Wish I Could Tell Him Off!

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#1 Apr 20 - 9AM

Anonymous (not verified)

Wish I Could Tell Him Off!

I am soo pissed off this morning! It just makes me so mad that I have to do EVERYTHING for my daughter & he doesn't do shit! This morning my daughter was acting like a brat (everything has to be perfect! I don't know if she's just spoiled or if she is going to be like her Dad & think the world revolves around her!) Anyway, I was already running late to work & still had to drop off kids at two separate schools. She was pitching a fit cos she had new sandals on & she wanted me to change the colir of her toenail polish (WTF?! I didn't!), I needed to write a check cos she had zero balance in her lunch account at school, I had to sign her sheet showing that i read her a book. I've read tons of books to her & that sorry son of a bitch hasn't read a single book to her! Anyway, in the middle of all this chaos, she starts crying for that sorry bastard! I wanted to scream & say, "What exactly is it that you miss about him...but i didn't! She's just a child & she doesn't understand! Hell, I don't understand it myself how someone as worthless as him can take up so much of my mind! I find myself thinking alot about him (today, he'll be playing the part of the "mourning grandson" to a grandpa he never visited). I wish he would fall off the face of the earth! One of my sons asked me if i thought he woyld remember his birthday...he didn't. I wish i had never exposed by sons to him. Thats what kills me the most...I allowed him to break my babies' hearts.

#2 Apr 22 - 10AM

narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)

OMG!!....

what clarity in a child!!...'how can a daddy go so long without seeing his little girl'...... what a frothing piece of shit he is..... any even semi normal human being would be ripped apart with guilt and shame at the idea of his own child saying that......but i'm sure this nasty bastard could give a rat's ass..... he is for sure at the very top of my WISHING THEM DEAD list......and it looks like my wishing them dead is about to have some success....i really do believe if we all chose one at a time to wish horrible things on, that we could influence the universe......i really do........ i'm so sorry TexN....i wish he'd step out in front of a heavily insured nationally recognized semi truck......

#3 Apr 21 - 11PM

TexN (not verified)

Counseling

We had slowed down on the counseling with my daughter but i think i need to take her more regularly. She has been crying sooo much for her N father. Once she starts crying she makes herself all stiff like she has alot of anxiety & is unable to release it! She asks, "How can a daddy go so long without seeing his little girl?" OMG, I wish I could tell her he was dead so she could deal with it & move on! I started to text him & then deleted it. This is what i wanted to say: Out of all the men in the world, why did I pick the biggest piece of shit to be my daughter's father? You are & always will be a loser. She deserves my husband's last name instead of yours cos he is a REAL father to her! You were simply the sperm donor!...I haven't been pushing my lawyer very much lately cos I'm letting the child support continue to add up. Next week he will hit the $7,000 mark not including medical bills or attorney fees. A month ago he said his employer was going to start deducting & I've yet to see anything. It doesn't take that long to get it started, does it??

#4 Apr 22 - 7AM (Reply to #7)

Barbara (not verified)

TexN

no it doesn't take that long - he's a deadbeat and do not fall for your DD's temper tantrums... start taking her regularly - she will need regular visits until everything's decided and hopefully you can get that POS out of her life for good. ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller

#5 Apr 22 - 9AM (Reply to #8)

TexN (not verified)

Thanks

I need to go back to counseling too. I have so much anger! I was bitchin' about the traffic, I want to call & tell my son's baseball coach off, etc., I'm just mad at the world BUT I know who I'm really pissed at! I hate how he portrays himself to be a caring father while his dd is coming unglue over here! He only thinks of her when he wants to get pumped up. Thanks Barbara, you always make me feel better...

#6 Apr 22 - 11AM (Reply to #9)

sanctuary

They're all buttheads!!

I know exactly how you feel. I want them dead too!! The crap they pull on their own children. They just use them like everything and everyone else. Do keep her in therapy as long as the therapist has a realistic picture of what's happening, or find one that does. And yourself too if you can. Even your sons on occasion might need some help. My kids from the first marriage, although were older, felt a lot revolved around my daughter and her emotions. It's so hard to find that balance of giving them all what they need and keeping your sanity. Hang in there! As my daughter gets older, she's actually talked about changing her name down the road. I've never even mentioned that to her. Then she created a new email because she was concerned her dad might have gotten access to the old one and used my last name in it.

#7 Apr 22 - 11AM (Reply to #10)

TexN (not verified)

Sanctuary!

Omg! My boys do think my world revolves around her too! They seem to have resentment towards dd, especially the oldest! And he doesn't hold back on showing it either! I feel like she needs me the most but they need me too. I tell you, this is exhausting! And it all boils down to the narc!

#8 Apr 20 - 11PM

angela0714

You can get out--and be happier believe me

My Narc and I shared no children. But I brought my 3 into the marriage. He brought his son who stayed with us 1/2 the time. No matter how hard it is...divorce this loser. Being with someone who saps the life out of you and contributes nothing will destroy you. Then these guys act like you're lucky to be inhabiting the same space as them. One really important thing. My EX-N's son was a bright and beautiful kid. Very articulate and displayed some real emotion. He was 5 when I met him and almost 11 now. He has turned into a mini-narcissist. Why because he has watched his father all his life and tried to emulate him. he brags about himself all the time. "I was the star of the game." "Did you see when I did this or that." Last thing I heard about him was he accused a teacher of being sexist when he didn't get the grade he thought he deserved. My daughter who's the same age said most kids can't stand him in school or camp and say he's a showoff. His father is no help. I actually heard him tell his son one day.."You have to get used to other people being jealous." "I know I had that problem." "It's hard to be the big fish in a small pond." OHHHH----PLEASE!!!!!!! You don't want your daughter feeling she's better than or more entitled. You will have a monster on your hands. More importantly, she will have problems later on in life forming and maintaining relationships.

#9 Apr 21 - 11AM (Reply to #5)

TexN (not verified)

Angela

Thanks for your comment. I am no longer with him. I try to put the fear of God in her & remind her how blessed we are to have what we have, despite the loser not paying child support. I do need to stop spoiling her though. Thanks for the reminder of what kind of monster i can create...she already has alot of her dad's mannerisms! (ugh!)

#10 Apr 20 - 10AM

woundedsoul36

I feel you! I'm having one

I feel you! I'm having one of those days too..tho no children involved. I know NC is the "best way" but boy....would I love revenge! I would love to be able to manipulate him and cause him the pain he has caused me...

#11 Apr 20 - 10AM (Reply to #2)

TexN (not verified)

Woundedsoul

Be very glad no kids are involved! My loser doesn't even pay child support! (I'm trying to work on getting his rites taken away). I think we can take comfort in knowing them crazy bastards are NEVER really happy no matter who they are with!..Try to have a good day, tomorrow is another day :)

#12 Apr 20 - 2PM (Reply to #3)

Barbara (not verified)

don't bother

don't bother, it would all be lost on them - they feel no pain exposure is the closest thing you can come to 'hurting' them ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller

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