What is IT w him & Parking Lots?!!

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#1 Jul 21 - 8PM

BadaBing

What is IT w him & Parking Lots?!!

Evening.

Had MY therapy session today - alone.

Went grocery shopping after, guess who was parked next to my car when I came out of the store? yep

Super Narc EX! standing by his car with the windows rolled down just listening the music and sniffing the breeze

he said hi and 'please I am sorry' and 'just let me explain' as I put the groceries in my car. He told me to let him help me and I slapped his hand away. I told him I didn't want it or need it. Why was he still here and was he just in the neighborhood again?

He told me he was determined to talk to me, spend time with me. That the only problem is that I won't do that and even standing here I know you want to be with me still I can tell. He told me it was hard for me to tell him no and wasn't I tired of it yet?

then

he asked what my plans were for the weekend I told him wouldn't he like to know. This is why he is being nice. Because now I am not afraid to call his bluff.

What does that look like in our relationship? it looks like me going out w. another guy (anyone even a friend) IF i go out w. another guy he WILL sleep with someone else and thereby this spell with be broken (right!?)

I got in the car and he told me to roll down the window. I started the car and he again said my name directly and told me to roll down the window. I put the car in reverse and backed out

I went home and I don't know or care if he followed me. I went along like he didn't.

So I still love him, and yes I would love to be with him, I

would love it but it's all just crap now!

frustrates me so much! like a carrot he dangles

good night

#2 Jul 22 - 9AM

Lobo555

Wow, I'm proud of you!

You so totally handled that correctly! I hope you are proud of yourself, too, because that took such strength and level-headedness. Yes, you still love him. That's hard to let go of unless you're a narc. But the more you stay away, the more the love will weaken and clarity will set in. Now HE just needs to stay away from YOU! What a putz he is. Really. Seriously. >.

#3 Jul 22 - 6AM

Hunter

Good for you. Sorry he's a

Good for you. Sorry he's a big idiot! He's so selfish all he can see is himself. YUCK!! Love him from afar. Hunter

#4 Jul 22 - 7AM (Reply to #11)

BadaBing

on top of it today

Hunter I am going to push it and go to a dinner and movie w male friend over this weekend I honestly just want to push him to move on in his jealousy he will ask out another girl I am prepared thanks hunter aren't we used to him being an idiot by now? lol I only meant that I haven't fall out of love yet, but I am working on it!

#5 Jul 22 - 6AM

Reddley

Big balls...

He's showing up at parking lots of stores that he knows you shop at... to wait for you... to talk to you. Does he not understand that there is this thing called a letter. He can write it out, type it out, whatever... put it in the mailbox and you'll get it in a few days. This showing up uninvited shit is starting to smell like STALKING! Next time, tell him it's stalking and you will be involving the police. You have the right to be able to go wherever you want and not have to wonder if he's going to be waiting outside for you when you're done. This is bullshit.

#6 Jul 22 - 7AM (Reply to #6)

BadaBing

Reddley

Oh that is what I also called it. My sister said (after I told her about him showing up) that the reason I didn't roll down the window is because all I hear from him is 'bullshit' lol pretty funny you thought the same thing too I don't at all feel impeded to go anywhere and I won't live my life afraid of him showing up either he has already dropped off letters, cards, emails , flowers, more cards, letters, emails, flowers then he picks a fight with me or a stranger and gets arrested isn't he just lovely? he acts like a jerk thinking it will get him what he wants no can't do that anymore I have rewarded bad behavior too much this last ultimatum was the last ultimatum for me! thanks I am getting there he will give up as long as I continue to hold out and I WILL

#7 Jul 22 - 7AM (Reply to #7)

Reddley

If it smells like shit and

If it smells like shit and looks like shit, it's probably shit. He's stalking! Seriously... if he starts to feel weirder then usual... get the police involved. These clowns might have big balls but when the police are involved they turn into huge pussies. They actually learn they can and will be held accountable for their stupidity. My ex N was arrested for being an internet stalker for things he emailed her, their friends... things he posted on facebook about her. All of it was printed out and used as evidence in court and he would NEVER try that shit with me because he has already learned that lesson. Be safe!

#8 Jul 22 - 8AM (Reply to #8)

BadaBing

its' all shitty

Thanks for your concern Reddley he was just arrested last weekend for disorderly conduct I will call the police but I am going to save it as a last resort so far he doens't even care about the arrest (like I would!) you ex was arrested for stalking over the internet? what did he do and how? thanks Reddley!

#9 Jul 22 - 8AM (Reply to #9)

Reddley

Internet stalking

After his wife kicked him out.. he got his own place. They were friends at that point - or so he says. A mutual friend of theirs showed him facebook. So he added her as a friend. He looked through the photos that she had uploaded and they were their mutual friends, his ex wife, some people he didn't know... a guy hanging off of her arm that he went to grade school with... all at parties, bars, other events... He thought - Holy shit this IS my life, my wife, with my friend... but I'm not there! He completely flipped. He went through her friend's list and messaged every person in it - told them she was a drunken party whore, a slut, basically anything that came to mind at the time. Well over 200 people got these messages. On his own facebook page he posted similar things. All the people who took heart to what he had said contacted his ex wife and told her what he had done. She called the police, they showed up at his door because she felt unsafe because he was obviously unstable. The police showed up at his door and arrested him. He was in jail for 38 days before his court date. Let's just say there are a lot of bored bikers in the jail here and he got punched out a lot. All of that material was printed off for evidence in court. The judge was a female and was extremely pissed off at him but give him the choice, jail or the mental institution for evaluation. He took the mental institution because he was too scared to go back to jail and get beat up again. His evaluation? NPD with peter pan syndrome. He stopped taking the meds they gave him about a month after he got out because they made him fat. He was on probation for 2 years and they watched him very carefully too. He went to one appointment with his PO and she said "So why were you on this street on this date. Kind of close to your ex wife's place don't you think?" He was stunned and never tried it again. He is scared shitless of ever going back to jail... so I know he won't try that crap with me. I wouldn't think twice about calling the cops.

#10 Jul 21 - 8PM

happysoon

Good for you!!! So proud of

Good for you!!! So proud of you! To get in the car and drive away...must have been so empowering! They will try everything to get you back...you are so strong, I admire you for resisting! :-)

#11 Jul 22 - 10AM (Reply to #4)

mystwoman

I agree, good for you! You

I agree, good for you! You handled this perfectly! Hugs. :)

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

#12 Jul 21 - 8PM

strongblackcoffee

BadaBing

I know how hard that was for you to do! You should be very proud of how YOU handled his ickiness. You are rockin it!!!! Coffee

#13 Jul 22 - 7AM (Reply to #2)

BadaBing

hey coffee

thank you really as long as I stay NC this will work itself out if I stay NC he will eventually lose the energy to keep trying going on 9 weeks now it has to happen soon he will need some supply the more I learn about Narcs the more I see what I need to do for my self I don't feel like I am rockin it but thanks!!

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