Struggling about being in his presence today…PLEASE help!

Today is the celebration of my daughter’s birthday and this is his weekend.

He has opted for the celebration to take place at the beach. My daughter and the rest of the kids are excited.

After reading many posts about get together for kids birthday I’m very leery.

I want to participate for my daughter’s sake yet I’m not for sure how he’s going handle himself. He has asked that I ride along with them and I said that will not be an option. I’m willing to meet them at the beach or follow them.

I’m somewhat angry or should I say disappointed that he is not taking this divorce serious or should I say he is going through the motions thinking he has the option to change my mind about the divorce. Family members are saying he is going around telling them that we are going to get back together, SELL THE HOUSE (no way) and buy rental properties. That the kids and I are going to move in with his father another Narc (hell no!). Since the divorce he has given me several proposals and I’ve said ‘NO’ to ALL proposals, thus giving him no indications that HE HAS A CHANCE with me.

I hate that he was an hour late picking them up for his visitation. I’ve logged it down.
(Again he is not taking the temporary/interim court orders serious)

So much has happen which are stories to come as I need help however, my school work has kept me busy so I haven’t been able to focus on divorce.

I’m having anxiety or confusion or controlling…I don’t know! All I know is this will be the first time EVER I’ve not been there for my daughter on her birthday if I don’t participate with them. I’ve always been the one to do her parties (that’s why I think it may be a control issue). I don’t like the fact he the Narc has not raised these kids, has kept money from me so I can’t do anything with them and the FIRST weekend he has he is throwing a beach party and taking them to the international festival tomorrow. Yes, I can go yet I would like to be NC/LC.

I’m struggling as this is the first time in 20 years I’m not doing the family thing if I CHOOSE not to go.

I believe the Narc will think the wrong impression if I want to be there for my daughter.

Any help is appreciated. I need other’s perspective on what they would do or have experienced on the first of trying to do a family function yet being separated from the Narc.

Thanks
L2A

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