems.. I read a long time on the forum but I cant help this situation always coming back, I do know that ( I wont make contact!) when he will be in front of my door and I accept him back, within two weeks I will lose myself and happiness again, so why am I still thinking about it.. Just needed to share..

Have a nice day all of you, or sleep well~)

HUGS