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Waves of emotion

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#1 Sep 30 - 11PM
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

Waves of emotion

Hi everyone
I just wanted to give an update and let you know how things are. I have not talked to n now in 3 weeks. He has been silent since telling me he went back to his ex. Last week I posted on here that one of his ow's posted a slandering comment about me. I then had texted n to back off and never to contact me again. I then blocked his ow's and so called friends on fb. I don't want to have the relapse of ever looking again.
This has now been the longest time in three years that we have not talked. It has been such a wave of emotions. One day I am fine and the next very down. I absolutely know that he is toxic and would never want him back. His silent treatments are something I have dealt with always....he is the master. He is so cruel.
I am going to survive this and stay strong. I just have to say that even though I don't post on here a lot, I read daily and this site has helped me to stay strong.
nc nc nc

Oct 1 - 10AM
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

Hi Hunter, Thank you. Yes, I

Hi Hunter, Thank you. Yes, I had read that silent treatment is abuse. That is actually how I found this site almost a year ago. I had been googling silent treatment, and then I found this site and saw so many traits he has listed in the stories here. Of course, I keep thinking that maybe it was all me, maybe he is just going "NC" on me...but then I think back and rememeber that he had always told me when he "dumps" someone that he turns them off like a light switch. When he left his exwife (after she put out a restraining order), she later wanted to talk to him after the RO was over, but he refused and filed for a divorce. They never talked again, only thru laywers. He wouldn't answer her calls or texts, he laughed at her. Now, he has snapped his fingers and let her "back in". I feel for her, because she is starting this all over again. I have learned so much, and have really realized I have been abused over the last 3 years. I just wish I would start feeling more consistent in my emotions. One day good, next day not so good. And yes...the silent treatment and no closure does make me feel so unworthy, it has killed my spirit. But I will remain strong. I have too. Thanks everyone!
Oct 1 - 8AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

O2befree

I'm sure you are aware of this but it's worth a quick read! http://abuse101.com/silenttreatmentandabuse.html Hunter
Oct 1 - 1AM
Sea
Sea's picture

We can make it!!

Same here 3 years wasted in relationshit and cruel ST and that disordered one running around all the exes, ow, fwb etc. We had enough!!! We want out!!! We suffer some ups and downs in emotion but we can make it!! Hugs!
Sep 30 - 11PM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

The waves of emotion are very

The waves of emotion are very common. Don't fret, you are not alone. I remember how painful this process was/is................you will find your way. If you are not comfortable with posting, thats ok..........keep reading, it will help. You are not alone! Stay strong!
Sep 30 - 11PM
Sunafterrain
Sunafterrain's picture

O2

GOOD FOR YOU!!!! But be CAUTIOUS too. If you have always been the one to run back and the longer you are NC, the likelihood that he will try to bust back into your life is very real. Prepare for anything the longer you stay NC. Good for you on all the blocking. You can do this!
Sep 30 - 11PM (Reply to #2)
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

Thank you both so much! I am

Thank you both so much! I am still just trying so hard to get past the hurt. He hated his exw so bad...she took out restraining orders on him twice, he talked so badly about her....but as he used to always say...'a hole is just a hole'.....I feel sorry for her, because she has seen his wrath and got out...now she is sucked back in....the cycle will repeat itself I am certain.