Working Hard to to Heal Today

For whatever the reason I came out of the gate knotted up today. My head is busy with those conversations again about what I am going to say if I run in to xN/OW, together or separate.

And it's stirring the anger pot pretty good. I am rehashing scenes that aren't even worth rehashing. Namely because they are in the past and they are what they are and there's no way they can be different because they already happened.

Where does this shit come from? I was sort of cruising along, feeling like I made it through a couple of trigger days and was really doing good and I wake up to this shit.

It's gotta be PMS or Something. It's so weird. I know those thoughts suck. I know they are not useful. I know I have to replacement with good thoughts but I get like moments of - oh yeah, I'm gonna tell people what a jagbag he is and I'm gonna.....I'm gonna....

I can't think of any frickin' triggers that would have caused this little deal other than maybe PMS, which I don't really pay attention to because it's not like I'm having any sort of activities that I would need to actually pay attention to my stupid cycle. ....

blah.... Maybe it's ice cream withdrawal. I did not have any last night. I ate steamed beets from the garden instead. That could probably mess anyone up!

round3