Is this a valid thought

As I've been reading through a lot of the posts on here, it has passed my mind that perhaps part of what keeps some of us stuck is our OWN narcisistic qualities? Not that we are malignant NARCs but I read often that all of us have some narcisism... and that it is in fact healthy to have a certain level. So as I look back on what kept me trying for 16 years was in fact an excessive level on my own part of thinking I was "special" enough to be what other women in his life were not. That I was somehow better, loved him more, gave more.. blah blah blah. ( You know what I mean.) Then it's over.. and we obsess over what we did wrong... as though we should have had the "power" to change them by simple virtue of being "more" than we had been. Doesn't that in itself cause us to cultivate a "false personality"... one that we think will make him fall back into the person we first met?

Just a few thoughts I've been playing around with in an effort to never EVER get caught up in this trap again.