CD

I have been a wreck today;
WHY? I don't know I don't want the loser'
Pain so much pain always pain; I am not even with him and he finds a way to bring me pain'
I thought today about what has been happening to me in the past couple days'
There is no way in hell I would allow him back in my life'
so why do I spin when I am told about his Vacation with the GF;
WHO CARES
we never went any where OH he would talk about it but hell most of the time we didn't last long enough to make plans; Or never had the money'
I can't believe this shit'
I have allowed this to mess the whole day up'
Thinking about how happy he is and how unhappy I am'
I sit here reading and fighting this nightmare while he is off with the new girl planning a damn Vacation'
Dang
Which I already know want last 4 weeks before he decides she ant the one'
I know the truth I KNOW HIM why am I letting my mind run away'
He goes to someone who he knows will tell me'
and ask for the favor
he is seen in the clothing store on the phone Talking so loud the whole store stops to stare'
Two days in a row !! by two different friends
NAAAAA NO WAY!!
I ant falling for this'
what next the depression and I want to die like he did before'
to get me to break NC'
I loved him with every inch of my being at one time so much I lost myself'
I believed his lies; when he said you're the love of my life ; a one of a kind'
SCREW him
he Blows in the wind
never knowing which way he will turn; One wrong word and he is off and running;'
That's not normal
whether he is playing me or not I must slow down enough to think ' and not let my anger get the best of me'
I am not the girl I use to be; I will not play into his hands'
I know I was good to him; I know I was! he can say what he wants about me'
But I gave him a lot more than he deserved'