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Streams of Consciousness

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#1 Mar 31 - 9PM
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

Streams of Consciousness

Looking back to some of the dates I had with N's or the like and especially with the last guy, there were many times where I blurted things out to him or them that seemed random at the time. For instance, in the beginning, I remember telling this last N, that I wasn't an impulsive person and that I am pretty boring. Not that I was putting myself down, but almost like I was warning him. This happened on several occasions and I would think to myself, "Why did I just blurt that out." Really weird! Have any of you had this happen?

Apr 1 - 12AM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

not my experience with the psychonarc....

ive always been the type of person that strangers would sit down beside me and spill their guts to me..once i was on an Amtrak from California to the Midwest...and during that trip, some guy sat down beside me in the observation car...and just spilled his guts to me that he was a smuggling drugs...i was a bartender for several years in my misspent youth..and made a lot of money as a shot pouring therapist... in hindsight i'd say the psychonarc had little interest in ever knowing me on any intimate or personal level.....he's a man of few words, being a f-ing psychopath...and he expected the same of others...it was more like Dragnet..'just the facts'...age..social security number..credit score... i think my fascination with him was that he was the ONLY person i'd ever met who didn't tell me all about himself... now i see why, of course... other than knowing him in an FORENSIC sense.....i know no more about that bastard after 17 years of being tortured and tormented by him than i knew in the first 17 minutes......
Apr 1 - 7AM (Reply to #7)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

Interesting, narnarc. People

Interesting, narnarc. People tell me things all the time too. This has been both a blessing and a curse because I hear a lot from people that is too much information! :) He shared a lot. He showed me his true colors VERY early. I checked on some of what he said and it was true. He told me that he thought he was "Bi-Polar or something", that he experienced extreme highs and lows. He was also very upset that I had no interest in being friends because he said that there really was noone in his life that he could talk to. I suspect that this might all be true, however, I also saw the other side which was the fact that he had NO interest in me or my life, except when it came to things that he could use for his manipulation. Who needs friends like that?!!!
Apr 1 - 8AM (Reply to #8)
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Neveragain5...again not my experience...

the psychonarc is the most secretive pile of sh!t i ever stepped in....i swear on my own mother's grave that when i asked him what favorite his color was, he said....'none of your business'...!!!! VAGUE...he was always very vague...he thinks he's hot sh!t on a stick...considers himself some sort of criminal mastermind, but he ain't all that..i'm not sure whether he was too stupid or too lazy to come up with a plausabile personality to present....he had no childhood rememberancees that he shared...no firm and absolute likes or dislikes..... instead he used the very insipid 'man of mystery' angle..everything was TOP SECRET... up to and incluing his favorite pizza toppings.!!!..when pushed he would hang his little psycho head and say that he'd been 'hurt' before by revealing too much about himself......i bet!!!... and even with all of this he somehow managed to sucker me in...but not for long...by the time i was completley sure he was some kind of a whack job...i was trapped....
Apr 1 - 12AM (Reply to #5)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

what is there to know...

he doesn't really "exist" ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims
Apr 1 - 1AM (Reply to #6)
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

what there is to know...

PRECISELY....lights are on...but no one is home....
Mar 31 - 10PM
running
running's picture

streams....

Yes, I think because they know how to catch you off guard, they watch for your vulnerable moments.
Mar 31 - 10PM (Reply to #2)
Amazed
Amazed's picture

Streams of Consciousness are the Real You

The N makes you in the beginning want to take your guard down, tell him everything. "Be yourself" and share your hopes and dreams with them, and the hopes and dreams usually involve them, and what you want to do with them, or in particular in your case, stating who you really are, and intend to be. Saying I am not impulsive, or boring sends a message to him " you know I am not really smitten by playing games..I have a feeling that is what you are about, if that is you, I am not really intersted." Just like I told my exN, you know, I would love to be able to give my new husband a wedding band with diamonds inset in the ring,,that was a blurt of consciousness, I have never been married, however really want someone to devote and share life with. I thought highly enough of him, to tell him this. Your comments are your true feelings, honor your feelings before the manipulation of N takes over!
Mar 31 - 11PM (Reply to #3)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

My true feelings came out a

My true feelings came out a lot with him! I remember waking up one morning, looking at him and calling him a "Desparado". At one point, he told me to leave him alone and stop messing with his head. It was weird because I don't go around saying disrepectful things with normal people. It seems that I get really defensive and bitchy around N's or people with those traits.