Something that I attribute to my success with "No Contact"

6 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Feb 1 - 2PM
neverlookback
neverlookback's picture

Something that I attribute to my success with "No Contact"

When I left this site I moved on to a different phase of my recovery; looking within. Talking with others that have experienced this is imperative to our understanding but I found myself stuck going over the same things and this was not helping me to achieve WHY I was not fully understanding how to move on from this trauma.

A few months after establishing NC, a man named Thomas Sheridan was starting to be recognized for his research on Psychopaths. I spent a good month with this man (with my headphones on)listening, learning and processing. The timing could not have been better for it was if he was saying, ok now that you have ended this dangerous relationship, let me tell you exactly what happened to you and what kind of person you were involved with and why you were left so traumatized. I watched and listened to every single topic and all the interviews and as I listened to him describe what I had lived through for almost 6 years I realized NC was not my greatest fear as much as my acceptance that I had become a victim to a full blown psychopath. For the longest time I thought I had an encounter with a lizard but I came to understand Sheridan's research on the primitive reptilian brain and how they think which is a result of their behavior.

"I DIDN'T DESERVE THIS" was a post that caught my attention because I cant tell you how many times I said that and thought that. Now as I have come to full understanding it was never about what we did or didnt deserve but what THEY felt THEY deserved and were entitled to. They never will care what others deserve as long as their needs and/or agenda is met. The psychopath that entered my life gave me the only thing he was capable of giving me or anyone. Did he enjoy the time he spent with me? Absolutely, he enjoyed it as much as his other honeymoons maybe more, maybe less .... He perceived me to be the only thing he was capable of perceiving me to be. It does not matter to them how deeply we loved them or how much we understood them, or how much we did for them because those are all the qualities we associate with a normal partner and/or non disordered individual - with a psychopath you will never never get what you deserve and not because you didn't deserve them but because they simply don't have the capacity to give back what we gave them.

Let the lizard go, because there is aprox. 90% in the rest of the population that has the ability to give you what you have always deserved; real love doesn't end after the honeymoon it only grows deeper and richer. xo

Feb 1 - 4PM
aquabella
aquabella's picture

Thanks for this, NLB...Thomas

Thanks for this, NLB...Thomas Sheridan's videos just gave me the extra push I needed to re-block after a 6 day hiatus, and finally close off the one avenue he had to reach me. Email account DELETED. xoxo Lynn
Feb 1 - 4PM (Reply to #2)
neverlookback
neverlookback's picture

GOOD

For some reason Thomas Sheridan was really able to reach me and help me understand, in some ways he almost reversed the all the brainwashing. I mean Lynn there is no magical cure that gets us through to the other side, I wish there was - As Thomas really emphasized ALL victims have to go through a pretty hellish recovery period you just do and there is no getting around it - they inflict an incredible amount of damage no matter the duration of the exposure but once you get there you are not the person you were before the experience you are far better for having survived the ordeal. NC ever again Lynn "the beast is gone" x0x0
Feb 1 - 6PM (Reply to #3)
aquabella
aquabella's picture

This 1 hour interview is

This 1 hour interview is great. http://www.redicecreations.com/radio/2011/06/RIR-110626.php I have a whole new language...reptilian cortex, love bombing, evolutionary trigger, spiritual parasite, intraspecies predator...awesome. xoxo Lynn
Feb 1 - 7PM (Reply to #4)
neverlookback
neverlookback's picture

Yes

I have listened to this interview - one in many as you well know. You forgot one "Sickophonic behavior" and really thats what it was, the fake display of how crazy they were about us, and all the sick terms of endearment they used on us and as I look back I just took it all in not even realizing what a sick display of love bombing it all was - seedy, shifty and sneaky it was similar to loving a pet snake wasnt it Lynn? I will never forget how much Sheridan helped me. I wish you the best in your Total NC, nothing good can ever become of having contact with someone like this despite all the good we once felt with them because it never lasts for anybody x0
Feb 2 - 1AM (Reply to #5)
WorthMore
WorthMore's picture

Snakes

My narc HAD pet snakes....I just didn't get it at all. He just thought it was "cool". I never saw him handle them or even really look at them. Thanks for the reference. I'll check Mr. Sheridan out.