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Need Advice Please!!

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#1 Oct 25 - 10PM
Tiffany30
Tiffany30's picture

Need Advice Please!!

I am trying to make NC with my ex, but he has to pay me a check each month on the first of the month. I e-mailed him to tell him that from now on I want him to either put my check in my mailbox or mail it to me. He replied with "It is illegal to put anything in your mailbox and if I mail it to you I have no proof that you got it by the 1st". He also added "Come up with another plan, I will be at the hospital with the baby all weekend". (This baby was a product of his affair with another married women). What should I say back to him about getting my check to me without seeing me. Is this an excuse just to see me each month? Any advice would be greatly appreciated as I don't want to see him anymore and he has to pay me each month for the next five years.

Oct 26 - 10PM
aceonelady
aceonelady's picture

Tiffany30

What about pay pal?jUST SET A pAY pAL ACCOUNT BOTH OF YOU ,THE ONLY THING NECESSARY IS TO HAVE AN EMAIL ACCOUNT BOTH OF YOU...AND YOU GET A RECEIT BY EMAIL TOO.VERY FAST,FREE.

Aceonelady

Oct 26 - 10PM
Tiffany30
Tiffany30's picture

I feel good, I emailed my exN

I feel good, I emailed my exN and stood up for myself! Of course it made him mad and he said something about I will never find out the truth? Not sure what he was talking about, but I don't care. He also said He will let me think about that for a while, guess what I laughed at his comments! Not going to email him back though, NC is the way I am going.
Oct 26 - 4AM
Tigerlily
Tigerlily's picture

Just another way of pulling the strings.

All the suggestions listed below are good. Do what will cost YOU the least energy and pain long-term. Best is if the money is transferred automatically. Don`t let him manipulate you into giving him more attention than he`s worth (and he ain`t worth NONE). What a pathetic little jerk. You have my sympathy. Tigerlily
Oct 25 - 11PM
lillymarch
lillymarch's picture

What about return receipt

What about return receipt where you have to sign to get it and they send him a receipt of that? What a weirdo because how could he prove he handed you a check? Because he said he did? How is that proof. Tell him he's a smart cookie and that your sure he'll figure it out! So sorry you're dealing with that.
Oct 25 - 10PM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

He obviously lives in the

He obviously lives in the same state. Can't his payment be set up to automatically deposit into your account? These days with technology, it is so much easier...........my alimony shows up in my bank account every Friday morning like magic! I never have to say boo about it. Love it! Hopefully that is an option that you can possibly consider. Good luck!
Oct 25 - 10PM
Kimmy2
Kimmy2's picture

It sounds like he is making

It sounds like he is making it your problem. Is he retarded? I doubt it. I'm sure he is quite capable of figuring it out. Is he pretending to be stupid. Making it your problem??
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #10)
Tiffany30
Tiffany30's picture

To him everyone else is the

To him everyone else is the problem! His own parents have disowned him!
Oct 25 - 10PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

He's an asshole.. His

He's an asshole.. His cancelled check is his receipt.. Tell him to use bill pay or better yet take Assclown back to court and have his wages garnished.. And only answer him once.. Do no go back an forth with this.. I hope he can continue to pay. Diapers are expensive... Lord he's somebody's dad!! Hunter
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #7)
Tiffany30
Tiffany30's picture

Thank you! He is an asshole!

Thank you! He is an asshole! Last time he brought me a check he showed up unannounced and his "girlfriend" was with him in his car! Good advice! So glad I am on this forum now.
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #8)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Tell him you will not answer

Tell him you will not answer the door when he comes to th house.. He is hovering when he brings the check to the house.. He owes you the money so how he gets it to you is his problem and you don't have to answer the door at your house ., As for his GF she is really stupid.. I would never allow him to bring a check to your house every month let alone sit in th car while he delivers it. This is 2011 not 1950.. Talk about triangulation ! Structure a crafted letter with your rules.. Hunter
Oct 25 - 10PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

He can send it certified mail

He can send it certified mail return receipt requested or he can overnite it to you where a signature is required or he can courier it over to you where you will also have to sign for it but it seems to me that the cheapest easiest way is would be certified mail
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #4)
Tiffany30
Tiffany30's picture

Thank you

Thank you
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #5)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Tiffany I sent you a PM

Tiffany I sent you a PM
Oct 25 - 10PM (Reply to #2)
Kimmy2
Kimmy2's picture

Why can't he just do it

Why can't he just do it electronically on Internet or organize a transfer into your account every month automatically.
Oct 26 - 12AM (Reply to #3)
lana22
lana22's picture

The stbxnh did the same thing

The stbxnh did the same thing to me. I finally had him forward my monthly hazard pay to my attorney who then mails it to my home. Hunter is right, he is an asshole. The best receipt that you received your check is the cancelled check. I don't know what's more insulting.....that they really are stupid or that they assume we are. Just another lame excuse to hoover.