Not that it matters

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#1 Apr 1 - 8PM
faithinthefuture
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Not that it matters

Not that it matters & it really doesn't but it makes no sense to me and just need your input.

I haven't seen or talked to the xN in a year. When it ended I told him he was dead to me and would never be a part of my life again. I still mean that with all of my heart!

But....a friend told me, she said I know you don't care but this will make you feel even better and yeah it did.

She said the xN looks like total shit and no one can figure out what the hell is going on with him. He has become just an ass. Nah just took them, like me, to see the real him.

This is what I can't wrap my brain around. He & I were the best man & maid of honor in their wedding. There was a very cool pic of the two of us taken on the beach. Well it was cool at the time. I ripped it up and threw it at him when he was leaving.

She told me he has put that pic on his FB pics! I mean WTF!He has done this within the last 3 months. He's been gone since last March. I haven't seen it becuz I blocked him a month after he was gone.

But why now? Why not when we were together? He knows I want nothing to do with him. Is he thinking...oh wait they don't...but is he thinking if I find out about it I'll be pissed and contact him? Is he trying to show that at one time in his life he had someone wonderful vs the dirty skanks he's f'n?

I will admit it gave me great satisfaction to hear it. And even more knowing if this is another one of his games to get me to contact him...I WIN! He can have that pic on there for the next 20 yrs & he's not going to hear a peep outa me. Sick twisted little MF'R!

Apr 2 - 10AM
JRB123
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Make him look good

I agree, I think it's definately to make him look good and normal! It is to show other women that he can get great looking ladies so then they will be flattered that he has chosen them! They are so just about themselves, it's almost unbelievable. The N I was involved with has a photo on FB of him and some acquaintences promoting a charity event and he is standing next to a teen beauty queen. He looks like such a sad old man next to her, like he's her grandad! He probably think he looks awesome! Out of about 10 guys in the photo he is standing right next to her really closely. It is one of the saddest photos I have ever seen! It's all about them! Well done on 1 year NC.
Apr 2 - 6AM
gettinbetter
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multiple reasons for this

1. To look normal. To give people the impression that they are capable of normal realtionships 2. Possibly to drive some current NS nuts. Mine did this when we reconnected on fb after I posted pics of my family he posted pics of himself with the ex only at that time he called her his "best friend" and I know for a fact they were no longer together. 3. To possibly solicit attention from the ex. Mine said to me "how do you think she must feel to know I have a pic up of her and I and I refer to her as my friend" Mine still has a pic up on his classmates of her and him and supposedly he is engaged to someoneelse! So yeah It was done with intent. Everything they do is done with intent and purpose. He knew it would get back to you
Apr 1 - 9PM
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

the pic

Is a marketing tool/self promotion... "Look at me...I'm handsome and a chick magnet"
Apr 1 - 9PM (Reply to #8)
faithinthefuture
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Michelle

LMAO!!! my first thought was he only put it there to look at himself!! But he's not handsome...a charmer yes...his charm makes him handsome. A chick magnet? He can get all the skanks he wants and does and has. And they all know he was with me. So why now put my pic on FB?! They all know we're not together.
Apr 1 - 9PM (Reply to #9)
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

You may be right...he might be gunga din

But remember, in his grandiose mind, he's gorgeous... AND there is something about "being attached" that for some reason makes one "more desirable"...don't know why but I've found it myself...single as all get out, phone does not ring at all...when I'm with someone...forgeddaboutit! So, he's in a dry spell, I presume you're good looking so he's gungadin and "look what I can pull" in his best steward smalley voice: Goshdarnit, I'm fine and yikes! Chicks Looooove me! It was a public relations campaign...I don't think it had to do with pulling you. He's not thinking about you...Spring has sprung and it's matin season. (false) IMAGE (false) IMAGE (false) IMAGE.... Hugs!
Apr 1 - 10PM (Reply to #10)
faithinthefuture
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You presume Michelle?

Hell yeah I'm good looking! LOL I will say for being 52 I am not bad. Oh but I would love to be ;-) I didn't think it had to do with me either. I find it comical that he would use that pic to lure chicks. He's 600 miles away from me living in his home town where everyone knows our history. So maybe he's trying to say hey look she's on my FB and we're still good friends and even tho after 10 yrs this is how special we are to each other. ROFLMAO!!! I can see that. But Michelle I have soo many friends there who know what he is & what he put me thru that wouldn't have a problem calling him out on it. Really in the end who the hell knows what his warped mind is thinking. I was just curious becuz I could make no sense of it. And the why of why he did it doesn't really matter does it. It's enough to know he's just f'd up.
Apr 1 - 10PM (Reply to #11)
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

faith...

I concur...who the hell can figure them out? AND when we try to... what does that make us...ROTFL... "You can't rationalize crazy"
Apr 1 - 9PM
Arwen
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Ah...revenge is SWEET!

Ah...revenge is SWEET!
Apr 1 - 9PM (Reply to #2)
faithinthefuture
faithinthefuture's picture

patience

who's revenge do you mean? Mine or his?
Apr 1 - 9PM (Reply to #3)
Arwen
Arwen's picture

your revenge of course!

He looks like shit...I love it!!!!!!!!!!
Apr 1 - 10PM (Reply to #4)
faithinthefuture
faithinthefuture's picture

OOOHHHH COOL

Yeah patience revenge is sweet. People tell me I look better than I have in years and knowing he looks like shit is soooo sweet. Of course I always looked better than him. And he knew it and hated it. And I'm 17 years older than him! :-) The joke he always said was I would be pushing him around in a wheelchair taking care of him cuz I was in better shape. He'll have to find an electric wheelchair cuz I'm not pushing him anywhere. Except off a cliff! I've been NC for a year. I read here every day. It's becuz of that I'm where I am. I went thru 10 yrs of D&D & finally said no more. It's been a year of heart wreching hell but what it came down to is that I deserve so much more than him. So do you. Stay close to the board. The knowledge and advise is priceless. It's an amazing group of peopele. I wish you peace of heart. It will come.
Apr 2 - 2AM (Reply to #5)
dudette
dudette's picture

Looking like Sht

That's really funny because mine looks like shit at the moment..... His XW told me as she needed help for her son at school, she asked me for advice etc.... anyway, she says the dorian gray thing is heppening to him and he is looking really ugly.... The funny thing is that I have kind of done the opposite...not voluntarily, I have gone back to me pre-baby weight of ten years ago, make a real real affort to look after myself for work particularly..... People say to me that I am beautiful ....even his ex-wife emailed me to say - OMG you look so beutiful and poeple in the know have been saying "you are soooooo out of his league" Very validating!
Apr 2 - 7PM (Reply to #6)
Redhead1
Redhead1's picture

I told exnarc I was the only

I told exnarc I was the only thing between him and white trash. That was in one of my few angry moments. Sure enough, he picked him up some white trash that wouldnt leave her fiance for him. I think just getting away from all the drama and projection is liberating. I know I now feel much calmer. A lady at work ask me if I was dating someone because I was glowing. I told her I was just happy. I have got myself back and feel much stronger. I don't think I realized just how beat down I was. How I had stop caring for myself. You girls rock! Thanks for all the support.