Did you ever feel like playing games with him?

DON'T. It's a losing proposition. 1) You're not doing No Contact. And that's the first step. 2) If you're engaged in these games, you CANNOT HEAL. You need to think of him as deceased. Dead. Passed Away. So, you can't contact him. We cannot beat them at their own game. We have humanity, kindness, feelings, goodness, etc. Trust me, I've thought of many ways of responding to him to make him hurt the way he has hurt me. But after I thought about it at length, I decided to do NOTHING. Doing nothing is the best approach. Just stop. The lack of attention is cutting off their oxygen supply, and will give you time to heal.

can you beat the devil at his own game?????????? what about they DO NOT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT YOU OR YOUR FEELINGS DO YOU NOT GET? THEY DO NOT CARE! YOU ARE AS DISPOSABLE AS A BABY'S USED DIAPER YOU ARE AS EASILY REPLACED AS GOING TO A BAR/CLUB THEY DO NOT LOVE YOU! NEVER HAVE! NEVER WILL! WON'T DON'T NEVER CARED!

Ive learned the hard way, just read all my posts. I thought spying on him, allowing him to see guys hit on me, not answering calls etc ect. would burn him....NOPE...the just play harder. When the real you back in they get worse and more disrespectful. There is NO POINT in playing games. Its just as exhausting as a relationship with these morons. They have no emotion, so the already have the upperhand in the "game". You should GET OFF on the fact he will NEVER have you again. Thats a win in itself. Thats what pushes me forward, he can say whatever he wants to other...about me and try all the moves he wants. But he will NEVER have me again, and that makes me the winner. I guess everyone learns on there own, start thinking clearer, allow yourself to feel. All the ladies on this sight taught me what to do and how to do it, and slowly but surely, Im coming around! You can to!!! NO CONTACT!!!! (as Barbara would say) is the only way!!!!!!

I have fantasized about stringing my ex along and then dumping him suddenly, in other words, try a hand at his game. But, it was purely a 'revenge' fantasy, period. Back to real life! Playing any kind of games with these guys is playing with fire, they will always win, this is what they live for. They're better at it than us (games), and the end result would be just more hurt for you. Plus, they love any attention, him knowing how preoccupied you are with him just feeds his ego. I know you likely want him to hurt as much as you do, that's normal. But this will not accomplish your goal. Ignore him, and start rigorous deprogramming from this guy.

if you know it won't work - why even ask? DO NOT DO IT!! IT WILL BACKFIRE! read: http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2009/04/16/illusion-management-pathological ~~~~~~~~~ The world is a dangerous place, not only because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing. - Albert Einstein Visit My Info. Website for Abuse Victims

I played this one on a guy I had dated last year who was a complete jerk - possible narc, but don't know him well enough to assess that. Definitely an abuser/manipulator. I had a run-in with him at a pool party, (I looked fantastic) he was being friendly. Then we added each other back on facebook. He had just gotten into a relationship. I left my fb page open for him to view whatever (I lost feeling for him though, so I really didn't look at his page at all and couldn't care less about him.) After he left his girl (and I knew he would because he is an immature flaky jerk) He waited about two or three weeks and emailed me. He said, he had been looking at my fb page and thinking about the good times we had. I politely refused to go out with him. I told him I was seeing someone else. Then he caught me a week later online dating and asked me out AGAIN. I refused again and cut him off my fb. The end ;) Nothing to crazy, but I kind'ov hope it made him burn a little knowing that I didn't want him back.

I got my chance last year around this same time. After a quickie Vegas wedding my ex narc left me again after only 2 months for the same girl he had been tormenting me with for 2 years. I was so distraught and mentally unhealthy (couldn't eat-lost 40 lbs in approximately 3 months, could not sleep)that I would go into the library were I work (high school) and check out books from the psychology section. One day with a stack of books in my hand, one of the teachers/ coaches asked "hey whats with all the books"? I told him I was going through a messy break up, and he offered to take me out to dinner. We got along really well and started dating. Well as soon as the narc got wind of this he was crazy. I tormented him in the ways he had done me. I told him about this fun new guy in my life and that I was busy. I would lie to the narc and tell him I would just be at home doing nothing and then go out with my new male "friend", and then tell him all about it. I told him when we had sex and gave him all the details. Oddly, he NEVER got mad. He got weirder and obsessed and stalked me. It just meant that I upped the game, and he took it to the next level. If I said this new "friend" and I had sex my narc would say "try and get right home the next time and I will be waiting for you, so I can have sex with you the same night". The games just didn't work the same on my narc, and it was totally and extremely exhausting! I don't know how they do it. Side note:don't feel bad for the teacher/coach, for he is a major womanizer. Not a narc but someone that I knew better than to think I could be serious with. He made it clear in the beginning that he is single and that is how he wants it. I ONLY went out with him to make my narc jealous :~(