For those who have ex's...imagine what life would be like if you were still together

mine said "is it too soon to say I'm falling in love with you?" at about the two week mark... he later, after much bizarre behavior said "I'm giving you my heart, have I said that yet?" it was so strange and matter of fact and very N like. It was like he had a checklist of things to say. He didn't say "I love you" often. He did mention changing my last name to his and another time said "I need you as a lover, a friend and a wife"...of course I wasn't supposed to actually take any of that seriously. He did say "I love you" as he boarded the flight out of town that last night. Later he was drunk in the hotel with the "coughing tv" and acting the more bizarre than normal. So, projecting here..if he hadn't drunkenly given me his email password...I think I'd be in the nut house. I cried every single day, great big, ugly heaving sobs. I lost 10 lbs in a month. I wasn't sleeping because the crying made my sinuses close up and I couldn't breathe. I was so miserable and confused. I knew I needed to end it with him and I just couldn't do it. I was being torn in half from the inside. I might have been like one of his other suspected victims and decided to jump off a bridge.