This amazing post is by Guest Blogger:


The pain of nc is a process of many things you are trying to accomplish; its not just about silence on your end, its the continual work 24-7 of letting go of the persona, facade, illusion, living in a fantasy world that was nothing but a lie that you believed in and loved very deeply. Remembering what you are facing and coming to painful terms with will greatly help you stay nc. Its time to face the music, and take off the rose tinted glasses - its time to look into the light no matter how much the light hurts, its time to see and realize the damage he has done to you, its time to take action and see this man for what he is - there are no more quick fixes with sex, or hearing his voice - even if you dont care what he says is a lie you just crave to hear his voice and those sick terms of lying endearment he used on you that you would DIE to hear again..... because be careful what you wish for, more contact one day may just be the last contact that will totally destroy you.

With NC you are extracting yourself mentally and physically from a world that never in a million years would have brought you happiness NOW, or 20 years from now - its only a temporary fix back into the house of mirrors that made it SEEM so. What ever you felt with him was fleeting; for the moment, a day, maybe a week .... Something that is not real can never last and their actions are living proof of that.

I am going to turn this around looking back he was MY supply - a supply and fix that kept me from facing my own reality, a sick man that simply pretended to be everything he knew I wanted - I got some heart breaking news for you; that is what they are for everybody and only those that are strong and stay grounded in the real world are the ones that can escape. Life is not a fantasy - real life is full of contradictions and compromises, give and take, growth and change - something a psychopath is never capable of doing, but he will fool you into believing he can.

I know very well the feeling of living on the greatest love high you have ever felt then being thrown off the highest building and landing on your face; that is what we all experienced. You get up, dust yourself off and for awhile you say, WTF just happened just last week I was the love of his life and know I feel like I have died from the fall. When I landed on my face it woke me up from the coma he had me in - you wake up and you no longer see prince charming but you see him for what he is and the fantasy he had you in. Give him the silent treatment for all eternity because this is a man who was a murderer of everything you ever loved - show this man what a silent treatment REALLY IS - he gave you the silent treatment to make you feel like you didnt exist, return him the favor and let him know he is dead and always has been.

Jan 3 - 1AM
kokosiru's picture

Thank you

Jun 14 - 7AM
MissDaisy's picture

"Life is not a fantasy - real

May 30 - 6PM
thebigpayback's picture

very important point

Oct 28 - 6PM
perplexed penny
perplexed penny's picture

This is wonderful

May 9 - 11AM
helldweller's picture

Thank you very much for this.

May 2 - 5PM
sexy72's picture

Wonderful and very moving post!

May 2 - 5PM
sexy72's picture

Wonderful and very moving post!

May 2 - 6AM
SmartLadyInMD's picture

Never Look Back

May 1 - 10PM
constantturbulence's picture

Thanks so much!

Apr 29 - 7PM
RustyGal's picture

Very true!! I am learning to

Apr 28 - 12AM
Kitty Kate
Kitty Kate's picture

My Fix

Apr 28 - 8AM (Reply to #23)
SmartLadyInMD's picture

Pathetic and insecure

Apr 29 - 5PM (Reply to #24)
neverlookback's picture


Apr 25 - 6AM
SmartLadyInMD's picture


Apr 24 - 11AM
Used's picture

This so so true.... Beign

Apr 24 - 10AM
Sparrow's picture

Apr 23 - 10PM
abreva's picture

So many jewels here - thank you!

Apr 23 - 9PM
chris magan
chris magan's picture

Thank you so much Goldie,

Apr 23 - 9AM
Grymel's picture


Apr 23 - 8AM
Ophelia's picture


May 2 - 8PM (Reply to #15)
sexy72's picture

3 Months N/C

Apr 23 - 6AM
bgirl's picture

Absolutely xxx... Never has

May 2 - 8PM (Reply to #13)
sexy72's picture

Right On!!!!

Apr 22 - 11PM
Alissa's picture

Thanks for writing this,

Apr 22 - 7PM
Goldie's picture


Apr 23 - 10PM (Reply to #7)
neverlookback's picture

Goldie and all

May 2 - 8PM (Reply to #10)
sexy72's picture


Apr 25 - 1AM (Reply to #8)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture


Apr 26 - 6PM (Reply to #9)
neverlookback's picture

I totally agree

Apr 22 - 7PM
Janie53's picture

Encore! Take a bow, standing