Goldie's blog

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The Empathetic Male with the Narcissistic Female

The Empathetic Male with the Narcissistic Female

I have noticed many similarities in the Males I work with in recovery from a PD, female. There are volumes of information regarding the empathetic women and how she fits the profile for the Narcissistic male on the prowl for supply, not so much pertaining to the male empath attracted to the female PD, or the female PD looking to the male empath for supply.

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When can you feel sure that the Narcissist is gone forever?

We draw people to us

When WE have unfinished business.

It's the nature of the energy and power within us.

Did you ever notice how you run into people or hear from them when you either were thinking of them or have a "need" or desire?

It's the same thing when your time with them is "truly" over. I'm not talking about them being with someone else, I'm talking about you being done.

When we are done with someone, finished to our core, there is no longer a need or desire to draw them to us.

I often will see someone I used to know one last time, I'll run into them and we both realize, there's nothing there, nothing left.

I call those encounters, closure encounters. You know you have come full circle.

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Maya Angelou, Rest in Peace, Dear Phenomenal Woman, you touched me and millions of women globally.

I know she will rest in peace.
She was one of my rocks.
I loved her deeply.
She touched my soul and I know she knew my pain, struggles and confusion.
She was an angel sent by God to ease the suffering of women.
She taught me to stay in the game of life and lose my self pity.
To see the hearts of my sisters and know that there but the grace of God go I.
Her light and wisdom allowed me to become a better person.
Through her words of:

Hope
Grace
Strength
Courage
Truth
Peace
Freedom
Laughter and joy
Reverence of God
Love

Maya Angelou, You will be missed and treasured eternally.

God bless~
Goldie

A big thank you to Oprah Winfrey who introduced us to this phenomenal woman.

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Why Detoxing From A Narcissist is Difficult

When with a Narcissist................

Often in the beginning, we feel special, lucky, chosen. Wow, he wants me and he wants me with such vigor. This must be love. Who else would act so smitten so fast and "make me feel" like I am the center of his universe?

Once you FEEL this, this all encompassing "love" and attention, it's tough to LET GO of it, even years out, when you know there is much much more to the story of the so called, love of my life encounter.

Meanwhile, once HE has you hooked, he pulls back, he lets his hair down and begins to find fault in the very things about you which he claimed were your endearing traits. He may do this subtlety, it may be overt.

Generally in the preening stage, all he wants is YOU, someone like YOU.

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The love bombing by a Narcissist

The love bombing by a Narcissist

Is our first clue that something is wrong.

"Healthy" people have lives. They don't have time to engage with you around the clock in the beginning.

Yes, many of us mistook the constant attention for love.

It is not. It is fake. A huge red flag. Not healthy. Bad sign. Manipulative. Needy.

I certainly don't have time to engage with someone to that extent either. Unless of course my co dependency and love addiction kicks in and I become obsessed with another and put myself and my needs on hold.

This is how the dance begins. Their manipulation and our fantasy thinking. Us wanting to believe that love means catering to us 24/7

Men know that some women have this need, desire, this fantasy of what love is supposed to look like.

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Scheduling a One on One with Goldie~Narcissist Relationship Recovery~Support

Scheduling a One on One with Goldie~Narcissist Relationship Recovery~Support

When scheduling your one on one, please provide:

Your time zone and

Exact Available times and dates (time ranges).

Many say, anytime is great. Due to time zone differences 2 am, may not work best for you. Lol. This is why I require exact times.

The session is an hour on the telephone.

Goldierocks@me.com

Some use Internet dial up services. I provide you with a phone number after you order your session. I use a secured landline.

Not necessary to send me your story unless we are working on mediation preparation work.

You may order your session, right here,

http://www.lisaescott.com/blog/goldie

Look forward to speaking with you soon.

Together and a Healing,
Goldie

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Happy Easter to our Forum Members and Readers, and to their Families

Easter is one of my favorite holidays. It is a renewal time; a rebirth. A time to RISE AGAIN.

We all have an opportunity here to move forward on the PATH FORWARD and although it is a long winding road at times. Together we can do what we cannot do alone.

When I came here over 4 years ago. I was defeated, depressed, and actually questioning myself as to how I was going to make it out of this mess I was in and if I even had the strength to do it this time.

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Will the Narcissist treat the Other Woman better than me?

I have a question for you, what is your truth?

I am asked this question daily, will the narcissist treat the other woman better than me?

What if he did?

What does that mean?

Even if someone prefers to treat someone better than you what does that say about them?

What does that say about you?

Honestly, my x narc could treat the next woman like a queen, a goddess, and it still has nothing to do with me.

I grew up with a father who ignored me (could not see me) and treated my ordinary sister like a queen, goddess, and so on.

For years I could make no sense of this and it hurt my feelings.

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"Guard Your Heart"

"Guard your heart."

This is where the problem lies for us. Still looking for approval, water if you will, from the dry well. This is what got many in the problem in the first place. Looking for approval from our dad's (a normal expectation) and the bf/husband (again, a reasonable want and hope). They didn't have it to give. Not in a way that we found comforting.

Some may have lost their Mom's or they were emotionally absentee or roller coaster in personality.

I have been there. Wanting so badly to receive the support from the men in my life. Yet it was not in the cards.

After feeling the pain and releasing it. Acceptance becomes the key. And a strong resolve to never ever put ourselves in a position to look for approval to that extent outside of ourselves again.

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