1. Home
  2. Forums
  3. Narcissist Forums
  4. All About Him Forum
  5. silent treatment...it is abuse..that is how I found this site almost a year ago.

silent treatment...it is abuse..that is how I found this site almost a year ago.

6 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Oct 1 - 10AM
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

silent treatment...it is abuse..that is how I found this site almost a year ago.

It's been 3 weeks of silence since he told me he went back to his ExW....Silent treatment is abuse. That is actually how I found this site almost a year ago. I had been googling silent treatment, and then I found this site and saw so many traits he has listed in the stories here.
Of course, I keep thinking that maybe it was all me, maybe he is just going "NC" on me...but then I think back and rememeber that he had always told me when he "dumps" someone that he turns them off like a light switch.
When he left his exwife (after she put out a restraining order), she later wanted to talk to him after the RO was over, but he refused and filed for a divorce. They never talked again, only thru laywers. He wouldn't answer her calls or texts, he laughed at her. Now, he has snapped his fingers and let her "back in". I feel for her, because she is starting this all over again. I have learned so much, and have really realized I have been abused over the last 3 years. I just wish I would start feeling more consistent in my emotions. One day good, next day not so good. And yes...the silent treatment and no closure does make me feel so unworthy, it has killed my spirit. But I will remain strong. I have too.
Staying NC...NC NC NC
Thanks everyone!

Oct 2 - 4AM
meik11
meik11's picture

Its been 3 years for me also.

Its been 3 years for me also. My N never wants to talk about anything. He will stop talking to me at the drop of dime for no reason. I would constantly blame myself because he would tell me he doesn't like drama and I would try to talk to him anyway. To him a simple conversation was drama. I have been really upset the last couple of days and I literally want to fight him. I have been going back and fourth in my mind about getting revenge, or causing him sone type of physical pain. On the other hand I want to call and make it right even though I know it will only last a short while.... I pray I never get myself mixed up with anyone like him again... I really do want to confront him and tell him I see him for everything he is now, then slap the shit out of him!
Oct 1 - 11AM
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

oh2bfree

just a little anecdote to let you know how crazy they really are.I am over 2 plus years out, last winter I broke no contact and sent him a few nice cards and heard nothing back,one was asking if we could meet one last time for closure for me, so went on with my life, this past week, I got a postcard from him with an ad from a personal in my town's newspaper,it was not him, but a man looking for companionship and said he would sent this to me. He also must have seen an ad I placed on craigslist looking for male friends. I thought how sad and pathetic and it confirmed to me he has no life at all to do that.I sent back a card and said you blew it and look at what it got you now.........
Oct 1 - 10PM (Reply to #4)
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

Hi onwithmylife Your n sounds

Hi onwithmylife Your n sounds so crazy. He must be looking up your info online. Sick they are all sick! Stay strong! Hugs!
Oct 1 - 11AM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

The silent treatment is the

The silent treatment is the worst of emotional abuses out there. I suffered from the silent treatment often from narc #2. It was unbearable to say the least. I remember being so thankful when he would finally come out of the silent treatment and start talking to me again. Only to do it again, over something I said or didn't say. It became too much to endure. The emotions you are experience are very normal. Give yourself time to find a happy balance. You will get there, one day at a time. Treat each day as a new and beautiful day, with each day, you are further away from him. Stay strong!
Oct 1 - 10PM (Reply to #2)
O2bfree
O2bfree's picture

Hi sparrow Thanks so much.

Hi sparrow Thanks so much. Yes it truly hurts and breaks you down....I am so done with such selfishness. We are all worthy! Hugs!