What was your Narc like with the Television?

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onwithmylife
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What was your Narc like with the Television?

I was thinking how controlling he was with what we would watch on TV. and once in a while, he would throw me a 'bone' and let me watch a show I wanted to see, he would take his book and go into the bedroom and read, while I was left alone to watch the show, even asked him ,' would you stay and keep me company,' NO WAY,,sad..I might as well have been by myself, some unrelationship.

IncognitoBurrito
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N
N didn't watch t.v. He had a computer instead.
fooled no longer
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ditto! he hating watching
ditto! he hated watching something with me. he loved that TV more than life itself, eventually I would go upstairs to do some work. and he would watch the computer alone. he fell asleep to that computer every night of his life. when i called him to come up to bed he said ... later. sometimes I could see the light flickering but the volume was on silent. i would go down to turn it off and discover he was jacking off to underage porn. he would quickly jump up! he often like to "work" on his laptop dowstairs . after a while I discovered that the work was actually watching more porn. Italian TV has free porn on 24/7 and almost all the boys here grownup watching it 24/7 the parents find it a joke. sick f ****ers
Parizade
Parizade's picture
yes yes yes
He owned a cabin in the far north woods, almost to Canada. You would think, wouldn't you, that going to the cabin would be all about getting away from television and computers. Not so! He had a satellite dish installed so he could have constant cable connection up there, and an air card for his laptop so he could maintain internet connection. As soon as we walked in the door the television was turned on and stayed on 24/7 while we were there. He would sit and watch television while playing those stupid facebook games. I am a very outdoorsy person so the idea of a weekend in the north woods is very appealing to me. But if all you do is watch television and play facebook games why drive all the way up there to do it? I can do that at home. Now that I understand NPD though, it makes more sense. If you have no internal life you have to fill that void somehow, and television does the trick.
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture
The T.V.
and him were inseparable. That is ALL he does. If he let me watch a movie of my choice it was like some great prize. The last night I was with him he was watching "The Terminator" (ha ha, how appropriate?!) I have never watched it and when I asked him something about it he was completely disgusted by the fact that I didn't know everything about it. He is addicted to Sci-Fi. Star Trek in particular. F-ing retarded.
midnight7
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The xN, despite being a
The xN, despite being a reasonably intelligent man, was a TV addict. He could sit watching for hours constantly channel hopping - never knew what I was watching from one minute to the next. Never anything interesting either just really banal programmes. TV appears to keep Ns comatose, filling up their truly empty existences when not actively being evil which is of course all the rest of the time.
Arwen
Arwen's picture
Omg the TV. Omg. Every time I
Omg the TV. Omg. Every time I was at his place he had that TV on some awful sitcom channel or reality show and when it was time to have sex which was only exactly when he decided, on went the TV like some kind of background static. I thought he put it on so his female roomate and ex lover would not hear us having sex as the walls were paper thin in his house but even after sex he kept the tv on all night to sleep. Of course I couldn't sleep like this but he reluctantly let me turn it down. I was like a zombie I was so exhausted leaving his lair. Go to his place, forced to watch him lie in bed with his laptop while he chain smoked and I laid there with him or had to occupy myself somehow, then it was time to go to the bar and I never got a meal ever. Just dome drinks. Drive him drunk back to his place and have sex and on went the tv and smoking, his snoring and insomnia and hence mine too. YeP it sure was a romantic time with him NOT!!!!! UCHHH
Freedom101
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OMG lol. That sounds
OMG lol. That sounds horrible. I hope he was good looking and rich at least :-)
littlemisscrazygirl
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So true...
I bet I could help a bit with your curiosity. My ex which I believe has NPD was very selfish when it came to things like that. When the TV was on. It was always on ESPN. Even if I was watching a show. He would take the remote and change it. When we first got together I would make an effort to watch the football games with him. Even though I never watched sports before. As soon as I realized that he was never taking an interest in anything that I liked I stopped. When we would drive in the car. He would put on sports talk radio. Then if he was online. More ESPN sports news. As far as movies go? If I ever picked out a movie that I liked and wanted to watch. He would watch it for all of 15 minutes than he would come up with some lame ass excuse and want to watch something else. He doesn't get it. Or he doesn't like movies like that. Despite the fact that I had already watched it from beginning to end and thought it was amazing. They are clearly not open minded at all and extremely selfish. Whenever we were in the house together. It totally felt like we were apart. I would be in one room and he would be in another trying to fall asleep. Even in the day time. Actually, what's funny is that I got so used to being alone while being in a relationship that when I dated another guy I acted the same way and he was confused. lol! It's what my NPD trained me to be. Servicing and silencing. Hope that helps!
ifinallygotit
ifinallygotit's picture
Mean and rude
Are the main words that come to mind - him never realizing that we were "sharing" an evening together and that my interests needed to be considered in things like selecting a movie! I was not coming over to be bored to death.... I can still hear him sighing with great irritation about having to consider me...
Redhead1
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I think TV is their escape,
I think TV is their escape, thats why they spend so much time doing it. It keeps them from hearing the voices in their head.
midnight7
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Dear Redhead1 - This made me
Dear Redhead1 - This made me laugh out loud - thank you!
onwithmylife
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Redhead
How RIGHT you are,mine either watched TV or read fiction books usually both, all to keep from examining himself, so sad...........
blueworld
blueworld's picture
had to have control
100% it was always glee, xfactor, the voice, the glee project, american idol or manswers sometimes the pick up artist when that was on, two and a half men and dexter also in fact tosh.o tv
Im_always_fine
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So he was an
So he was an intellectual... hehehe
Movingforwardnow
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Cheaters
Interesting topic...never gave it much thought. My exN was obsessed with the show CHEATERS!
juliamarie
juliamarie's picture
Agh...the f'ing tv!
My Narc ruled the remote. He pretty much ruled everything, but especially the remote. I had to listen to politicians argue at all hours of the day! It was so negative....and stupid. He had insomnia as well so I would wake up in the middle of the night having nightmares because he had a loud, violent movie on full blast. I asked him to turn it down, and he would....then I'd wake up an hour later...same scenario. Sometimes he would turn on the light...right over my head. He'd say he was "paying bills". AGH....really??? At 2am? Do it downstairs. I love snuggling up with my animals that don't care what I watch!
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture
julimarie
funny my idiot would come to bed while I was sleeping and munch some loud food like pickles, potato chips and could not care less i was trying to sleep, once when he had the TV on too loud in the other room so i could not sleep, I politely asked him to turn it down and he made it LOUDER, only when I threatened to leave did he turn it down, what a childish assclown,...............
juliamarie
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So it's not just me!
It used to make me irate! My favorite comment was when I asked him to turn it down, and he said, "well, when you pay rent, I'll turn it down". Agh...really? I have my own condo! I wish I had just gone home immediately.
onwithmylife
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juliamarie
I felt the same way, so many times but i would come over to his place for2 days and then go to work nearby so i was so tired of driving i did not go home and go back again,this is too funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i had my own condo as well!
HardToBelieve
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Disrespectful
Last days before the breakup, I remember having a phone call with him and he had the TV on so loud I couldn't hear what he was saying to me. When I asked him to turn the volume down HE PROCEEDED TO TURN IT UP EVEN LOUDER TO PROVOKE ME. Then he said ''maybe you should listen better''. I was quiet all through as the minutes ticked on till he gave in, turned the sound off and started talking to me. By then I was so pissed off because this behavior is so disrespectful. What was the point of CALLING ME if he wasn't going to TALK TO ME and have the TV on so loud I couldn't hear him? Most likely he only called me to keep me preoccupied on HIM but he didn't care to take consideration to my schedule or if I was busy. WHAT AN ASS!!!!!!!!! IT'S THESE LITTLE INSINCERE, DISRESPECTFUL THINGS THEY DO THAT PISSES ME OFF!!!!! TRYING TO BELITTLE ME AND MAKE SURE HE ANNOYS EVERY BIT OF FIBER OF MY BODY!!!!! FINE, YOU WANT TO ANNOY ME AND MAKE ME ANGRY??? HOW ABOUT A BREAKUP, YOU SICK FREAK???? I remember criticizing him once about his disrespectful manners and he said ''HELLO, HELLO? HAVE I MADE YOU MY WIFE YET? WHO ARE YOU? MY GIRLFRIEND, YES, YOU ARE MY GIRLFRIEND, NOT MY WIFE SO YOU DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO YELL AT ME. WHEN I HAVE MADE YOU MY WIFE, THEN CAN YOU TALK''. FREAK!!!!!!! IM SO ANGRY RIGHT NOW!!!!
juliamarie
juliamarie's picture
Aren't you glad you're not his wife??
Seriously....what an ass. Whoever said you had to put a ring on it to be respectful? I'm mad, too! LOL!
onwithmylife
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hardtobelieve
stupid assclown, like Sarah Bareilles song WHO made you king of the UNIVERSE??!!!!
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture
IM SO MAD!!!!
I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT THESE INSULTING LITTLE REMARKS AND NOW IM BOILING!!!! WHAT AN ASS HE IS!!!! HE THOUGHT I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GRATEFUL FOR BECOMING HIS WIFE. GRATEFUL FOR WHAT? GRATEFUL TO BE VICTIMIZED AND ABUSED? I SHOULD SHOW YOU GRATITUDE FOR DESTROYING MY LIFE??? THANK GOD I NEVER MARRIED YOU!!! GO FIND YOURSELF YOUR DREAM WOMAN.. IM SURE YOU WILL FIND HER IN DUE TIME... MAY I SUGGEST YOU FIND HER AT LALALAND.COM???
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture
Obsessed by TV.
Interesting topic. Thanks for bringing light to this subject. My ex-narc was obsessed by soap operas on TV. He had one specific show he had to watch every single day and he followed it like it was his own family. I even believe he somehow fantisized that he was with the characters. He could never miss an episode and he even had his alarmclock set each night for when the show was gonna come on so he didn't miss it. I remember thinking from the very beginning it was quite strange. For someone who is so busy working would be so obsessed with a silly show. Not only that, but he also quoted film scenes he had seen in movies and repeated the lines that was said there to me. I found this to be true once he asked me to watch one of the romantic films when he said ''this is what true love is all about, watch it''. I didn't want to watch it but he pretty much forced me. Thats when I noticed some of the ''romantic'' things he said to me earlier were lines from the movie. So sick. When he watched TV he turned non-responsive. It was like watching someone go from normal to go in to a trance. I couldn't talk to him or even look him in the eyes. It was like I wasn't even in the room. Totally quiet. Just him and the TV. Like a little child would react!
Im_always_fine
Im_always_fine's picture
Yeh... when the NARC/pimp
Yeh... when the NARC/pimp came into my life he knew every plot line and all of the names of characters and histories of all the soaps. I asked him quite sarcastically about his being so interested in such mind vomit. He blew it off to his x wife being obsessed with them. Not ONLY is he obsessed with watching tv but he COLLECTS them!! We have 8! on the premises...2 in the livingroom...one is backed into an un-used fireplace...there were 3 up until Christmas eve when he wanted to know why I was refusing to get a tree. I told him because the tree would normally go where a HUGE tv was sitting in a corner. So he moved the tv out and I put up a tree. It PISSES me off. I am a designer...decorating my house is very important to me. But he just dumps his CRAP on top of my work...tv's...old stereos...broken phones...UGH! He's destroyed my sofa...it's white and he heads straight for it in his dirty work clothes. Just another way to dishearten me. I'm ranting....:o I think they are not capable of creative or original thought. They don't think productively. Or operate constructively. There is truly NOTHING in their minds except immediate gratification.
lightandlove
lightandlove's picture
TV and the Couch
My ex would do nothing but watch TV. He sat on that damned couch so often that he broke the underpinnings and it was like sitting in a huge "U" shape ! I should add that this was my very expensive leather couch that moved into the lounge when I moved in ! I was stupid enough to fall for his pleas and by him an XBox ! He would sit and play those car chase games for hours on end ! Then there was Mortal Combat etc etc . He would watch wrestling, war movies, crime series, The Mentalist (was a huge favourite). He would sometimes wander in whilst I was (very rarely) watching something of my own and seriously get the remote and change to something he wanted WITHOUT even seeming to notice what I was watching. Once or twice he caught himself doing this and would laugh and say to me in a boy like way "sorry honey" ... he thought it was hysterical ! TV was matched with endless supplies and imbibing of junk food - he could not get enough salty crap and lollies into him - dark chocolate was a favourite as were chips and really sweet childrens lollies ... all of these added to what would become his "night terrors". He would thrash about in bed as if he were fighting with someone and I will not tell you all how many times I would get a black eye or have to get out of bed and sleep on the floor due to his night thrashing ! So, yet another one of my expriences was - sleep deprivation - to which, he responded that I was being "a princess". I also would experience numerous times (too many to mention) when I would watch something on TV (rarely) and he would take himself off to bed with a book and or sit watching porn on the internet and he would shut me off as if I had done something wrong. In the beginning I would feel as if I had offended him ... but soon, I just ignored it ...in hindsight - I should have put all the pieces together and left him within the first 3 months of my having moved in. Sandra
fooled no longer
fooled no longer's picture
LMAO ! Classic you just gave
LMAO ! Classic you just gave me the perfect name for my Narc!!! LOLz the night thrasher!!! except mine was luckily thrashing his dick instead of me... NIGHT THRASHER It a great book title anout Narcs.
Daisyd
Daisyd's picture
tv and books
The ex NP was a HUGE reader and the only t.v. shows he ever liked always involved anything with a heavily laden women cast. Preferably young women. He loved Buffy, Zena or any other thing vampire related, Lost Girls. The only male serial he loved was Dexter.
A Narc Encounter
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This Typifies My Narc
Grad degree and he can sit and watch the same violent movie over and over and over. I stood there wondering "Do I really want this joker and his obsession as my future "life?" In fact the only time I gave him a slighted narc injury was when I interrupted him from watching the same move a second time that day to ask a serious question. He got rigged and cocky and said "OK" and turned the TV off. Not sure why I did not feel 1,000 knifes at my heart just then. It was not an hour later he "felt sick" and wanted to "go home." I was floored-and the gas lighting began the next day. I was ready for it though. I read about it in here. read my story to see how I mirror'd right back to his shocked self. Anyway, they live in a constant state of treading water. They live minute by minute and they need predictable situations. TV is sure one of them. They really hate being "them" so any distraction is great. And violent movies, well, it lets them vicariously live through the guy on TV and feel "power." But the way I saw it-my Narc planned his day very well to get around real life. Slept from 9PM to 9 AM. 10:00 AM to Noon 'Supernatural' Noon to 1:00 drive to work 1:00-4:00 appear to be working 4:00-8:00 sit at bar and get hammered 8:00 well, almost bed time or a TV show!! So, I figured he actually had to "participate" in four hours out of a 24 hour day. Real bummer huh? BUT, weekend and holidays are variables and he frantically had them covered way before they took place. For insomnia nights, well there was the dating sites. He could prowl them. But for a true narc, who hates to be alone and must have attention-it is a constant challenge to stay busy. Books and TV are the focus.
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture
narc encounter
did you date my narc, only thing i mine did not finish college!Books and TV watching incluing that stupid crime channel with all its violence, it was horrible and he would be mesmerized, i said the world is full of enough real crime,why see more on TV and this was not drama either.He was always reading and only fiction,mysteries of any kind, never read non-fiction at all. he buried himself in books and TV, he had it on all the time until I finally said something........