It makes me sick thinking about what hes saying to others about me, making himself look like the victim. Especially after all i did and gave up to try to show him how much i cared. How is it that they always come out as the victim??
My narc finally D&D`d me for the fifth time, saying I had humiliated him too often.
What humiliated him was: my making over 200$ at street music on my own and only 70 cents with him:
His friends liking my piano playing and
My friends laughing at my jokes.
He told me one of the problems with his ex-wife was that she was envious of him. He also told me, when he had said to her that he felt I deserved more success, she had answered, "well, with you she`s sure to be successful". He found that awesome, that she should be so nice. It sounded like sarcasm to me, but I didn`t know her and didn`t even know him well at that point, so filed it away for future reference.
The first time I met his mother, he allowed her to win an argument and when she was amazed, he said, "I`m a much nicer person since I met Tigerlily".
She answered, "Hmph. I wonder how long that will last".
When I start agonizing about what you`re agonizing about, I tell myself that the people who are important to me know the truth, and those who aren`t important to me aren`t important to me.
Love
Tigerlily
He moved a junkie into our home to "help pay the bills>" about 7 weeks ago. The guy never payed a dime ......But get this....The homeless addict moved out today because he "couldnt deal with the drama no more." CAN I SAY END quote???lmao
My escape plan is in order. The electricity should be shut off any day now because he "forgot to pay it."
I'Ve already been moving my shit into storage for about a week now secretly ....in preparation.
I am taking my daughter and going to the shelter when it happens. They know we are coming. I have been meeting with them in secret.
Even homeless addicts want nothing to do with him.
Yes! Anger is good! I still have a lot of anger in me and my therapist is thrilled I'm finally angry! It took me months to get angry.
You deserve to be angry at how his the stupid victim to his friends. But there's nothing you can do to change what he says. You can control how you react to things you do and say though. You can take your empowering anger and use it to your benefit to get things done in your life. You can take this energy and live life they way you want to.
...that's how it happens. They use the "poor me" scenario to buy sympathy and supply. Nothing is ever, ever their fault! Soon enough people will see the truth. Some may never see it, but so what. YOU KNOW THE TRUTH and whatever others think of him is immaterial to your health and happiness.
It is so unfair, I know. But when I think in terms of my disordered one's constant cries of victimhood it's truly pathetic. And very, very unattractive. It will catch up to him eventually. I know it. You can't be a victim of everything your whole life all the time. People start to see the pattern, just like you are seeing it now.
Try to let it go, Miss J! You are doing so great in your progress. This is a glitch. It will get less and less. He's a loser and a fake, bottom line!
Most sincerely,
(not) spinning. NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT AND IT FEELS GREAT
When I told the ex-Psych prof I loved him. When I congratulated him on being engaged. What NORMAL PERSON DOES THAT???
He cried "victim" when I treated him in a kind, compassionate, NORMAL way! I doubt my brother in-law whined&cried that he was a victim&his personal boundaries when he was congratulated on being betrothed! I HIGHLY doubt it!
That's the problem with Ns/Ps, when they cry "victim" under abnormal circumstances. NORMAL people don't call themselves victims when people proclaim their love or wish them happiness in their lives.
I doubt the ex-P was considered a victim when I told him I loved him... I think his colleagues found it unattractive&pathetic. They probably said "She told you she loved you. What is so da*n horrible about that?"
He claimed I put him in an "awkward position" when I met his girlfriend instead of telling the truth about her.
No wonder I emotionally victimized him afterwards, toyed with his feelings, was PURPOSEFULLY cruel to him... knowing NOBODY would believe him. I knew he'd cry wolf, people would shrug, and the wolf would lick his lips.
I can soooo relate, all his friends think I'm a jealous freak and he's even told bartenders he wanted to break up with me and I was controlling.
It makes me really mad for some reason, I'm a great girl and like you, I've done nothing but help him in every way.
He's probably even saying that I kicked him out of the flat, when he moved his shit out months ago and I just asked for the key last Sunday... (he has been coming to the flat when he pleased and not paid a cent on rent or bills since May)
Honestly, they know the
People aren`t so stupid
His third person moved out of our house today.
Always the victim!
Yes! Anger is good! I still
They're pathetic, Miss Jade...
spinning
He said he was a victim...
I can soooo relate, all his