The insane things we believed

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Aug 8 - 4PM
wholeagain
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He came home

positively reeeeeeking of some very LOUD perfume, and I knew whose it was. This same woman had also left him a teddy bear at his work with a little tag that said something really cheezy. And an ugly candle. And a bottle of champagne. He first denied he'd seen her that night, then admitted he had but he just hugged her at the end of the evening and that's why he smelled like her perfume. Then he told me how annoying she was, which was really a tip-off that he was doing something with her. Later when he was in a confessional phase, he admitted that he'd fooled around with her but said "she only gave me a blow job, she really wanted to and I let her." What a gentleman!
Aug 11 - 10PM (Reply to #21)
happydaysahead
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wow................

"she only gave me a blow job, she really wanted to and I let her." That was MIGHTY kind of him !! :P
Aug 12 - 11PM (Reply to #22)
almostlydia
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"she only gave me a blow

"she only gave me a blow job, she really wanted to and I let her." yep, cause that is what we women live for.

almostlydia

Aug 13 - 12AM (Reply to #23)
wholeagain
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Well...

naturally! What else is there? :P
Aug 8 - 4PM (Reply to #19)
better off
better off's picture

I think it was sweet that

I think it was sweet that she gave him a candle. I mean, he really loves candles. Saved him a trip to Victoria's Secret. How did you let him get away, wholeagain? He is SO considerate of a woman's sexual need to give blowjobs at the office.
Aug 8 - 5PM (Reply to #20)
wholeagain
wholeagain's picture

LMFAO

That's right! Why did he need to go to VS when this nice lady had already given him a candle?
Aug 8 - 4PM
helldweller
helldweller's picture

Yes Calvin Klein

They LOVE Calvin Klein. One of the trippiest things was how, while I shop at Target and online for everything, he would periodically lie so that he and his brother could go to the mall--now with the foster child-and go clothes shopping for his Calvin Klein underwear, Lucky Jeans, and white Nike old man gym shoes (a new pair every two months). Have you girls unzipped the Lucky Jeans? The underside of the zipper says, "Lucky You"--I got the point where I had to really keep from laughing because he would have left in a huff. Lucky me! Anyway, about the lies: mine initially lied and said he was going to see his friend, "Andrew" in Califronia for a week. By two months later, when I found out and pleaded, "Why would you do this?" he just said, "Who knows? Who cares?"
Aug 8 - 4PM (Reply to #16)
helldweller
helldweller's picture

Billing statements

I guess I am sooooo lucky we didn't live together and that he doesn't have a computer, because the billing statements, the receipts, and the email stuff would have probably killed me, literally.
Aug 8 - 4PM (Reply to #17)
better off
better off's picture

Mine made sure his wife

Mine made sure his wife "found" a receipt for something he sent me by Fedex. I was supposed to believe the most secretive man in the world accidentally left something like that lying around. He was deliberately punishing her. Didn't care about exposing me in the process either. As far as insane things to believe, the first time I knew he was lying (and I didn't believe him), was when I called him once on New Year's Eve. I never called him or even contacted him online unless he let me know it was okay (this was already quite tiresome and I was having to face the writing on the wall that he was lying about him leaving his wife)... but it was New Year's, I was out of town for days, missing him and couldn't use my computer where I was... and after some wine, I just took a chance and called his cell phone, which I knew was a mistake as soon as I heard his voice, which sounded a bit desperate. I could hear a bunch of people (female people)in the background, and I said quickly that he could hang up and say it was a wrong number, and he hung up. So I felt sick and I didn't get home for a few days... finally get in touch, and I apologized for that possibly causing a problem... and he goes.."that was YOU?! I thought it was a wrong number!!" I'm like.. are you fucking kidding me?? Like he doesn't know my phone number. And it was just in his voice, that he was lying. Then he claimed he was in his CAR, ALONE, on the way back from a ski trip he supposedly took by himself. And I DIDN'T call him on it... because even then.. I knew he would say I was mistaken, and I couldn't PROVE anything, so I just let it go.
Aug 8 - 3PM
betty2020
betty2020's picture

When i confronted the N on a

When i confronted the N on a credit card debit charge from the Holiday Inn Hotel he said that he walked over there b/c he was next door at the White Hen Pantry (convenience store)and the ATM machine was broke. I left the house and drove 25 miles to the Holiday Inn that he was at and not to my surprise but the White Hen Pantry was no where to be found. They are suppose to be masters at their profession of lies and manipulation right?? Wouldnt you think he would have come up with something better than that? Guess they just get really sloppy in the end b/c they know the relationship is on borrowed time...xoxox only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

Aug 8 - 2PM
faithinthefuture
faithinthefuture's picture

OHH I KNOW

When I confronted the N about being w/OW he said I've never been w/her. I never said her name. I asked him then why is SHE telling everyone you were together...he didn't know. I said oh so of all the people at the club she just pulled your name out of her ass to say she slept with! When I read his txt to her & asked who she was he told me she was just a figment! HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SOOO F'N STUPID!! Well loong story short....he had been w/her before he moved to my home(we are 600 miles apart-yeah at one time that killed me now I am very thankful) When I kicked him out & he moved home & kept her a secret from everyone(until he got busted banging her in a driveway in his truck) she's admitted she's an N & her therapist told her to RUN from him & she said he'll cheat on me I know. But she has broken it off w/him telling him he's embarrassed to be seen w/her & only comes(no pun intended) around when he wants a piece of ass & has put her down for gaining weight(he's 5'4" 150#-no room to talk). i don't ask..well sometimes..about the two of them but a dear friend told me cuz everyone is now seeing his true colors and is losing his friends. ;-)
Aug 8 - 1PM
better off
better off's picture

Candles at Victoria's

Candles at Victoria's Secret? That made me laugh out loud. Although maybe it was true, he needed some candles for his hotel room... along with the lingerie and the babysitter to make his room more "nice."
Aug 8 - 2PM (Reply to #2)
wholeagain
wholeagain's picture

I know right?

And also the trip to the store for wine...fashion magazines...chocolate...oh and new underwear for himself at Macy's. No condoms but he's never once worn one so no surprise there. I have to say I never did actually believe the candles. I tried, I did, even stopped in at VS when I was at the mall to see if they carried candles (they do) but couldn't make it stick.
Aug 11 - 8PM (Reply to #12)
hitandrun
hitandrun's picture

Candles

When I traveled all the time, I actually did carry a candle in a tin. Not because the room smelled, it just gave me a sense of stability...felt like I was home. But I sure as hell NEVER bought them at VS. And I didn't by new undies, or chocolate(well maybe some chocolate) or wine. Buying candles at VS is not something I'd expect a man to do unless, well, you already know.
Aug 8 - 2PM (Reply to #3)
better off
better off's picture

Well, gosh wholeagain, it's

Well, gosh wholeagain, it's really hard to be traveling for a job and staying in those awful hotel rooms. You just don't understand. Everyone needs new underwear for hotel rooms. It makes the room so much nicer.
Aug 8 - 2PM (Reply to #4)
wholeagain
wholeagain's picture

Yes

If you hang new (must be new) pairs of Calvin Klein briefs over the lampshade you can cut that tacky florescent glare.
Aug 8 - 3PM (Reply to #5)
better off
better off's picture

They all love Calvin Klein,

They all love Calvin Klein, don't they?
Aug 11 - 8PM (Reply to #10)
hitandrun
hitandrun's picture

Calvin Klein

Yeah, mine loved CK too. What is up with that?
Aug 12 - 9PM (Reply to #11)
moonshine
moonshine's picture

yes CK!!!

He loved Calvin Klein. He often encouraged me to wear his for comfort when sleeping...yeah right. They like brand names anyways.
Aug 8 - 6PM (Reply to #7)
tigger73
tigger73's picture

This is too damn funny!!!!

This is too damn funny!!!! I buy my little boy like Hanes underwear or Jockey, whatever's on sale, last week my son spent the night with idiothead and he came home(my son) with new underwear, Calvin Klein. Anyway, here's a good one...... that I BELIEVED...... he went to the strip bars with his idiot brother and friends for brothers bachelor party...comes home 4 in the morning, I had been up all night with a sick baby, 6 mths old, and the next morning i go to do laundry and there is lipstick stains on the INSIDE of his zipper part of his shorts, not the outside but inside. DUH!!!!!! At that time I was in no position to be able to leave, so i believed his stupid story of, "the stripper fell off the stage and landed in my lap". AND I AM NOT A STUPID PERSON BUT I FELL FOR IT BECAUSE I AM LEARNING WHAT AN INCREDIBLY GOOD LIAR HE IS!!!!!!!!!!! Here's another one, when I caught him mastubating all the time, even though we had loads of sex, at the end of the marriage, the day I was moving out, he explained that his sex drive has all gone away, and "see honey, it had everything to do with you, my wife who I love"..... WHAT???????? Oh, o.k., this is why you were already banging someone before I moved out. He is a psycho. I am sad for my children that this idiot is their father. God help them. Thank GOD he is not around a lot. Maybe once a week for a few hrs. Poor kids, BUT I have an incredible family, surrounded by love and support and they are doing very well. Anyway, I could tell you all a million little lies.
Aug 11 - 10PM (Reply to #9)
happydaysahead
happydaysahead's picture

OMG..................LOL

HAHAHAHAHA LMAO "the stripper fell off the stage and landed in my lap". Face first, I am assuming?!?!? OMG Tigger, I have not laughed this hard in a LONG time. Thanks for the post. Your N is quite the uhm "creative" one. You almost have to give him kudos for that one. LOL
Aug 9 - 1PM (Reply to #8)
Used
Used's picture

tigger73

i think they are lousy liar,s if they were that good, how would we know they are lying, this is what done my head in, i used to say you are not even good at it, the evidence we find, is evidence we are suppose to find cos that will get them some drama, though his ow came and told me about them, in my heart i knew, after all 3 years previously i said do you ever see any thing of name, she seems to have vanished, he said i saw her a couple of times in the street, but wasent interested, if its got a pulse, he,s interested, even my friends said you knew, you chose to blank it, and i think maybe they are right, cos why did she look for me to tell me, it was as if she thought until i tell her to her face. well then i did know, though we were friend,s only, he would never have got from me what he got from her, i still wouldnt be friends with a man in a relationship, he knew this, the amazing thing is she saw us together 3or 4 times, 3 of those times he ignored her,4th time he shot out of a chair, said something to her, and she left, so thats why i suppose i didnt take it on board, how could she put up with that shit. apparently during his time with her he went and lived with someone else for months, she still went back, if i was anywhere and saw my relationship with someone else there would be hell to pay there and then, i wouldnt care who saw it or heard it. they were twin doubles.
Aug 8 - 6PM (Reply to #6)
tigger73
tigger73's picture

This is too damn funny!!!!

This is too damn funny!!!! I buy my little boy like Hanes underwear or Jockey, whatever's on sale, last week my son spent the night with idiothead and he came home(my son) with new underwear, Calvin Klein. Anyway, here's a good one...... that I BELIEVED...... he went to the strip bars with his idiot brother and friends for brothers bachelor party...comes home 4 in the morning, I had been up all night with a sick baby, 6 mths old, and the next morning i go to do laundry and there is lipstick stains on the INSIDE of his zipper part of his shorts, not the outside but inside. DUH!!!!!! At that time I was in no position to be able to leave, so i believed his stupid story of, "the stripper fell off the stage and landed in my lap". AND I AM NOT A STUPID PERSON BUT I FELL FOR IT BECAUSE I AM LEARNING WHAT AN INCREDIBLY GOOD LIAR HE IS!!!!!!!!!!! Here's another one, when I caught him mastubating all the time, even though we had loads of sex, at the end of the marriage, the day I was moving out, he explained that his sex drive has all gone away, and "see honey, it had everything to do with you, my wife who I love"..... WHAT???????? Oh, o.k., this is why you were already banging someone before I moved out. He is a psycho. I am sad for my children that this idiot is their father. God help them. Thank GOD he is not around a lot. Maybe once a week for a few hrs. Poor kids, BUT I have an incredible family, surrounded by love and support and they are doing very well. Anyway, I could tell you all a million little lies.