Why do they

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#1 Nov 27 - 6AM
Emma
Emma's picture

Why do they

Why do these arseholes always have to have the final word?!

My latest text off Narky: incase you hadn't guessed enough IS enough. Wear your asshat with pride.

Didn't waste my time replying to this drivel....

Nov 27 - 7PM
needing2know
needing2know's picture

I was lucky I guess, at the

I was lucky I guess, at the D&D I had the last word I told him "take care" lol and when i got narc attacked a while back i got the last word there too, he asked me if I hated him and was mad at him, told him no more like disappointed. He never said anything after my last comments.
Nov 27 - 2PM
Scoop
Scoop's picture

Emma , he has no idea that is

Emma , he has no idea that is the last word , he thinks you will respond , if anything that text was bating you to reply to maintain the suppy flowing . The one good thing with NC is it is the last word but with no word at all , no word from us equals no supply for him .. and they hate that more than anything .. ho hum . xx
Nov 27 - 2PM (Reply to #15)
Emma
Emma's picture

He's been trying to bait me

He's been trying to bait me all day. As he said, enoughs enough, I can't take anymore. He's going to do his usual trick, leave it for a few days then send me a nasty email. Usually, I'd reply and we'd bitch for ages. But this time, he's been blocked everywhere. Unless he appears at my door, I doubt very much I'll hear from him. Which will help me to move on and get back to how I used to be....happy!
Nov 27 - 3PM (Reply to #16)
Scoop
Scoop's picture

High five for blocking him ,

High five for blocking him , you are very strong and brave although it may not seem so right now , its ture ! Stay NC . Love is not abuse , it is nurchuring and wanting the very best for a person .. hold on to that diffrenece in his behaviour ..he is wanting to hurt you and the last time i looked that doesnt equal love .... xx
Nov 27 - 1PM
icancnow
icancnow's picture

emma

I know exactly how u feel. Before the psycho i was very fit. I worked out everyday. I ate very healthy n my skin was radiant. The last yr n half of our relationshit i was the skinniest i have ever been. Had nearly no appetite. My skin was pale n fir the furst time in my life i had acne and i was cobstantly sick. N dnt think fir a second that asshole didnt rub all this in my face! " wow r u on drugs...ur really skinny" " what happened to that thick fit figure u had? R u stressing over sonething" " man babe your skin looks really bad ... ur not taking care of urself like u use to" " why are u always sick? ..... what are you really up to? Maybe you should see a therapist for your anger issues... they are running you down" ugh to think if the affect they had on us. And loved every min of it just makes ne disgusted with not only him but myself. Nc has helped me so much. My appetite is back. I stay close to the forum n read read read n read sum more to constantly remind myself of what a nightmare i was reading.
Nov 27 - 8AM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

They have to have the last

They have to have the last words, always. It's just another form of CONTROL. Like Hunter says, delete, delete, delete...........
Nov 27 - 9AM (Reply to #9)
Emma
Emma's picture

But if i dont reply.. surely

But if i dont reply.. surely i have the control? If im so mouthy as he says, im sure he'd be dying for me to retaliate in some way..
Nov 27 - 9AM (Reply to #10)
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

Not always...........by you

Not always...........by you responding, he gets what he wants. Its a win, win for them. They either get the "final word" or they get a response. That is why NC is so important. If you don't respond, eventually, it will be perceived by the N as the silent treatment, so yes, you can gain "control" if that is what you are seeking. Best to seek healing, and not worry about the little games in between. They are dangerous to your emotional and physical health. And can actually make matters worse, and the healing harder. You may win the battle, but not the war. Not when it comes to the disordered. Walk away, never to look back. and heal.
Nov 27 - 9AM (Reply to #11)
Emma
Emma's picture

I know what you mean by

I know what you mean by physical health. In the last few months my appetite has dwindled alot. He even asked me if i had anorexia!! I tried to explain to him that i eat more when im happy..and when comfortable. He didnt make me happy..therefore my appetite practically dimished. He made me the most miserable i have ever been. Now he claims i need anti depressants! Joker!
Nov 27 - 9AM (Reply to #12)
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

Of course he does. That's

Of course he does. That's what they do. Try to make you feel like the crazy one. Take better care of yourself, eat when you know its time to eat, not when you feel hungry. Your mind is too pre-occupied with other things to think about eating. Set an alarm clock if you have to, 3 times a day to remind you to eat. Staying healthy is a huge factor in healing. Eating healthy and exercising is a must. If you stop watering a plant, it whilst and eventually dies. If you stop changing the oil in your car but continue to drive it, it eventually seizes and the engine dies. Same with us. Our bodies need to be MAINTAINED just like everything else. PAY NO ATTENTION TO WHAT HE SAYS. When you think back on his words, do what I do, I replace his voice with the teacher from "Charlie Brown" Wha, wha, wha, wha, wha, wha,wha...........it works!
Nov 27 - 7AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Delete,Delete,Delete Hunter

Delete,Delete,Delete Hunter
Nov 27 - 6AM
empath
empath's picture

projection

He's texting you out of the blue with a gem like that? What a loon!
Nov 27 - 7AM (Reply to #2)
Emma
Emma's picture

I think hes realized he cant

I think hes realized he cant control me anymore!
Nov 27 - 7AM (Reply to #3)
empath
empath's picture

Emma

You go girl! Stay NC! NC is taking back our power and silence speaks volumes. Batten down the hatches while he's in narcissistic rage mode and let his little storm blow on by. It is amazing to see how much projection he crammed into just that one little text! Thank you for sharing that. I hope his next one is as equally ridiculous and easy to ignore.
Nov 27 - 7AM (Reply to #4)
Emma
Emma's picture

According to him.. 'gobby

According to him.. 'gobby bitches like me are ten a penny'.. id like him to find someone who can put up with his constant lies, bullshit and put downs as i did.. No i didnt reply, never will..But guaranteed il hear something from him before or at christmas time..i just know it! As nasty as he makes me out to be.. he cant keep away!
Nov 27 - 7AM (Reply to #5)
empath
empath's picture

emma

How predictable and transparent they become when we go NC. I just got narc attacked last week and wasn't able to be so indifferent to it...it actually bothered me very much because I am still dealing with my own issues. I didn't respond to him, however I certainly "had a response". I don't want him back...I want myself back. It is always inspiring for me to read success stories about maintaining NC, and even more so since I let the last few emails from him get to me.
Nov 27 - 7AM (Reply to #6)
Emma
Emma's picture

It took a while for me to

It took a while for me to realise that the messages and emails were just another way for him to get to me..to get further under my skin..if i dont read, he cant get to me...he loses..I win.. simple. As Hunter says.. delete delete..its the only way i know i can move forward and he stays stuck in the dark hole hes always been in!