Everyday its a Struggle because this is so Unfair

It has been four weeks since I broke it off with the Narc. It was a rather devastating ending, I met the other woman (shared my story in the share your story section) who was a girlfriend of 6 years, I was a girlfriend on/off for 1 1/2 years.

It's a struggle every day to not wonder what is going on with him. I am still so full of anger and pain. He was such a terrible person. I just feel so wronged. No one deserves this... and yet, I just walked away after all of the feelings and exchanges, and words and it is just suppose to end. I want him to feel pain. I want him to know how it feels. Its not fair that he doesn't. The only comfort I have is that he can't feel anything, love or pain. He is numb. He is also addicted to pain killers as well (found that out a couple days before the crazy encounter that ended our relationship).. so he definitely isn't feeling anything.

How can you come to grips with something that is so unfair? It is hard for me to believe that he can't be in pain after he caused so much pain to others...and he saw it visibly in front of him when the two women he called "girlfriend" exposed him for who he was in front of his face.

Just struggling...