Misogynistic man

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#1 Jun 29 - 3AM

Scoop

Misogynistic man

All narcs hate women , all narcs hate everyone apart form themselves and i still think in the dead of night when no one is looking the narc hates himself too (could just be wishfull thinking ).. Here is artical on Misogynistic men .. All narcs are misogynistic and some "normal "men are too ... Its good to remind ourselves we as women are a long way form equality although closer to it than many parts of the world . I read an artical where the women in Saudi Arabia are starting to take driving lessons where as before they where banned form driving a car (they could run away much faster if they could drive see )The Saudi sisters just said "we are doing it weather you like it or not " and Women driving schools are popping up all over the country .. High five !
Here is the artical by Steph Tallman Smith . http://www.lifescript.com/Life/Relationships/Hang-ups/How_To_Tell_If_You...

Big Love Scoop x

#2 Aug 10 - 9AM

pilker

His madonna-whore problem and more

The N had a rampant Madonna-Whore complex. Towards the end, when I was trying to have a "discussion" with him (futile) about his latest sabotaging moves, he suddenly barked at me "What's my favorite movie?!" This I knew; he had told me over and over: "The Mother and the Whore". He demanded his women be both and nothing other in his limited universe. Apparently I was being negligent in one of my "roles" at the time. He calls his latest Supply, the child he recently married (his 4th, and she's 35 1/2 years younger than he), "mother". GAG. But you know, all N's need a mommy 'cause who loves you more? Whenever we were in a restaurant and there was a group of women having a good time it drove him CRAZY! He couldn't stand it. As if, how DARE they have a good time among themselves (without him as the center of attention)! He once put leftover food in the boot of a woman in a sushi restaurant (it was left outside their private cubicle) just because he couldn't stand seeing that all-female group having a fun celebratory dinner together. He judges all women by their looks and expects them to sex themselves up for him at all times (this from a paunchy, double-chinned, greying and losing-his-hair 56-year old who shops at the Salvation Army). He considers himself lefty and liberal and has a high profile position in a progressive community school but he has a whole collection of derogatory adjectives for lesbians and his favorite terms for women in general are c*nts and bitches. Sadly, people let him get away with it.

#3 Aug 10 - 9PM (Reply to #20)

chimpy1985

Just out of curiosity because

Just out of curiosity because I would love to hear someone elses Madonna/whore stories. Did your N obsess over porn or other women? I have reached a point where I am unsure what is a 'normal' amount of porn/masturbation and what isn't because I spent so long focussed on how often he did it and listened to his bullshit about how its normal and I am the freak because I dont do it... I am talking I disconnected the internet, he goes to the shop and buys magazines. I walk out the door after trying to have sex with him (of course refusal) and 2 minutes later his pants are down watching porn on the net. Just to think back to it brings me to tears because it has really damaged me as a person and my self esteem. But anyway thats not the issue, I just wanted to know how your madonna/whore acted and also, for someone who is such a misogynist how can he be so obsessed with the 'perfect' womans image? CONFUSED!!!!

#4 Aug 11 - 7AM (Reply to #21)

pilker

Yes, yes, and yes. He had a

Yes, yes, and yes. He had a *severe* porn addiction. Couple that with his admitted fear of intimacy and you've got one unhappy and unsatisfied female partner. That, and rejections which couldn't be reconciled with his non-stop sex talk - it really did a number on me. I felt, and still feel, as you said, like I had/now have no concept of 'normal' after being involved with this guy. And it made me wonder if my other relationships with 'normal' boyfriends were 'normal'? But that's because he wasn't/isn't normal. He's emotionally and sexually retarded and actually has no idea how to sexually or intimately please anyone but himself. There was this weird missing component. I was the "love of his life", etc, but the physicality of that was not there for me to actually feel, hold, and connect to. I have a very healthy sex drive and interests but I usually felt like he was having sex on me, or at me, but rarely *with* me, and that his mind was on his porn at all times (and he would often call me his whore if I was especially pleasing him. Not my name or any love-name, but "you whore".) It totally damaged my sense of sexual self-worth. By the way, if I asked him what his dreams were, he said it was usually a recurring dream of being in "a porn mall". Just what I want to hear from my lover's lips in the morning....

#5 Jul 3 - 3PM

greengirl91

My ex N gives me the silent

My ex N gives me the silent treatment now. I`m sure he does this revendge for all feminine race or something, along with his mother. He must have been screwed pretty bad before anyone would have the chance to "fix" him. I personally know this also, because my family is not a so called normal one. But still..I wouldn`t hurt people intentionally only to make me feel superior as those individuals do.. Now I`m in the phase when I`m rather tending to mourn the loss of the person I thought he was, to let go of that illusion..and slowly, but surely, to come back to life. It is a process, a journey but it is worth it.

#6 Jul 3 - 12PM

deecbee

Narcs DO hate themselves and

Narcs DO hate themselves and I suspect that deep down they know it, too. Their entire existence is an act to avoid or downplay that self-hatred, but it comes out in all that they do.

#7 Aug 10 - 1PM (Reply to #17)

onwithmylife

DEECBEE-

So true, they have utter loathing and hatred for themselves, Iwill never forget the narc cursing himself out over a silly accident, I sure wish I knew what went wrong with him and his mother growing up, whatever it was, was REAL bad news for him and his emotional lack of maturity.

#8 Jul 3 - 9AM

ruby01 (not verified)

This link

describes mine to a T: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/misogyny.shtml

#9 Jun 30 - 10PM

TraumaMamma

Ah, hindsight

No doubt, I am sure my Narc was one. He complained his sisters were never close to him, or ever set him up on dates with their friends growning up. All of his sisters live close together, he calls it "the Coven" He has a hard time relating to his mother, due to an abusive stepfather he put in ICU at one point before he left home. His real father committed suicide. He said he cannot shed a tear for someone who took their own life. I find that sad. I have cried for people who have done just that in my profession and the people they left behind. How fucking cold. Why did I expect an ounce of empathy from someone who said such a thing? He also admitted putting a guy in ICU who started some crap during a traffic accident. He *seemed* like the gentlest man on earth, was very religious, told me to bless my children, tell them I loved them, and yet, I knew so little about his family dynamics. His mother is dying and he didn't want to go see her this weekend, but rather "go have fun" he knows he will see her again someday. As far as dating went prior? I told him about my past relationships. If an ex called me I would answer the phone in front of him. Nothing to hide....I have no idea about his past ex's how they went sour. He used to joke around he liked to date women with kids because they liked to have sex. I jokingly replied back, that it only guaranteed I had sex four times and it didn't mean I enjoyed it any of those times. Ironically, I do like sex. Alot. He couldn't get it up or was too tired to have it. Wtf!?!?!?

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.' --Mary Anne Radmache

#10 Jun 30 - 4PM

Kitty02 (not verified)

Wishful thinking??? let's

Wishful thinking??? let's hope not hun xox

#11 Jun 30 - 7AM

Lobo555

"I love women!"

CharlieSheenWinning like to declare loudly, "I love women!!!!" While schnockered, of course. Nothing could have been further from the truth. Not only does he use, abuse, and discard, he likes to rub OWs in the face of those he's used, abused, and discarded. I am friends with most of my ex's -- because they are decent people. CharlieSheenWinning, as far as I know, isn't friends with an ex unless he's re-seeking her for supply. He likes to stalk and torment them, this I do know. Luckily, he's got NewWinningWife to amuse him right now, so I am not subject to hoovering or anything of that nasty sort. But I'm sure when (not if) I run into them when I'm out and about, he'll shove their relationship in my face. Glad to be rid of him, but not looking forward to what he has up his sleeve. :/

#12 Jun 30 - 3PM

onwithmylife

the narc

had no respect for women and that was coming from a fellow male worker of his, so i always suspected he had a hatred of women starting with his mother who thwarted his view of himself and looked at him as an extension of her...........

#13 Jun 29 - 5PM

ValiditySeeker

Total misogynist and unwilling to ackowkwdge it.

I pointed it out to him every time he told me an anti-female joke. I told him that you wouldn't tell a racist joke to a black person, you wouldn't tell an anti-Semitic joke to a Jew, why would you tell me these jokes and expect me to laugh? He accused me of lacking sense of humor. He also made negative comments about every fenale's appearance in his path. If we watched the evening news, he would rail that the female anchor was "NOT attractive!!!" like it offended him. I pointed out that neither was the make anchor. He said it didn't matter in men. He hated women but it was such a normal way if being for him, he didn't understand when I pointed out how inappropriate it was.

#14 Jun 29 - 4PM

Susan32

I ASSUMED..

The ex-Psych prof treated men better. He'd ogle men in my presence, say he felt more comfortable around men than women, worshipped his father instead of his mother, treated male students better than female ones. Boy was I wrong! He was a misogynist. But it didn't mean he treated men better. -He cruelly D&D'd a fellow professor, an openly gay one with whom he had a brief liaison. He'd refer to this professor as a "man scorned", this gay prof considered the ex-P an incarnation of pure evil. -A male prof, slightly older than him, called him by his first name. He gave this male prof the silent treatment... until he was called by his surname. The ex-P said he was "teaching a lesson" to this colleague. -A male disciple of the ex-P had the ex-P as his senior thesis advisee. During the final D&D, I was walking to the coffee shop. I saw the male groupie talking to the ex-P about his essay. The ex-P was walking around an ornamental pond, not even giving him eye contact. I assumed "oh, he's a misogynist, my mistake was being born a woman"--I was WRONG! He might have treated men WORSE... because we don't tend to see males as victims, let alone victims of Narcs.

#15 Jun 29 - 4PM

mystwoman

Great post! Both of my xh's

Great post! Both of my xh's are misogynists. Xnh #2 is openly hostile to women. He has tons of caustic put-down jokes, and demeaning statements about women. I always found it very offensive. Xnh #1 was a little more covert, but he definitely still hated women. Both were narcissists and completely self-absorbed. Both were incredibly controlling. Both were abusive. Both cheated. My second xnh is currently living in an expensive house he cannot afford having a financial meltdown because of his constant spending habits with both of his "adult" daughters (ages 18 and 21) and the oldest P daughter's female newborn baby. IMO, God help them all. Well, except for maybe his oldest hideous P daughter. She and xnh are a matched set of psychopathic behavior. They interact like gasoline and fire when they're together. He's getting his "just due" from her. Personally, I find it to be poetic justice. rofl. However, I feel for the baby and xnh's youngest daughter. It's really damaging to live with someone that condemns you for being born female (or just being born and having the nerve to breath without the narc's "permission", for that matter). I wouldn't want to be stuck with a monster like xnh for a father or grandfather. As for me, I've spent enough years being called "you f*cking cunt" and slammed into corners to last me a lifetime. My goal is to never hear, "You just think with your twat" again. I can live quite happily without this kind of treatment. :) Hugs.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

#16 Aug 10 - 8PM (Reply to #8)

Arwen

Mystowman once I was called a

Mystowman once I was called a fucking cunt by my ex N, I too, knew that I would never, ever have him back. He can never, ever take that back no matter how much he might like to, no matter how much he changed which he won't of course, no matter what he gave me or apologized for. Those words C-nt, will forever have come out of his woman-hating disgusting, filfthy mouth and I can never think of his mouth and beautiful lips again without seeing those words come from his mouth.

#17 Jun 29 - 7PM (Reply to #2)

Redhead1

My ex narc loved women as

My ex narc loved women as long as they were in a maternal role. When I quit giving him his way(like his mom) is when all hell broke loose. As long as women treat him with kid gloves, they get the good side. Call him out and you are definitely a bitch. His sister would call him out in a second. she definitely didnt mind putting him in his place. He always treated her like a bitch. She is a great person, he just couldnt stand the truth from her.

#18 Aug 10 - 8PM (Reply to #7)

Arwen

Redhead me too as soon as I

Redhead me too as soon as I found out his big awful secrets and problems with serious things in his life I became a bitch. And not just a bitch, but a crazy bitch to be exact.

#19 Jun 30 - 7AM (Reply to #5)

mystwoman

Xnh did this, too. He liked

Xnh did this, too. He liked a women that treated him like his mommy would treat him. However, the second they came out of that role, he called them "bitch". As for the "other" maternal role of being mother of his own children, xnh had absolutely NO respect. Xnh had nothing but caustic put-downs and derogatory snipes to make about his first ex-wife (the mother of his children). Somehow he just never figured out WHY she would get upset (and didn't think it was funny) when he made comments like, "Having sex with a pregnant woman is like putting gas into a car you've already wrecked." Duh. She was pregnant with HIS own child when he said this. Xnh is a true misogynist swine.

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

#20 Jun 30 - 11AM (Reply to #6)

Susan32

Ns and Pregnancy

In the sick mind of an N, pregnancy is the ultimate devaluing. The ex-Psych prof would say that he&I would fight, but it would be WORSE if I were pregnant. He saw pregnancy as the ultimate form of control-he was obsessed with what pregnant women ate. He'd say that if I bore his children, he'd be disappointed. (During the final D&D, after I told him I loved him, he said he was disappointed) The ex-P idolized the men in "War and Peace" who mistreat their pregnant wives. Prince Andrei emotionally abuses, then abandons, his pregnant wife Lisa. He finds her pregnancy disgusting. Nicholas Rostov ignores Princess Maria when she's pregnant, and emotionally abuses her as well. In the first epilogue, Maria is expectant, and Nicholas tells Pierre that he finds babies disgusting&can't stand them. Ns/Ps are perversely ENVIOUS of children. The ex-P was JEALOUS of me volunteering at a local school-and I told him that it wasn't as if I miraculously bore a class of 25 10-year- olds(!!) I told him he had NOTHING to be jealous of. It's not as if I were rocking these kids to sleep, nursing them, but he still raged. Ns/Ps want the women in their life to be MATERNAL towards THEM. But when their women are maternal towards their children, they get envious. I felt TERRIBLE for the ex-P's girlfriend when I found out she had twins. The ex-P had deemed me worthless after I declared my love... but in his eyes, I think she was a "wrecked car" as soon as he knocked her up. He couldn't stand my needs as a college student. Okay, throw in the needs of a pregnant woman, of infant twins... I look *EASY* in comparison.

#21 Jun 29 - 7PM (Reply to #3)

onwithmylife

Redhead

you have a good point, the exnarc liked this older woman, like his mothers age, and they would play games together, he liked her as a mother figure, since his own mom had just died a few years earlier, so screwed up when it comes to views of women

#22 Jun 30 - 11AM (Reply to #4)

Susan32

Post-menopausal women

My former Narc boss was open that he was into hiring and being with "post-menopausal women." He had MAJOR crushes on the Barefoot Contessa (Ina Garten) and Lidia Bastianich. He LOVED older women. At the same time, he liked hanging out with lesbians. He hired an African-American lesbian (but made really crude jokes about her behind her back), one of his favorite coworkers was a very butch, crew cut lesbian nurse. My boss was quite proud about catering at a lesbian wedding (when it was still legal here in California) He thought younger women were too flighty,immature&hormonal. He still hangs out with a former coworker whom he injured, caused to go on disability.. and LIED about it to management. She pals around with him. She's a mother figure to him, despite being a couple of years older than him. She's in her 50s, but she looks considerably older due to drinking&smoking.

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