I don't see the logic?

9 posts / 0 new

#1 Mar 17 - 1PM

iznjho

I don't see the logic?

Its been a couple of months since i've been on here. I've actually been healing a whole lot more than I ever thought I would. It wasn't until this past weekend that i've had all these thoughts going through my head.

My friends and I went to a party. The ex and his gf were there. Since the last 9months he left me for her, I had not yet ran into them. I actually only looked their way once, but my friends told me they could see him looking for me especially while he kissed her. What made me mad is that he who never wanted to go to parties with me bc "it wasnt his type of scene" and during the break up threw in my face that one of the reasons for leaving me is bc I go out to partiesand drink(even if it is once in a while), is there with her! And not only that but she was there drinking without him being mad over it. She's a 17-yr old in high school but for some reason it wasn't ok last year when I did it my first yr of college.

I don't understand what's his purpose of trying to hurt me more than he already has. Or what his deal is of being so lenient about her drinking or why it's okay to go out to parties now?

#2 Mar 17 - 2PM

ForeverLearning

There Is No Logic, It's All About Making You Jealous

There is no logic to it, it's all about making you jealous. That's why your friends saw him looking at you when he was kissing his girlfriend. Very immature stuff on his part, you are sooooooo much better off to be rid of him. Keep reading all you can, so you'll become so much wiser to these CREEPS and you won't hook up with a LOSER like him next time around! All the best to you and hang in there.

#3 Mar 17 - 3PM (Reply to #8)

TexN (not verified)

ExN did the same to me...

I would ask him if we could go out dancin & he said he was not into the bar scenes anymore. He met his new gf at the same dance hall we met 7 yrs ago. I asked, "I thought you weren't into goin out?" He said, "You know my first love is country & western dancing & she loves it too! That's all I ever wanted, was to go out once in a while...What an a**hole!

#4 Mar 17 - 2PM (Reply to #2)

bitterdestiny

I agree mine went as far as

I agree mine went as far as to take a girl on a date (a girl I knew about and had become friends with) while he was on the date he called me just to start a fight, she said it was horrible they were eating and he was screaming at me. Why did he do this because I was showing that I didn't care he was with her anymore so he needed to set me off. But he wasn't so stupid she asked to answer the phone so I would finally know they were together he told her no. Why did he do this just to make me care. My anger makes NC very hard I find out something new and have to snap at him instead of ignoring it.

#5 Mar 17 - 3PM (Reply to #3)

enoughalready

bitterdestiny

why do you torture yourself like that? i know if i went to the same places as my ex, i know it would anger me. What does all of this accomplish for you? anger, resentment,sadness, stress, feelings of betrayal, sleep deprivation, low self-esteem ? I wouldn't want to know more of his hidden deceptions and lies. It'll drive me crazy! i need to renew myself and erase all the evil that consumed me. NC hurts me too but it's better than lowering my self-esteem and pride lower than it already is- thanks to my ex- parasite. I feel NC is the best as everyone here has stated.

#6 Mar 17 - 5PM (Reply to #4)

bitterdestiny

You mean by becoming friends

You mean by becoming friends with her? I knew there were other girls but she was the begining of the end I found out it was all a lie then. I always told her it was her or me I could leave her with him and save myself or let her escape and keep dealing with him I chose to let her go. I don't go where he does honestly NC would be easy for me we live in seperate states work opposite shifts I guess I stayed because I knew he would never leave but now it seems as tho he has so now I'm waiting for it to hit and for me to move on.

#7 Mar 17 - 5PM (Reply to #5)

enoughalready

bitterdestiny

yes. i felt badly for saying that to you when I did- sorry if i hurt your feelings. Unlike the "N"- I imagine how I would react in your situation and feel it would put me over the edge. Anywhere he goes be it the gym ,restaurants, grocery store-I avoid like the plague. it would kill me to see him with another woman. Hearing it from someone is different from actually seeing it. I was fortunate enough not to be in his crowd of friends as i don't drink or go out to bars as he has. Anyhow- we are all going through such a rough time and hope we all can go through life without anymore abnormal obstacles

#8 Mar 17 - 6PM (Reply to #6)

bitterdestiny

You're fine it didn't bother

You're fine it didn't bother me you're not the first to ask lol. At first I talked to her to try to get her away he was mine but then the truth surfaced that everything he told me he told her, this is when I found out he is a N. It was hell for me To here it all and I think he went to her to as my therapist says she was a new wolf him and I were fine then I found out about her she lives 10 minutes from me. It almost put me in the hospital (sorry if this is sporadic it was a dark time for me) he used her against me in sooo many ways and when it was all said and done he looked at me and said you knew she was only temporary you're forever. Like it was all just a game he rarely brings her up now but she still haunts me and I personally think she's got a little N in her but she's a another battle for another day. Right now I just want the healing and moving on to begin :)

#9 Mar 17 - 7PM (Reply to #7)

Barbara (not verified)

logic?

logic? with a Narc? LOL!!! doesn't compute ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims

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