INDENTIFY; DON'T COMPARE.....A NARCissist IS A NARcissist IS A NARCissist.....ABUSE IS ABUSE IS ABUSE.....

WHAT WE TOLERATE or would not tolerate and WHY.

In response to a post regarding different types of narcs. Those who name call and physically abuse vs those who do not.

Those who are sexually deviant and those who are not.

It's real simple with Narcs

They target what they want and who will put up with their particular brand of abuse. All narcs do not physically abuse or name call by any stretch, not sure where that myth originated from.

I was talking with a friend one day, who was also out of a relationship with a Narc, and she said: I WOULD NEVER BE WITH A MAN WHO WAS ON CRACK OR HIT ME!!!

She was referring to my narc and me. I did not KNOW mine was on crack, I am not a part of that world and when he hit me I was stunned and did in fact call the police and he eventually went to jail.

Her narc who was MISTER professional, never called her names, hit her, or stole from her, YET, he was a serial cheater and engaged in threesomes and strippers, ect...

I thought to myself, I WOULD NEVER ENGAGE WITH A MAN WHO CHEATED ON ME AND WANTED THREESOMES.......!!!

Same shit different day. Truthfully one is not better or worse than the other and it is a waste of time to compare; THEY ALL SUCK.

Sometimes people take offense to comments about what one would or would not put up with and that is their problem; not yours.

WE ALL have our deal breakers, and while they are different, when it comes to a narc, they will get away with what they can and if they want you in their life, some of them are smart enough NOT to cross over your deal breakers.

Mine knew if he acted weird sexually with me IT WAS ALL over so he never even tried, not to say, he was NOT weird sexually, just not with me.

ABUSE IS ABUSE and it comes in many forms and what we allow, is what is still an issue to US.

Some narcs have a variety of OW, so they can play out their dysfunction all over the place. The one who allows such and such and so on. They have the sweet girl for their home base and the more lively sexual partner for some of their more deviant behaviors and the two rarely even know each other exists until the bitter end.

Abuse is abuse is abuse.

I am glad you are seeing this now.

GREAT JOB; interesting post. Wakes you right up to the fact that it is far more beneficial on here to identify as oppossed to comparing with our narcs.

God bless,
Goldie

For additonal support, to join one of our support groups, or to speak with Goldie directly, http://www.lisaescott.com/blog/goldie

support@lisaescott.com

Jan 3 - 9PM
Callie
Callie's picture

So True

Jun 22 - 2PM
TruthbeginsToday
TruthbeginsToday's picture

WE ALL have our deal

Jun 22 - 2AM
evergreen
evergreen's picture

Non violent Liar.

Aug 18 - 6AM
Jareth
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My narc actually SAID that to me

Jul 5 - 10PM
missymiller
missymiller's picture

My exhnarc abused me in all

Jun 25 - 10AM
normanthecow
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Thanks for this

Jul 13 - 7AM (Reply to #15)
Lovely1
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What is your story? I am sure

Jun 16 - 9AM
Redhead
Redhead's picture

Amen, Goldie!!!!!! Hell, I

Jun 10 - 9PM
Reason2Believe
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At this point in my life and healing

Jun 10 - 11AM
PrettyFlame
PrettyFlame's picture

Wow..great blog. Thank you!

Jun 10 - 1AM
rosedewittbukater
rosedewittbukater's picture

Thank you Goldie!

Jun 9 - 12PM
fallingfoward
fallingfoward's picture

So True....

Jun 8 - 9PM
Movingforwardnow
Movingforwardnow's picture

Great blog

Jun 8 - 5PM
Canada
Canada's picture

Thanks goldie, I seem to hit

Jun 9 - 2AM (Reply to #7)
Costa
Costa's picture

Ditto J

Jun 8 - 2PM
Layla
Layla's picture

Can we have a group hug?

Jun 8 - 12PM
Portia
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Dealbreakers

Jun 8 - 5PM (Reply to #4)
bettawoman
bettawoman's picture

Hit it on the head

Jun 8 - 12PM
TruthbeginsToday
TruthbeginsToday's picture

very helpful post

Jun 9 - 2AM (Reply to #1)
LindsayM
LindsayM's picture

Thanks Goldie

Jul 10 - 11PM (Reply to #2)
jay_blue
jay_blue's picture

My N asked me the same thing