Is this public???

People who are going through a divorce or trying to avoid a stalker might want to remain anonymous. If the exn is looking for leverage in a divorce, they might look for us on their computer. But try not to forget that we are persona non grata to these freaks. They didn't care about our feelings when we were with them; why the hell would they care now? They do not devote one of their few neurons to us. Plus, their processing abilities are so very skewed that they are going to have very different (and fewer) memories of the relationship. Chances are, they will have forgotten about the time they physically restrained you from leaving. He/she might read this on a forum (again, I doubt they'd give one shit about our recount of their abuse. Not one!) and not recognize themself at all. They hit you? They'll remember how YOU hit them. They're selfish and addicted to certain things? They don't think they have a problem so they won't recognize themselves. They've moved on to new supply and we hardly exist at all. If they can't see us, they don think about us. Especially when feeding off new supply. They are narcissists. They do not care enough what we think to look for messageboards we might be haunting. This is part of their disorder. Your opinion doesn't exist to them and all of their time is focused on themselves and their desires. I'm not worried at all. My ex would describe himself as a smart, thoughtful Christian man who was involved in a relationship with a selfish woman who refused to give him what he wanted. She was so selfish! Talk about cognitive dissonance! He'd never recognize himself from an outsider's point of view. There are no outsiders. Just him. It's all about him.

All of it is public, if you change your username to one that is a common word, then google searching will not necessarily bring anyone to your posts - ever. When I search Journey, WAY more comes up than anything on this site for instance.

to not give any identifying info about him on here but now I just tell my story and don't give a crap if someone figures out who it is - its finally about me! But do not use your real name! That could be dangerous I was thinking today about how similar these men all are and thinking maybe narcissism is a mutant gene they all have or maybe just a normal, albeit awful, variation of what being human means. Maybe its not a personality disorder or attachment disorder but just a subtype - maybe there are very many of them - they all say and do the same things - weird Maybe they really are aliens with no heart!

That's the best way to protect yourself. Give yourself another name, or come up with something like "Sparrow" or "Hunter." The name doesn't have to be real. You can ask Lisa for help with that!

Information and forum rules are all over this site.. It's in your best interest read the information Lisa has provided.. Hunter

so glad you asked this question... goggled my user name and it led me straight here. never even thought about it being public or not... I use this use name often... I think it may be too late to change because its already out there...

You can google into this forum. This should be a public one, anyone can read. I only post things that i wont mind even exN reads them. For private questions i use the PM function. Hope this helps.

If you are using your real name as your user name here, please consider changing it, to protect your privacy and anonymity.