I am Super Fuckin' Moody These Days

15 posts / 0 new

#1 Dec 9 - 12AM

Anonymous (not verified)

I am Super Fuckin' Moody These Days

WTF is that all about? I'm a BITCH...seriously...a gnarly one at that. Just really impatient and irritable. Started therapy a month ago and already fired this one...she's an ice queen...sorry, not opening up to that broad. NEXT!

But at work...like every damn thing is making me snap recently. I'm in a good place with the ex...which to me, is defined by him being on my mind very infrequently, no more dreams of him (that I recall) and zero contact whatsoever...but that absence seems to have been replaced by something else. I hope it's just hormones or some whack explanation like that...anyone else have this going on?

#2 Dec 10 - 8AM

TNR1

I do believe that therapy is

I do believe that therapy is a great help....certain things I find that I do that are perplexing oftentimes are tied to something that did not originate from that situation but are tied to something from my childhood. I find that if I don't address the original situation from my childhood, I often will continue to react in the same way now as an adult. You may want to try to find another therapist to help you to delve deeper. There is a one on one option on this site that you may want to consider.

#3 Dec 10 - 5AM

JRB123

Know the feeling!

Hi- Think it's a natural reaction to what you've been through - having a narc experience would make anyone angry - you have a right to feel angry. Just need to let it out in a healthy way! Don't bottle it in and go for it in a healthy way is what I say! I went through an angry phase for about 8 months and even had a road rage swear out once with some asshole guy which was totally out of character for me! I'm over it now and feel back to my more mellow self (been NC for over a year now). I joined a boxercise class which was brilliant. It is totally full on, fast music, sweaty and all punching and kicking. It has helped me get fit and I can really let rip in a positive way. At one point I was at the front of the class totally giving it my all! I have calmed down now and still go to the class but I don't have the anger anymore! Can definately recommmend that sort of thing though! You have a right to feel angry so let it out!

#4 Dec 9 - 10AM

freaked

syren...cheer up my friend

Syren, please spend some time the Heartless Bitches site...it helps us remove all color from the illusion that surrounded us. today, i can sense that i have alomost turned into a HB... what better way to survive the tsunami? don't have friend, or ppl to chat with... riddled with inferiority complexes... keep thinking...omg..i must be a loser cos I never managed to get a guy's exclusive devotion for me... and now...it is too late...lot of wistfulness here. Nobody said to me.... you are 'more than a woman to me.....' DEE...are you around?? I really MUST sincerely heed your advise and STOP listening to romantic music....

#5 Dec 9 - 8AM

onwithmylife

syren66

ii am 3 years out and feeling horribly ANGRY at the asshole especially after we exchanged some letters recently he wrote me some terrible, hateful things blaming me totally for the end of our relationship and all these false accusations he directed at me. I am SO MAD and ANGRY, I guess a real delayed reaction, it is all normal, try a man therapist, been seeing a wonderful one and going back next week. the therapist said the man had NPD and when I asked him to read a hateful letter from the narc, his face turned ashen and he said he hope he did not have to read anything like that again..............he said let me know when we can shred all his horrible letters..........

#6 Dec 9 - 7AM

under his thumb

i am in the same place...but

i am in the same place...but i actually kind of enjoy it. i use the anger to keep me moving in the direction i want to go, as of now it is my motivation! are you doing any sort of workout? an intense sweat may help you out a bit too :)

#7 Dec 10 - 10AM (Reply to #10)

Syren66 (not verified)

No, not in my case, because

No, not in my case, because it's not anger..it's irritability and it's irrational. Nothing to work through when you don't know where the hell it came from in the first place! Face it...I just need to get laid.

#8 Dec 9 - 12AM

empath

Syren

I say this to you because I know how you will accept this from me... I think that is your body's gentle way of telling you it's time to start getting laid again. Do the world around you a favor and go get yourself some! ;) Go get some for me too, while you're at it, OK? :D I believe I know what you are likely going to say so I am going to agree with you in advance that there doesn't seem to be many worthy men out there.

#9 Dec 9 - 8AM (Reply to #8)

onwithmylife

empath

i wish i could find a good worthy man for sex, it has been 3 freaking years for me, the longest ever!!!!!!!!!!!!

#10 Dec 9 - 1AM (Reply to #7)

Syren66 (not verified)

You & Blessed

Are on to something here. It's been almost 2 years...2 (non)FUCKING YEARS. Yes, I do believe it is time for me to lariat me a hunky stud to use and abuse for an evening and then kick out of my bed. I don't want a relationship right now, but I will more than willingly accept the benefits sans drama. I'm surprised I haven't killed someone yet when I think of how long it's been. Dang!

#11 Dec 9 - 1AM (Reply to #6)

Blessed

Go get some for me too, while you're at it, OK? :D

If you're horny and you know it clap your hands!! I'm dying here. Breath in, breath out...

#12 Dec 9 - 12AM

Blessed

Horny?

Well, yes. Honestly, I chalk it up to lack of sex! The combination of getting over these freaks plus no sex is just brutal. Damn! Holy smokes. One day...

#13 Dec 9 - 12AM

uk lady

Hi Syren

Can't say I am, quite the reverse since I D&D him 8 months ago. Just very occasional pockets of extreme anger and usually triggered by something I read on the forum on behalf of other posters because it had happened to me whilst with the ex. Was more the bitch from hell when I was with him in the very latter days, because I had pieced it all together and had zero tolerance of his behaviour until I finally went bang, under starters' orders and didn't see me for dust. Do you think that you might just be being too hard on yourself and feeling that you should be further down the path/line than you are? It sure as hell happens and with that you become frustrated and angrier with the whole process. In that, "I am sick of all the hard work and just want it over with now?" Or, "how dare he have taken so much from me and I have to end up putting it all back together - too unfair". I so often felt that in the very early days. I got sick of researching, reading and thinking about it all. So stopped. Would be interested to hear more about your experience with the therapist and why you stopped. Are you looking for another? Hoping that your feelings/moods will shift soon. Dee x

#14 Dec 9 - 12AM (Reply to #2)

Syren66 (not verified)

Therapist. Second

Therapist. Second session...these are in her home...I walk in, compliment her on her tree...I get this icy "thank you"...I sit down in the room with her...and I pretty much had to lead the whole thing...there were no pleasantries from her, no ice breaker to start the session...it's like she was on automatic pilot...pretty much going through the motions. I'm sitting there thinking "fuck this...". Yes, I am looking elsewhere...too bad that most I'm running across seem to be narc-ish themselves or just flat don't give a shit. Yah that's really what I need after living with an abject asshole for 7 years who never once asked "how was your day?". Now I'm PAYING someone to treat me like dirt? Don't think so. As for the ex, I don't really think of him much these days...I'm not angry; not nearly as bad as I was before. I will say this...I have NO patience AT ALL for narcs in business, even clients. I loathe dishonest, game player type people and I can spot all of these characters at 20 paces these days. I instantly go into "walls up" mode around them. And trust me, I'm in no mood to help a narc once I've identified them as such. This is a problem. It's that and that I think I was just so used to being in a constant state of anxiety/negativity for so long, I don't know how to function now that I'm outside of it and the cause has been removed.

#15 Dec 9 - 1AM (Reply to #3)

uk lady

Just a thought

I so hope that being hyper sensitive to Ns etc these days won't damage your earnings capacity. As in, hope you are not on commission if you reject a potential client. If so, do you have PMI and so you could talk to someone neutral about your needs going forward to help with this? They could recommend a suitable practitioner perhaps. As to therapists. Mine was a psycho-therapist and practised Gestalt. I cannot stress how much he helped me in just 6 weeks. He did say that I had been so ripe for the experience and I took that to mean that I had needed help for ages. Didn't I know that. But, he was outstanding and had a really GSOH too. Maybe men therapist are better with women. I wasn't P/N alert then. After my sister died back in February I went for bereavement counselling. The difference was like chalk and cheese. She was all dippy headed and tried to put words into my mouth - which obviously I corrected her about. It helped but I would not have appreciated her as my original therapist. I found her a little odd and we had to stick to the script, or else. I don't know what others posters have felt in their experience with therapists. I think your last paragraph is very common for what we have encountered and don't know what to suggest really. God, it's all so tiring dealing with this stuff. Dee x

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