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Dammit!

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#1 Sep 29 - 8PM
needing2know
needing2know's picture

Dammit!

Once again I am feeling the urge to contact my ex! I don't know why and it is making me crazy! I am 9 wks NC and I do not want to contact him, but for some stupid ass reason I feel like I Need to contact him. I Have been doing so good and now I am hit with this stupid feeling again! I hate it and I want it to all just go away!

Sep 29 - 9PM
tresor2
tresor2's picture

This is normal Needing

2know. It's called stinking thinking and it's not a stupid reason. It's all part of recovery process...your brain is craving the drug. Try and get in touch with what triggered you. For me, it was frequently lonliness, a song or thought about the good times. Our thinking relapses way before we make contact so try and be very conscious of your thoughts. A text can happen in a split second...I slipped many many times before I finally got it under control. Mindfulness practices, meetings, friends, family, activites, exercise are good antidotes. Isolation isn't a good thing. Hang in there...the longings will pass.
Sep 29 - 9PM (Reply to #6)
needing2know
needing2know's picture

tresor 2

I am not alone, my kids are here and everyone is playing and laughing. Been a good day for the most part, I have noticed off and on that I feel angry, or annoyed, but it really isn't how I AM feeling, these are feelings I use to feel before he got to my house, I could always sense his mood before he got here even without ever talking to him, I wonder if I am actually feeling something from him! It's like I am feeling annoyed that there is no contact from me! As weird as it sounds. I know I don't want to contact him , but for some reason this stupid ass thought is pulling me his direction. I never text, i always E-mailed him , I always went after him this is the very first time I didn't go after him in 7 yrs. and the longest , i always went after him within a week. I am 9 wks out.
Sep 29 - 9PM (Reply to #7)
tresor2
tresor2's picture

Needing

Congrats on the 9 wks NC. I'm sure you're feeling his energy; I frequently had some kind of telepathy thing with mine. I think we're all trying to break our cycles of behavior and maybe that's why you're struggling with the thought. You're reprogramming. Don't give him the pleasure of your contact. Remember, supposidly what bothers them the most is silence.
Sep 29 - 9PM
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

needing2know

Unfortunately, the very things that we'd like to forget about these ill fated relationships, are in fact the things we need to remember, in order to stay out of trouble. Don't get sloppy now. Remember how he treated you with no respect. You don't want to contact him. That would be silly and you would not be happy if you did. You should be feeling quite proud of yourself for staying NC. Keep up the good work, Don't let him get the better of you!
Sep 29 - 9PM (Reply to #4)
needing2know
needing2know's picture

ruby

I won't get sloppy, I have come too damn far now, and I remember very well how he treated me. that is something I will never forget. I am very proud of myself, my friends even said today they cannot believe I stayed NC this long.
Sep 29 - 9PM
needing2know
needing2know's picture

sparrow

IT'S NOT WORKING!
Sep 29 - 8PM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

Deep breathing exercises.

Deep breathing exercises. Seriously........just like when you are kicking a habit, you have an urge, but the urge actually lasts approx 3 minutes..............give it a try next time!