So I had on the 80's station on yahoo radio and "Total Eclipse of the Heart" came on. Needless to say, I lost my sh*t. And I just let myself cry. Said what I needed to say to the Powers-That-Be(aka God), and then went back to my project.
You see I have my living space all torn up. I thought re-arranging everything would help change the stale energy and memories of when he was here. Of course I am finding all sorts of ex-Narc related stuff.The energy is being stirred up
Not even 4 months past D&D. I think of all the friends I've lost because of this and also because they are partiers and I just don't want to go there anymore. I'd just like to move. But that is not in the cards yet. And then I start thinking about how did a successful woman let herself get to this awful place at 44? AAAARGH!!!!!
My point in this post? No matter how strong you are, this stuff can be triggered and it's hard to control. Luckily,I am usually by myself. And my critters seem to tolerate it: )
It seems to be a balance of self-discipline and self-care. Interesting tight-rope to walk. Myself? Fall off it all the time...at least I have a net. That net is this board (and the powers-that-be,of course!)
Love to you all.