The text I got from him on Friday - after a month of NC

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#1 Jan 9 - 4PM
Healingslowly_b...
Healingslowly_but getting there's picture

The text I got from him on Friday - after a month of NC

So the last time I spoke to him a month ago, he was lovely at first and then he turned nasty again and shouted that I should get on with my life and move on, he was horrible. I have heard nothing at all since until late Friday night, the evening before his birthday.

"I'm sat here all alone in my flat on the last night of my 30's and all I can think about is you. All I want to say is that I love you so very much , my life revolved around you. You have broken my heart more than you know. I'm so very sad. Your mine, I know you. I really don't know what is going on. Miss you so very much. Just don't understand a lot of things. We could have been so happy.I could for the first time in my life have been so very happy. I love you so very much, you will never know.I know you better than you know yourself. I am not a nasty person. I'm so very sad. My life was you."

This is the man who got so so drunk and used to scream at me, his eyes would go black and he said he couldn't see me properly when he was in one of his moods, he used to call me pathetic all the time, tell me to be quiet, congratulate me when I stopped talking and tell me that life is better when I don't talk, he then would ignore me and walk away, pick me upon everything I did, blame me for his moods, laugh when I cried!!

Thanks heavens I am free of this now.
It's so hard not to text back and tell him what I think of him, but I know that he wouldn't take it on board. So I haven't text back. I have deactivated my facebook account as I am fed up of people saying how fabulous his birthday party was and seeing photos of people I though were my friends with their arm round him and smiling at the party....oooh that hurts!!!

Will he ever feel any pain from what he has done to me? I hope so!!!

Jan 9 - 6PM
TNR1
TNR1's picture

His original text:"I'm sat

His original text: "I'm sat here all alone in my flat on the last night of my 30's and all I can think about is you. All I want to say is that I love you so very much , my life revolved around you. You have broken my heart more than you know. I'm so very sad. Your mine, I know you. I really don't know what is going on. Miss you so very much. Just don't understand a lot of things. We could have been so happy.I could for the first time in my life have been so very happy. I love you so very much, you will never know.I know you better than you know yourself. I am not a nasty person. I'm so very sad. My life was you." His true text: "I'm sitting here needing supply and you came to mind. I remember that you were a really good source and in my mind, you could be a good source again. As long as you follow the internal script that I have for you (and no, I'm not going to tell you what that is) I will be happy (although what I'm not telling you is that if you don't follow that internal script I have for you, you will piss me off and I will start to devalue you and eventually I will discard you again). I know words like "love" and "broken hearted" are ones that girls like to hear and I'm hoping you will fall for it again (like you did before). Also, I am hoping that by sending you this text, you will forget all the history of my Narcissistic behavior and cling to the illusion I showed you early in our relationship. I want you to respond so I'll make it seem that you are the only one for me (because I've seen in movies how that always gets the girl) although I'll also be telling that same line to someone else I used to/currently am involved with to keep my options open."
Jan 9 - 5PM
Healingslowly_b...
Healingslowly_but getting there's picture

My friend just called me, we

My friend just called me, we were chatting and she told me that she saw a profile he has set up on dating site!!! I asked her read his profile to me, not sure why really but anyway.... and "he is looking for someone who is sweet, loving, kind, sociable, lovely inside and out, open minded"....and the bit that really hurt me was " I am looking for someone who will love and cherish me just as I will her" Really????? My friend said that he had written to her to say hi! and that she just blocked him. It's crazy...was this meant to get back to me to hurt me? He knew before that my friend was on that site. I just feel very sorry for who ever he fools next. Still hurts though :(
Jan 9 - 6PM (Reply to #8)
jackguy
jackguy's picture

it does hurt but sounds like ur getting free

you are maintaining nc and getting rid of facebook etc. if you did respond lashing out at him in a text you wouldn't be the first or last to do it but they are far more hurt by being ignored and denied contact... no contact = fuck you as someone on here says...nc is also really vital to get clear of the brainwashing and it also is like sending yourself a clear message that you respect yourself I realised after a while that I respected myself too much to allow my exn any further opportunity to spout her bullshit at me Sometimes now I feel at the indifferent stage, and have certainly reached the point now where I don't feel the jealousy that used to hurt very badly...as time passes with nc it gets better and better (although I'm feeling angry again today for some reasons).
Jan 9 - 5PM (Reply to #7)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Get back at you most likely..

Get back at you most likely.. Contact = Pain.. Snooping thru your friend is contact.. This is Also a perfect example of the freaks that go on dating sites .. He sounds perfectly normal.. He's a predator ..a Lion on the hunt. hunter
Jan 9 - 5PM
foolnomore
foolnomore's picture

Text

Whenever you are tempted to return that text, remember all the crappy things he said and did to you. If you let him in, he will unleash his ugly anger on you all over again. You are no longer a source of supply and that's the only pain he is feeling. Do not for a milisecond think that this guy has any feelings other than hatred and anger. When I made the mistake of breaking NC after 2 1/2 months right after Christmas, he was so angry with me. He said everything he could to tear me down, talked about all his other girlfriends, how certain members of his family were "cunts", and told me I was ugly, etc. It goes on and on. I was in shock and felt like a punching bag. All of the confidence and self-esteem I worked so hard to build up was torn down in only a few short hours with this shell of a man. Keep posting, keep reading on this site. These amazing women have suffered abuse and are working towards a happier life. This site is a wonderful source of information and support. Stay strong! You are worth it!
Jan 9 - 5PM (Reply to #5)
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture

Thanks.

Great reminder on why not to break the NC rule. A narc is a narc. Don't for a second think yours is different or that he wouldn't be mean to you if you texted him back. It's true what you said, they will lash out all their suppressed anger, aggression and revenge for how you hurt him for not responding immediately and he is going to act like you never broke up with him.
Jan 9 - 4PM
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture

WOW lol

Wow, that was alot of 'My'' ''Im'' ''I''.... ''You hurt me'' Im laughing as Im reading his pitiful text. He is a copy of my narc and his pity post-no-contact rule. ''See me as a whole, don't just weigh my negative side, I know my positive overweighs the negative. I know deep down Im a good person. I know Im worth a second chance. I was happy when I was with you. You managed to make me feel like shit, you really hurt me feelings. You made me feel like Im the worst boyfriend in the world''... All bullshit. Bullshit. Bullshit! Whaaa whaaaa.. Cry baby! Someone please change his mouth diaper, it's full of shit! Also for the record, a man who says ''My life revolved around you'' is really sick. My ex-narc said he was obsessed with me and that his life revolved around me too. I could have sworn he was one step away from pinning up pictures of me on his wall using cum as plaster. This is how obsessed they are!
Jan 9 - 4PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Let me translate what his

Let me translate what his words say...I, I , I, me,me,me, There is only one rule in Narcville.. NO Contact.. Block and delete.... Black Eyes.. He's a psychopath... Read, get Lisa's book and thearpy.. Hunter
Jan 9 - 4PM
peachesn
peachesn's picture

Well done for standing your

Well done for standing your ground & maintaining NC. You should be very proud of yourself! Re: his pain & suffering? Karma, baby :) xx