Narcissists say the strangest things... and we are often left scratching our heads -- trying to make sense of the senseless. Remember, Narcissists are not normal. They don't think like we do. They don't speak normally either. Most of what they say is meant to confuse us, throw us off and manipulate us. They use backward-talk, projection, martyrdom and almost ALWAYS provoke us to respond in a manner they can then use against us. They are brilliant manipulators. NarcSpeak is a huge red flag. If it happens more than once - you need to get out of the relationship - before you end up too brainwashed or too abused to think straight or function. They often use NLP = NeuroLinguistic Programming - used in sales, marketing, politics and... seduction/ mind control. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neuro-linguistic_programming#Techniques Entire websites are dedicated to teaching people how to manipulate and control others: http://www.cultcontrol.com/?hop=20754 http://www.coverthypnosisguide.com/nlp-mind-control.php Scary, huh? It is critical you are aware of this tactic so you can recognize when it is occurring. Below are common Narcissistic comments that we have translated. First comment is THE NARCISSIST SPEAKING Second comment(in italics) is the TRANSLATION ~~~~~ I need to hear your voice. I need to hear you tell me how perfect, wonderful and smart I am. I need you to stroke my ego. I'm just trying to care of myself. Myself being the operative word here because I am the ONLY one who matters. Why should I take care of my RELATIONSHIP? I am so wonderful I can find another target EASILY! Its not all about you, you know... Right. Because it's all about ME ME ME ME ME!!!!! (as he dances away singing 'I'm Too Sexy') Have you always been like this? Has any other man told you that... If I make you feel bad about yourself, you will fear being alone and will never figure out that I am sick and inhuman. What is with the flannel pajamas? Why don't you want to look good for me? I am only turned on by whores, strippers, prostitues and porn. I have a raging Madonna/Whore Complex. Because you are good and sweet to me, you have become sexless in my eyes. You'll never get away. And I will make sure of it with these covert threats. And don't even THINK about telling people what I really am! What do you like about me? Come on... give me some supply here... I'm fresh out and my ego would like a hit! Who takes care of you better than I do? I want you to think you can't take care of yourself so you will become dependent on me. I'm going take over your life, turn you into my puppet and have some fun! You took that out of context. Damn, you're on to me. I need to make you think you're losing you mind and imagining things. I will deny everything I said. - a Narc classic It's like walking on eggshells living with you... I never know what mood you will be in next. PROJECTION! TOTAL PROJECTION!! If you really love me, you would understand me. You need to anticipate my needs better! I equate getting EXACTLY WHAT I WANT with someone's love. Love is a THING to me...a means to an end...not an emotion. I have no emotions. Think of our children and what this is doing to them I'll use anything to guilt trip you. I think I'm a really good person for you to know. I'm going to suck you dry and take you for all you're worth! Yee haw!! I feel a sort of twinship and kinship with you. You're a great target. I'm lining you up as my next victim. Wonder if you'll fall for the 'you're my soulmate' line? No one knows you better than I do. You're going to be what I want you to be, so bend over and take it! NARC: Get a Life ME: I do have a Life outside of our relationship... like being a mother to my children. NARC: No you dont I am your life and don't you forget it. You are nothing, no one and just an object... I am the sun; everything revolves around ME ME ME! I will never change. I don't see any reason to change. I'm perfect. You don't like change. Don't even THINK about changing, baby. You're here to serve ME and MY NEEDS only! You need someone to tell you what to do. I want you to feel so dependent and incompetent you have to ask MY permission to breathe. I control your reality and your life! NARC: We are not together. (very next sentence): I love you Confused? Good... because if I keep you confused and off-base you will be very easy to brainwash & control. If you leave... you will always be back This is an NLP 'embedded' command to make sure you never break free and feel guilty for even thinking about it! Sure go out and date others, but you will always come back... they all do. I'm so perfect every girl wants me... I just sit around and wait for my phone to ring. I am KING OF THE WORLD! I have no interest in doing anything with you and haven't for a long time. I'm not attracted to you either. I don't want you, but I don't want anyone else to have you either. I know that's wrong, but that's just the way I feel. I have no interest in anyone but myself. Everyone else is an OBJECT and 2-dimensional for me to control. I don't feel anything but I have some new targets going and need to keep you off balance because I'm not quite done with you yet. By the way I can't feel a thing... just toying with your mind. Women are a dime a dozen. I have deep rage and disrespect for all women. They are all warm plumbing to me. I bang 'em and leave 'em... they were all put on this earth to service me! I am star quality, I can't even bother going out to the bar it's like I am of celebrity status. I am delusional and I want you to agree with my delusions! Oh, and I expect to get comped everywhere I go too. I am perfect... kneel before the King! You need to be taught how to be affectionate. You said "no" to all my outrageous, pervy, sick demands and for that you will pay!! Kneel and worship ME ME ME! Easter is a time for forgiving I hope you forgive me so I can continue hurting you over & over. I don't love you yet, just give me time. I can't love anyone... give me time to degrade & use you You read too much into everything. You're getting close to figuring me out, damn you! We will never be able to be together. Now that I have you brainwashed and totally in love with me I'm going to grind you down and hurt you so badly you'll never be able to get up again. You know that's not what I meant to say, so stop twisting my words Twisting words is MY THING!!! I'm a soul-less predator. You know the answer! I don't know what to say to brainwash you more, so I'll let you twist and fill in the blanks for awhile. I'm not going to get into this right now! You're catching on to me... I am going to shame dump and guilt you so you will stop questioning me. She could stop harassing/ stalking/ bothering me. She just chooses not to. This is what I tell everyone to make her look like a whack-job and then feel sorry for me. Actually I am harassing her relentlessly, she's just trying to defend herself... and I'm going to tell as many people as will believe me!! I love being evil and hurting good people. We are ALL stuck in a hall of mirrors. I am such a Narc I think everyone is a souless, emotionless, mirroring projection-machine like me. To me the world is all mirrors... I need them to survive. Don't you???????? I don't like to have my OFF button pushed I don't like when people call me on my Bullshit. I'm only happy with you 30% of the time. I'll throw out some nonsense to shame-dump on her so she doesn't see I'm a miserable narc 110% of the time! Why would you stay with someone who abuses you, you come back for more, why? It's all YOUR FAULT I'm abusing you. LOL!! go me! (Tarzan yell) We have been more intimate online/ on the phone than we ever could be in person. I actually like being intimate online more than in person cause its easier to fool you into believing I have feelings of intimacy just listening to my voice, its just easier for me to pretend everything over the phone rather than in person, that way you can't see me rolling my eyes, watching porn on my computer while calling you a dumb bitch under my breath. Besides, I prefer hookers. I have finally met my match. For the next 5 minutes. This line works really well though so I say it to every one of my targets... let's hope they never meet and share notes! I see something in you. ...I can exploit, use and abuse for my own needs... so bend over baby 'cause here it comes. You were abusive to me. (PROJECTION) I was abusive to you and I didn't like you calling me on it. I should be able to crap on anyone I want, anytime I want, with no consequences. You were not appreciative of all I did for you. And no matter what you did for me, it would never be enough. You were no fun. Where did the sweet, fun girl I married go? I am a destructive sociopath and I got bored... and I get off on hurting people and seeing their reactions - so I am going to turn the fact I use others like toilet paper back on you and make you feel bad because I got bored. I was screwing around on you for such a long time and DAMN you caught me. For catching me - YOU WILL PAY! You won't take responsibility for the demise of our marriage. Because I'm sure not going to. I need to blame someone because I am NOT NORMAL and completely delusional and never take responsibility for ANYTHING!! Don't you know the whole universe revolves around ME? I don't think you and I talking would do either of us any good. Since you have me figured out and won't buy any more of my b.s. I can't face you. You scare me and you might just reveal more of the sick predator I am. "Honey, text me when you get home and get all comfy, okay" (NLP Seductive Suggestion) Don't even think about spending one second not thinking about ME ME ME! You are the most beautiful woman in the land, you're the one for me! I tell this to all my ladies... and all you bitches fall for it every time!! LOL! I want to build and share a life together, I hope you want the same And if you believe this - I have a bridge in Brooklyn for sale. You dumb women always believe this! You have the most incredible body, my hand fits perfectly on you! And if you believe this you're going to give me loads of great sex until I'm ready to move on to the next one! Honey, I came back to the office just to see you Actually I came back for something else but its a perfect opportunity to rope you in again! Tell your boyfriends to stop calling, you're with me now I'm a controlling bastard and want you to spend every waking moment on ME! I told you to stay away from me, I used to be a good person, but now I just play off other people's insecurities. I can read anyone and tell you what they're thinking, This is a BLATANT ADMISSION THAT HE'S A PREDATOR and uses control & mind games on others. It's funny...all my friends love me, so weird that she has a hard time living with me. She actually doesn't like being abused by ME??? Can you believe it?? And I am delusional enough to believe everyone else loves me! Especially ME! Where's the mirror... I would be stoked if she had a little more enthusiasm toward me. I'm KING OF THE WORLD... whooo hooo What's so hard about throwing your arms around Me? I deserve love, affection and adoration. On your knees before the King! She should be stoked that I love to surf everyday, and I'm good at it. Her whole life isn't all about ME!!! She's breaking through my brainwashing & abuse. Damn her... how can I make her feel bad?? All I need in Life is some Good Loving, some Gratitude, and some Good Meals, and I'm Happy. And it better be all about me or I will grind your soul into hamburger! She resents my Life Style. Like you said, "I Live in Lightness", and she lives in Heainess, Drama, and Ungratefulness. She ripped off my mask and figured out what a user, abuser and complete fake piece of pond scum I am. So I will now say negative things about her for calling me on my shit. Implying she's an unhappy drama queen is the just beginning of my smear campaign. You mean too much to me. Please talk to me. Damn, you found out all my lies. I need to re-brainwash you. Hopefully you'll buy this B.S. because I need to silence you! I must say she does seem happier since she has her own house. DAMN HER!!! How dare she be happy without me?? Hard to smear someone when they are so happy to mutual friends! You have become such a big part of me in every way like my shadow...I dont know how I could go on without you in my life. (this is blatant NLP - meant to implant in YOUR BRAIN that YOU cannot go on without HIM. backwards talking.) We cannot be friends. I'm doing this for both of us I could care less about you. I don't want you around to warn my new victims... Do you realize you are so beautiful and could have any man you want?... And if you believe this garbage you will swallow the nasty perverse stuff I lay on wholesale! LOL!!! go me! I used to think you were the sweetest girl, 6 months later I still believed it, a year later, I continued to believe it, but 2 years later I finally realized you really are not that sweet girl I thought you were. Damn - you used to be so gullible! Now you're finding out the truth about who I really am. How can I use this to make you feel bad? Do you know how difficult it is to explain to someone when they say, why did you breakup, she was amazing and so sweet? How much more guilt can I lay on you for figuring me out and ripping off my false mask? And I tell everyone you're psycho anyway! Are you really as secure and confident as you portray to be? I want you to doubt yourself, your gut and your perceptions so I can hurt, use and abuse you some more and when I am gone I will take up free rent in your head. She's fun, I feel sorry for her but not you. Hello, how can I hurt you today? I'm a scorpion, I sting people. I am so evil and mean and guess what? I don't care who I hurt to get what I want. I can change the tone of my voice and convince anyone of anything. Truth! He's admitting he hypnotizes, mind controls, uses NLP and does whatever he wants with people's hearts and minds. And he's proud of it (can we say SOCIOPATH?) Having an affair really does help married people in lousy marriages cope. I can justify anything I want to do. Then I'll blame you later and say I never told you that! After I get some free sex from you. I would rather spend time with my mom than anyone else Because she excuses everything I do. If I murdered someone in front of her she'd be o.k. with it. Your nagging drove me away (after his 10 year relationship was exposed). Damn you! You figured me out and exposed what a lying cheating animal I am... so now I will make you feel like crap for figuring me out. If someone is giving, I'm taking. Yes. I never give. I always take. Let's see what I can take from people today! I did it to protect you I did it to protect me but now I am going to make you feel bad by backward talking! I didn't want to make you paranoid. What I really didn't want was for you to find out! Damn you! I love you more than I have ever loved anyone before, what we have is so special. Now spread your legs so I can lie some more to get what I want. It takes two to tango. TOTAL BULLSH*T You have commitment issues Yes, you won't ignore my using and exploiting you. You want a real, honest, human relationship. I am not human so I am clueless about that. I never wanted to tell you that I really did like her as I didn't want you to worry. How can I make YOU feel guilty for MY lying? You always think you're right and never back down. You're getting way too smart for me - how I can make you doubt yourself?? Oh yeah I know!! blame you for defending yourself! I've never had this problem before with anyone. I have this problem with everyone eventually but now I'll twist the knife and make you think you're the only one. This line always gets 'em. Other people have loved me unconditionally And boy were they stupid!!! It was fun because they were soooo damn gullible. I'm sure there will be more :) Everyone and everything is here for me to use and get my needs met. There's a sucker around every corner. NEXT! Would i lie to you? I always lie to you, everyone else and even myself. I told you i never wanted to be a part time dad. How can I twist the knife and blame you for having children? I just don't feel passionately about you in the way a man is supposed to love a woman. I can't feel any emotions and you want emotions... so I will make it YOUR fault. I want the baby but not the mother. Babies don't know any different. As soon as the baby develops a mind of its own, however - I will dump it faster than I dumped you. Besides, babies are great lures for new victims... er, women. I'm too good for you. I am not human. I am above it all. Bow down and worship me while I grind my shoe into your neck. Why couldn't you have just agreed to disagree? Why couldn't you have let me win and do whatever I wanted to you, your children and everyone else? I left you because of the way you treated me. I left because you started to figure me out... Damn you. You are alone because you have chosen to be. How can I make you feel really bad? And prevent you from moving on at the same time? heh heh heh We argued all the time. You wouldn't let me walk all over you! We are different people now than we were years ago. The longer you were with me, the more bored I got and the more you started to see what a fake, inhuman piece of dung I was. Next! It's a good job we weren't together when you were younger as i may have hurt you. If you were younger, my temper was worse and I might have physically harmed you or even killed you... Sex is hassle, isn't it? I'd rather toss off - I prefer to have sex with myself. I would love to be with you but I can't stand the underlying anger. I don't like when women have a mind of their own and start to see through all my bullshit. The only person entitled to their anger is ME ME ME!! You are just too difficult... You are too smart and starting to wake up from the mind control Your expectations are unreasonable... I can't give you what you want because I am not human and I am evil. So let's make this your fault. Select something from my wardrobe for me to wear to the event tonight. Because you are my slave and if it doesn't look right or I don't get lots of compliments then I can BLAME YOU! I am KING!! (insert Tarzan-yell and beating of chest here) Making love to you just feels so perfect and so right every time. Make sure you are available to me anytime I want to get laid for free. I would never do anything to hurt you. (BACKWARDS TALK) I love hurting you, it makes me feel so powerful and in control - so never defend yourself against me. Wait until I throw you away like a used condom! (Tarzan yell) So what you up to? Who are you with? Make time for me and be waiting for ME ME ME 24/7 to go over and throw you crumbs of 'affection' so I can screw with no commitment. YEE HAW!! Maybe I should send her a text and tell her I miss her, but I'm not going to. It will just bring us back to the same circle over again. I want to reel her back in before she exposes me for the empty, predatory shell I am and I know my friend will pass messages. Maybe if I say it, it will make HER want to text me so I can be in CONTROL AGAIN! Did mommy do preschool with you today or did she just sleep all day? I want you to think Mommy's a lazy pig. (Parental Alienation) You're never going to find guy like me who will put up with you. I want your self-esteem to be non-existant so even when I'm gone my words control your mind forever! I didn't want to fall in love with you, it just happened. (Backwards talk and NLP for you to love him.) I'm at my best when I'm with you. You make me better. I want to make you feel guilty and responsible for me and how I feel so your every waking moment is about ME ME ME People have more respect for me when I'm with you. I need you around to keep my image better. My image is EVERYTHING I have become dependent on you. (THIS IS BACKWARDS TALK & NLP) I want you to be completely dependent on ME! You and I understand each other. (NLP) I want you to think you understand me and I have profiled and brainwashed you so thoroughly! Man I love controlling you. I hurt your feelings, how do you think I feel when you tell me to shut up and stop talking? Wah wah... I'm having a temper tantrum. When I can't talk to you I can't put more mind control and mental 'bombs' in your head to dismantle any resistance you might have. I NEED TOTAL CONTROL! So tell me, are you waiting? Are you waiting for me to be more? (NLP) I want you to wait forever while I toy with your heart mind & soul. I want you to be a PRETZEL. You did impact me. You had no impact on me. No one & nothing does. But if I say this it will have an IMPACT on YOU and I can take up free rent in YOUR head forever. I won't forget you. I already forgot but I want to make sure you obsess about me forever! OOOOO!! Power! It's a pity it was so sour. It's a pity I can't get more supply from you - but now I can make you feel guilty and feel like it was all YOUR fault and walk away scot-free. YAY ME! I say: I don't deserve you! He says: yes you do! You're the same piece of crap as me - and I am going to work on you until I get control back! Your character will never change. How dare you be strong enough to rip off my mask! I even had to tell you how to be affectionate towards me. Control, Manipulation, Hypnosis, Mind Control and turning you into a dirty whore and then degrading & dumping you. That's the way I like it! You stood right there and crossed your arms when I tried to hug you after you brought up divorce. I'm a big baby, waa waa waa - how dare you question me and get rid of ME ME ME!! If I buy you a camera, can you make private movies for when we're apart, my sweetie? Free porn!! WHOO HOO!!! The camera alone would pay for itself in a month. Besides, I can sell the stuff you send me to amateur sites and make back my investment plus have some woman degrading herself for me on my computer. I could sell ice to penguins! You mean you've never fooled around with anyone? (After 7 yrs of marriage and after saying 'I trust you 100%') I am screwing everything that walks so I make myself feel better by believing you are too. I think screwing around is fine for me. I do just as much as you do around the house. I'm a lazy piece of crap and how DARE you call me on it. If I make you feel bad enough I get more free labor from you! What about when you... (ex: 'Go tanning?' Which took 30 minutes as he relates it to him golfing for 6 hrs) I am so immature, everything is tit-for-tat with me. I will use ANYTHING to make you feel bad. ANYTHING! I love hurting you. I get off on hurting you. You never loved me enough. It's all about ME ME ME and you stopped giving me supply and having kinky sex with ME ME ME! I have to show you what a good husband I am. I have to reel you back in and make you believe this is all your fault because I am PERFECT! Talking to you is to fight with you. I LOVE fighting & drama - I live off of your emotional content! I create chaos - it makes me feel powerful! Please wait until after Tax Season to tell my wife you found out I'm married. She's a CPA and this is her busy season. By that time I will have painted you like some crazy, stalker, bunny boiler and make sure she doesn't believe a word you say! Relationships and fighting are wearing me out. I could care less but I hope saying this makes YOU FEEL worn out so I can beat you down verbally & control you some more. I never want to fight with another person ever again. I love fighting but I want you to STOP STANDING UP TO ME! I am the king! ME ME ME! Don't call me.....i know that you will and I don't want to have to block your number, no one wants to hear their number is blocked. I want you to call me so I can tell everyone you're psycho when I know I am the psycho! I am going to mess with your mind! I'm at my wits end. I want to completely break you down but you won't let me. Damn! Stop attacking me. I don't like being held accountable for anything. Ever. How dare you question me or rip my false mask off! I fear we are going to have a big misunderstanding and never talk again. I going to create a situation that justifies me D&Ding and make you believe I don't want to D&D you - it will make your head spin! You are such a big part of my life, I call you every morning... I don't know what I will do without you. I tell this to all the victims I call and toy with. [it's a backward NLP statement meant to make YOU feel that way - not him] You know I have feelings for you. Feelings I won't define. However I am envious, angry and downright jealous of you and always have been. You're decent, real, honest, well-liked, talented and smart. Everything I am not. But if I imply I might 'love you' you won't rip off my mask! I don't want to give up... lets go to therapy. Since Narcs can charm a lot of therapists I can convince them its all YOUR fault and make you feel like crap and further control you! We can never be friends NO friend treats me like you did. I have NO friends - I have proxies and sycophants. How dare you figure me out! I will always love you. I know saying that 'love' word gets me what I want. So I'll say it even though I am clueless as to what it really means. We will always be attracted to each other. An NLP command to plant in your brain to make sure I can come around and sleep with you whenever I want. I need to get this off my chest, you could have said that nicer to me!!! How dare you not think I am perfect and I can do whatever I want wherever I want. I am the only one who gets to speak thiw way to you! You should be bowing down and worshiping me!! I take care of this car, so I can do what I want. Possessions and money are the only thing I care about. It's all about me and I have no boundaries and believe the rules never apply to me. How dare you call me on this! I see how happy you are and it's killing me. I can't stand people OTHER THAN ME being happy! I love drama. I get off on hurting people and manipulating their emotions. Did she break up with me, or did I break up with her, it was all confusing... my friend said, she broke up with you. and he said, oh good then I wouldn't want her to hate me. ME ME ME - I need to be seen in a good light in case I want to go back and re-use old supply. This is great cause I can BLAME her for the breakup; nothing's EVER my fault! You just want me to marry you. All women think I am so wonderful they just want to tie me down. NEVER! NEVER! You think I can't get other nice girls to go out with me? I pick you. I am the greatest thing on the planet. I use this line on all my chicks so they appreciate me! Has she said anything about me? Can't believe she's not asking about me! I'm sorry for calling you and I'm sorry if you think its inappropriate, but you have been involved in my recent court battle so I thought you would want to know how it went, and it went great, anyway I was just calling you because you're the one I call when I have something to talk about" I'm not sorry at ALL for calling you. I know you think it's inappropriate but I have no boundaries so I don't actually care. However, in the past getting your sympathy and making you feel sorry for me has always worked and I have a GOLDEN opportunity to reel you back in. My Court thing! You have GOT to care about that right? I called every woman I know and left them ALL the "you're the one I call..." line with all of them because I need some supply right now and I'm fishing... Damn you for realizing what a hollow shell I am! I must lure you back! I don't think you understand my fear of loneliness. I am such a Narc I can't be alone so I will screw around with whomever is dumb enough to have me. I am so empty inside I can't even be alone for 5 mins. I don't like my urges either. And if you believe that I'll sell you a bridge in Brooklyn. I love my urges, I have no impulse control and I refuse to do anything about it! I hope this line makes you feel sorry for me. I value you. You're great Narcissistic Supply. How will you just stay away from me? Now that you said that to me I am gonna be in your face because I know you're so weak you will never block my calls, texts or emails or even get a restraining order like you should. I am gonna mess you up good! Why don't we just "take a break" for 2 months, and see if we miss each other. I have other victims to screw in the meantime all the brainwashing and NLP I did on you will make you go crazy so the sex from you will be great in 2 months. Me? I could care less... see you, not see you. But I will keep telling you I miss you because it's NLP to make YOU miss ME. Ah, sweet sweet CONTROL! I guess this relationship has not been healthy for you. Wow I feel so good inside knowing how bad I messed you up. I am so powerful! ME ME ME!! I think you just like the hold you have on me. You have no hold on me. No one does. So I will say this to make you feel guilty for saying you're gonna dump me... BOO HOO POOOOOR ME! What do you even like about me? Feed my ego baby. I don't have feelings so whatever you say doesn't even hurt. You cant hurt me. (Wow, a moment of truth... they always throw a few in!) How about your basement... I need to finish it I have been delaying so you keep me around. Now I am gonna guilt you into keeping me around. You don't need me to finish it, what about my tools Poor me! How dare you dump me How about the clothes you have here? I need you to come to my place so I can guilt you, schmooze you and sleep with you so you don't leave. I'm gonna see you again, we have mutual friends. I am gonna stalk you and follow you and harass you so BUCKLE UP BABY Well then I guess you should just never call me again. POOR POOR ME!!! HOW DARE YOU RIP OFF MY MASK AND DUMP ME! Why are you being like this? Why are you asking me to be human and have feelings? I just wanna sleep with you. Dang your nasty brain... you're gonna rip my mask off & realize I am using you. Oh hurting people gives me such a rush! Power!! Why do you get the impression there is something wrong between us? There's nothing wrong 'between us' other than you think you're in a relationship with a person but I'm just a non-human piece of cat litter who gets off on sucking the soul out of everyone around him. I don't have relationships - I have victims. I'd better make you feel guilty or feel like the problem or you'll realize I am INHUMAN and incurably sick! If you feel bad enough I might be able to sleep with you again. It will save me so much on lotion & tissues. You know I don't have a girlfriend, I do this with nobody else. Because I'm a Narc I talk backward. A lot of what I say is projection or the direct opposite. I have LOADS of girlfriends! The one who's dumb enough to marry me and a few others like you I keep on the side when I get horny. I'll sleep with anyone, anytime! I love you. I want you to love me. Do you love me? I know getting a woman to believe I love them makes them drop their defenses so I can do whatever I want to them. It also makes them take their clothes off. Love is just a word to me - like toilet paper or car keys. It gets me what I want... it means NOTHING. You know I think you are the most beautiful thing in the whole entire world. Another piece of pathological flattery to build you up so you'll screw me whenever I want and fall all over me to make my ego even bigger. Don't mean it and actually I am the most beautiful thing in the world. So using NLP & mind control if I say it to you, maybe you'll say it to me too! Wow what an ego rush! I really need some intimacy with you. Sleep with me now. What are you doing this evening? I love controlling and playing with your head & your time. Makes me feel like a big man to know you're there waiting for me while I'm with other girls who wait around for me too! The world is my oyster and I am king! Everyone waits for and on ME ME ME! Calling you: SWEETY or SWEETHEART or DARLING... Ns that screw around call people that because they can't remember their names! I saw you as a convenience. ...and an object, a thing, so how DARE you have feelings. Only I AM ALLOWED TO HAVE FEELINGS! I won and you lost and your child is a bastard. Winning is EVERYTHING to me. EVERYTHING. I must always win no matter matter what. I I I I ME ME ME ME... You drag me down. You are too much reality for me... I am special and since no one will recognize me as special I will blame YOU for that. Maybe I should be more appreciative... So here's a little tidbit to make you think I might change but I have NO intention of appreciating anything but MYSELF! I need to be married to make sure I don't sleep around in 5 years. Or use the marriage as a cover to say I am a 'nice, respectable, family guy' while I screw everything I can. She was just an ungrateful bitch. (talking about his ex) [If they refer to any of their exes as: obsessed, a bitch, ungrateful, bitter, a scorned woman/man, a stalker, a liar, a psycho, a bunny boiler... etc etc.... RUN SCREAMING because YOU will be next on that list] She forced me to choose between her and the army. And she wanted me to stop sleeping around... something I will NEVER NEVER do!! mwhaaa haaa haa! You have serious self esteem issues, you know there's only one woman for me. And I want you to CONTINUE with those self esteem issues and make them worse so you will be desperate to believe any BS I tell you. There's only one woman for me - EVERY 5 minutes! You Keep Snapping At Me, Maybe You Should Look Into Antidepressents. I want you depressed, upset and thinking you're crazy... you will be very easy for me to control that way. I would never lie to you. (typical backwards N talk. If their mouth is moving, they're lying.) I am so taken with you, in love with you, you are the most amazing person I have ever met and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. This line always works! And if you believe this I have a bridge in Brooklyn for sale for you. I wonder if we could have a sexual relationship where I pay you for your services and if you would be able to compartmentalize it away from your other feelings? Hello... can you be a sociopath like me? and a complete whore too? Shut off all your messy 'feelings'? That would be super... I have never been dumped before. I prefer being the dumpER not the dumpEE. If you expose me, I will sue you. I know a lawsuit will never go anywhere but if I threaten maybe you'll be scared enough to keep your mouth shut. I never cheated on them, I just stayed with them too long but knew it was over long before. They let me stick around and treat them like sh*t longer than they should have... and I cheated like crazy and used porn and made them feel as bad as I could because I am SOOOO great! I have only been in love one other time and until I met you I don't think the love I have for you even compares. Since I can't feel and have no idea what love is - this sounds about right! I will never get over you if we break up. [This is an NLP command to tell YOU never to get over him if you break up.] You know you are the one I love baby. For the next few minutes - but as soon as you're not around I love who ever is with me that I think I can get into bed. She played the game with me and liked it! Everyone's as pathological as me. Not my fault she actually believed me and has hurt feelings. Besides, now she's blocking my access to new victims! Your feelings [about my behavior] are your problem. How DARE you tell the all-powerful, wonderful Wizard of ME that I am abusive!! Everyone should bow down to me me me. Whatever I do or say is above reproach!! I need to be myself. So I am off to find some new prey -- er woman, to put up with my selfish, nasty, sick, mind f**king who will worship the ground I walk on until I get tired of her. I am an evil hollow man who's perfection blinds all around me. Go AWAY! If you really loved me, you'd go away and let me heal. I could care less about you... but I do care about me and I will NEVER be held accountable for anything I did to you so go away! I don't know if I want to work things out but if you file for divorce you are sabotaging yourself. Damn you! You just ripped off my mask and you're going to leave me. How dare you! (tantrum mode on) No one will ever fill your shoes and I don't want them to. And if you believe this I have a bridge in Brooklyn to sell you. I just don't want you to be happy. In the meantime, I will replace you faster than greased lightening. Just watch! No one turns me on like you. So if I schmooze you - will you do XYZ depraved, perverted stuff with me so I can degrade and use you some more. Hey, this line worked in that porn movie I just watched! We have our whole lives to have sex with one another, what's the big deal? You're an object to me. Just warm plumbing. A blow-up doll with a pulse. You want intimacy and that stupid love stuff. Go away until you're ready to be my whore. That's the reason I no longer sleep in your bed, you're mean and a bully. DAMMIT - you figured me out! Ripped off my mask! How can I be near you when you know I am a sick predator! Why couldn't you come after me instead of her, you've ruined her life. Because I can't admit I am the one who really ruined her life - besides she'll still have sex with me! yeehaaa! I feel like I've ruined your life! I know I ruined your life so admit it to me so I can feel powerful and do more damage! Don't call and threaten me!' You're too much reality for me. Every time I hear your voice I know you've got my number. So I am going to make you feel like crap for doing the right thing! No one should call me on my bs... ever! You make me out to be some Monster but I'm a GOOD person. And if I say it enough I can GUILT her into believing it. I am a Monster but I don't want ANYONE to know that! I would never leave you. We took vows before God. Since I am GOD those vows meant nothing to me. If they meant something to her, then it's just some word for me to manipulate her and guilt her with. Mwahhhh haaa haaa I never watch porn. I never watch it when I think I am gonna get caught. But I am so addicted to it. Every woman I meet should look and act like the porn babes. If they don't - I will make them miserable. No one could ever fill the void left by you. Not for at least 5 more minutes. And if you believe that I have swampland in Florida to sell ya'. You are a weak person and needy of support. If I say this enough I can program you to BELIEVE you are WEAK & NEEDY so I can bend, fold and spindle your mind, spirit & body. Mwaaahaaahaaa!! I love using NeuroLinguistic Programming on you bitches! Maybe I am not the right person for you. I am going to 'sow the seeds of doubt' in you so that you will work harder to make ME happy and PLEASE ME ME ME. This will also keep her trauma-bonded to me because she'll be afraid of me leaving her! I prefer your hatred to your love. Hate - now that's the only emotion I can relate to. I hate everyone! I want to be notorious. ATTENTION, I CRAVE ATTENTION! Positive attention, negative attention it's all the same to me. Besides HATE I can relate to. To me LOVE is just a stupid word! I know nothing of that spyware you found. Who knows on what strange websites you go and what you catch on them! I am gaslighting you babe - I am going to PROJECT and BLAME SHIFT until you barely know your own name. I will never ever take responsibility. EVER! I hate getting caught. You are all strange. All humans are a paper-cutout to me. I live in a different reality, literally. Responsibility, empathy, caring, all those things are foreign and I am FAR ABOVE SUCH mere human traits. I am infallible. I can't stand knowing that I cause you pain so I think it's best I leave and you move on with your life. NEXT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I only have five minutes to get online, so I wanted to spend it with you, angel. My IM box is blinking so some of the other poor suckers... er ladies I am targeting are waiting for my stellar presence so I am gonna throw you a 5 minute bone. Be grateful. Buh-bye. I'm confused about what I want right now. I have so many online dating profiles going. A few irons in the fire with other babes who think 'having a man' is all they want out of life. So why should I settle with YOU? There's just so much of ME to go around. You know I would never ever hurt you. ... for about the next 3 minutes or until I have you hooked and hypnotized. Then I am going turn you, your life, your self-esteem and anything about you that's good into dog meat. I'm sooo sorry for the pain I've caused.... and if you buy this I will hit you with the FORGIVENESS b.s. all the holier-than-thou push so you can forgive me and I can do it again, and again and again. BTW the only thing I am really sorry about IS GETTING CAUGHT! We have to communicate better. You are no longer doing what I demand you do. I had you nice & controlled - you need to go back to being controlled! Every man wants to be king of his castle. I am OMNIPOTENT! If I tell her EVERY man wants to be like it totally justifies my behavior and makes her feel like crap. (Tarzan yell) I'll take care of it. I want you to BELIEVE you can't do anything right. I am not going to allow you to have an independent thought because I need to keep you reeled in. I want you to BELIEVE you are codependent because then I can get you to do anything I want to TRY to please me. Of course I will NEVER say you do anything right... which will complete this vicious gerbil wheel I have you running on. MWAHH HAA HAA! I will always love you unconditionally I read this in a book somewhere... maybe she'll believe it. I felt like I was going to get violent. No woman has made me feel that way before. I hate everyone and everything. Rage is my only emotion. But think this will make you feel guilt for MY bad temper, as well as scare the **** out of you! HAHAHA Sounds like you pretty much broke up with me too then, hey? So we're even... this blame shifting things works great! Yay, me! Well, did you even love me... I wouldn't. Boo hoo, I'm a martyr... no one really loves the nasty Narc who mistreats everyone. By the way, I am incapable of loving anyone because I have no emotions. So I am off the hook! I didn't realize what a bad boyfriend I was until you pointed it out. How dare you point out my shortcomings. The next victim better put up and shut up. I hope you find a better boyfriend than me. Here's an extra helping of guilt for you, to make you feel sorry for me. Maybe I can get some guilt sex out of it I don't know what you will think of me in the next weeks but i want you to know i appreciated you. Blah blah... did I say it right? I saw it on a T.V. show, so maybe she'll buy it and I can leave looking like a nice guy instead of the soul-sucking vermin I really am.