Triggering Show (Warning: Disturbing Sexual Content)

Last night I saw a very triggering episode of Dr. Phil. Apparently it was a re-run I had not seen before called "The Lie Detector Tests". Bonii was concerned that her 3-year-old granddaughter, Kaylee, was being molested by her father. Dr. Phil had concerns about both sides of the family. Bonii, Jeremy and Kaylee's mom, Krista, all agreed to take lie detector tests. The link about the episode is here:

http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/788

The whole show was about a very upsetting topic, but I was actually surprised how triggered I was watching the father (Jeremy). He looked nothing like xnh. However, his behaviors and mannerisms were SO like xnh that it absolutely made my skin crawl. He displayed all of the behaviors of a psychopath. On camera, before he knew the results of the lie detector tests, this jerk was actually demanding that his ex-wife and the grandmother apologize to poor, little HIM for accusing him of molesting his three year old. He lied, used projection, and deflected blame at every turn. During all of this, his second wife was sitting right next to him, seven months pregnant with his child, believing every word out of his mouth. She was obviously still deep in his FOG. Dr. Phil asked her if she was concerned for her baby's safety. She said she didn't know. Both the little girl's mother and the grandmother passed their lie detector tests. The second wife was not tested because her baby's heartbeat would mess up the test. The father accused of molesting his daughter failed his lie detector test.

One of the questions Dr. Phil asked the father (on air) was, "Have you ever given your daughter birthday cake by sticking your tongue in her mouth?" The father stalled and made excuses about how he was "trying to remember", he was very evasive, and finally responded with, "Why would you ask me that? No, I would NEVER do that". Dr. Phil responded with, "Oh come on! Why did it take you so long to answer? Sticking birthday cake in your daughter's mouth with your tongue is NOT something most people are likely to 'forget'." The creep turns around and says to his ex-wife, "YOU told him I did this, didn't you? More of YOUR lies!!! Now, *I'M* probably going to get beat up leaving this place." Me. Me. Me. The audience started clapping. Deflecting the blame was also very much xnh's "mode of operation" as well. Getting a straight answer from the disordered is like trying to herd Jello. If you come close to the truth, they dissolve away to another topic. Any argument with them is always "circular".

This father's behavior got me thinking about xnh's obsession with his oldest daughter, and reminded me of an incident with xnh many years ago. Xnh's oldest daughter was four years old when I met her, and she's 22 years old now. When she was about 4-5 five years old, xnh kissed her while I was with them. This oldest daughter stuck her tongue in xnh's mouth to kiss him back. Xnh promptly raged at ME that we could NEVER kiss around her ever again. Xnh said that obviously that's where she learned this. Personally, I suspect xnh was embarrassed that I saw his daughter kiss him this way, and he was trying to hide it. I would report his behavior if I thought he was molesting the kid. I was always VERY uncomfortable kissing, groping, or anything sexual around his children. Xnh was the person that liked to grab my breasts, reach down my shirt/pants, and make sexual innuendos when he thought he might be seen by other people. Xnh seemed to get turned on by it. He really embarrassed me in public several times, and I frequently felt like I was romantically involved with a voyeuristic octopus. In private, xnh usually mostly ignored me. The challenge he enjoyed was in public. Barf.

This same daughter also refused to sleep in her own bed at night unless her sister slept with her and the lights stayed on until dawn. Usually, both her and her sister ended up sleeping in bed with xnh. I heard about it when xnh whined the next day, but he never seemed to "man up" and make them go back to their own bed (I was not living with them at this time). This continued until she was about 12 years old. The last time I caught xnh cuddled up in bed with one of his daughters was after we were married. It was the youngest one, and she was 17 YEARS OLD. I woke up on a Saturday morning alone in bed to find xnh massaging his youngest daughter's back in her bed. I was VERY upset about finding this. This was very soon before xnh D&D'd. Truthfully, I never could catch xnh being physically sexual with his daughters (nor would they ever admit anything to me). However, xnh's relationship with them was very bizarre and enmeshed.

Seeing this show last night was very triggering for me with memories of xnh. The father on this show absolutely made my skin crawl. As it later turned out, the mother was absolutely correct. He was molesting his 3-year old daughter. The second wife eventually turned over the guy's computer to the police, and it contained child porn. Her baby has now been removed into protective custody. The father was recently convicted on two counts of possession of child sexually abusive materials. The judge sentenced Jeremy to five years probation, 270 days in jail, followed by 180 days of home incarceration. He is not allowed any contact with anyone aged 17 or younger, and must register as a sex offender.

To me, it seems like this disordered turd was given a very small sentence for wrecking a child's life. Personally, I think it should be legal to euthanize these psychopathic animals just like a vicious dog. That little girl will bear emotional scars for the rest of her life, and so will xnh's children. It is truly an ugly world sometimes.